[Weluv2swim]

Good morning all!
This is my first post and I desperatly need your help. We are currently in the China program with an LID of Feb 2007. As many of you might know, China has slowed down horrifically that I might not get my referral for a non special needs child until 2010-2011 if things continue as they are. Yes, we know, anything can happen but it doesn't look good. I called my agency yesterday to talk about alternatives and they suggested Russia. She gave me the time line and we could be home, with our daughter by the end of '08. Some of our paper work would need to be updated but she suggested that we are pros at it since we did it all for China very quickly. She said this is the time to adopt through Russia because only a few US agency have received accreditation. I am afraid to get my hopes up and I need some help from all you BTDT parents who have gone through this already. How is the paperchasing? Have any of you travelled blind? (husband an family MD and she said we have an advantage) How "healthy" are the children, FAS, etc? The inflammatory Newsweek (?) article didn't help my dh last night. Did you take other children -nearly 6 year old ds? How stable and reliable is the program? We are afraid Putin will shut everything down in the middle of this. I am sorry this is quite a bit but I am at a crossroad. My dh is thinking about pulling out all together and be thankful that we have our ds -which I am but I am emotionally vested in this and don't know which path to take. Thank you.

[votemom]

i'm sorry for all you are going thru. there's very little about this journey that is easy. it seems we all have that in common, even when so many finally do get their happy ending.

there are just no easy ways to sum up the russian adoption experience.

we have gone thru the adoption process twice. the first was a heart-breaking nightmare that lasted two full years and ended up with our child NOT coming home.

the second was as smooth as smooth can be - no glitches at all - and ultra fast (six months start, to finish) - and ended up with us bringing home two children.

some say the key is the right agency.
some say the key is the right region.

i honestly don't know. although i would opt for the region.

every story is so different and unique with russia. you will hear so many different scenarios.

i understand so well your comment about president putin. i constantly felt that way. i would read the russian online newspapers every day and worry.

i wish you and your family well. this is a great resource so do lots of reading here and you'll be well-served.

take care.

[momraine]

I would ask the agnecy for the contact info of the last couple of families that went through them.
Sorry I am not of more help, but I traveled almost 8 years ago and a lot has changed since then.

[DET62]

I have a daughter adopted from Russia and a son adopted from kazakhstan this year. With the situation as it stands, I would not do a Russian adoption right now, since things are so unstable.

Kazakhstan is a more reliable program at the moment, and the kids generally are more healthy, IMHO. I've also heard good things about Uzbekistan.

Go with an agency that works in a lot of different countries, is my best advice. Then compare programs and timelines.

Good luck!
Dee

[CeltiaSkye]

We adopted our son from Russia in August of 2006. Our agency works with many countries and according to them Russia is the most stable program there is at the moment. We are planning on jumping back in again for child #2 in 2008.

I'd recommend contacting a pediatrician who specializes in International Adoption. They can give you a realistic picture of the health risks involved. They can also review any medical information you receive on a referral. Most of them have a process set up so if you do travel blind you can email or fax your information to them while you are in Russia and they will give you an evaluation.

[ddahl]

All International Adoptions are unstable. Look at what is or rather what has even happened to the Guatemala program. There was a time they could not load those children up fast enough. Now???? We have a son adopted in 2005. We were involved in a shut down so it took 18 months including a 4 month glitch on the USA side.

As others have mentioned there are no guarantees. I would really take some time to thing about where you see your child. Since you are in process for China, an Asian child can be adopted from Khaz as well. The process with travel is lengthy though. Russia is Russia and they can do what they want so I believe there will never be any more stability than there is now. I say if you want Russia then go for it! There are a million children there needing families (literally). If you have a heart to adopt then please do not quit. Some place out there is a special little someone waiting for you just as you are waiting for them. Good luck with everything. Our prayers that you make the right decision for your family.

[kretzklan]

I agree that Russia is unpredictable...but I think it's a stable program if you are with an accredited and accountable agency. Please do ask for the last 2-3 names of families that have used your agency...hopefully completing adoptions within the last 3-6 months and call them. Ask them how the process was, how the in-country staff was, how the agency handled issues that arose (there generally always will be some issues). Our agency made all the difference in our process. We also had an adoption friendly region - so that comes into play.
The paperwork is what it is for other countries. Can be time consuming, but if you were completed for China, you probably have most of the things you need at your fingertips. The hardest part may be changing your I-600 (if you need that for China?)...due to that relying on the US govt. It sounds like you really flew through the paper trail already, so you'll most likely fly through it again - alot of it is your organization!
We had referals when we traveled, but the medicals you get are often so sketchy, it's almost like traveling blind. If this is what your agency is suggesting, ask the important questions. Will they be able to offer you more children if the first one does not meet your health specifications, will they be willing to have you travel to other regions they work in if your first region doesn't work, can you do all this (find a child) in one trip and not have to return for this purpose alone? Be sure your parameters on age and gender and health are known upfront. FAS and other things are always a concern...but most people on this board would tell you that it's a gamble worth taking. Since your hubby is a doc (I hope I got that right), you do have a leg up. Perhaps he (and you) can meet with an IA clinic and get a brush up on what to be looking for...correct measurements (it's helpful to take a chart, but expect any child you meet to be behind their age...just look for them to be "even" on all charts).
As for taking your son (at 6 years old), we traveled both trips with our 8 year old son. There are reasons that I'm so glad we did it and reasons why I'm not. The biggest plus is that he got to be there from the beginning, but we adopted older children and I think that wouldn't have been as important with a baby or toddler (due to the age difference). If your son is not a great traveler and not ready for a LOT of down time (just hanging in a hotel room, courthouse, car, lines)...then I would say no. It's not like a sight-seeing trip...there is a LOT of adult stuff and our son had to just sit quietly for hours during each trip. If you don't think he can do it - don't take him. It won't be fair to him or to you...you really need to be paying attention in all those situations.
I hope you find the answers you are looking for!

[karenmarq]

I just read in the paper that Guatemala is going to reopen and that instead of costing $30,000, adoptions will now be $500-750!

This whole process is so much a matter of timing.

I wish you the best in your decision. All you can do is gather the facts as of the time you start. Look inside your heart and plunge in. Then as all the facts change (which you don't think they will) you keep checking in with yourself to see if you are on the best right path.

Karen
(happy with the results, but don't care for the process)

[angelkisses0102]

I just wrote an article for another adoption site...I will post it here on a new thread as it addresses some of your concerns on the health issues relating to adopting from EE/Russia. Personally I found the Newsweek article to be one of the most honest and well balanced mainstream articles I have seen, ever.

The only stability in international adoption is it's instability...

Good luck in your decision.

[Weluv2swim]

Thank you so much for all your input! This process has been so emotional for our family and I feel like we are being pulled in so many different directions. We will take the information that you provided and our research to hopefully make our decision by early January on whether to get out of China and jump on this crazy rollercoaster.

[mcanvasback]

When people are talking about Kazakhstan and Uzbekistan, please don't forget about Kyrgyzstan. The kids are great. The program is going strong. No six week in country stay or blind travel.
Good luck to the original poster, whatever your final decision may be. Hard decision, hard process. Huge payoff!

PM me if you would like more info on Kyrgyzstan.

[cathvash]

Weluv - Yeah it's all about swimming - sometimes with sharks!

It feels a little uncomfortable making a strong recommendation for the Russia program, especially since you have already had some heartache, and everything in Russia and in every other country is sometimes volitile and political...

That said, I do think this is an excellent time to get into the Russian program. They have worked through an unstable period while trying to creat a more stable system, and I think we are close to some real and lasting stability. As long as our countries continue to have a reasonably good relationship, this should be a stable path. I worry that a lot of people switching from other countries and trying to process in Russia may eventually "glut" the system, and that could cause a lot of problems. This is another reason why I think now would be a good time to get in - before the waitlists get long. I believe that most of the agencies still waiting for accreditation will receive it within a few months, so that is not really a factor. In fact, many agencies are still working without accreditation...

The paperwork is a big "hoop", but I suspect it's not much more of a pain than in the China program. You complete the dossier at a couple of different stages, so it makes the paperwork more manageable. Most of your documents would have to be updated or ammended...

I traveled blind for both children, and it worked out very well. As far as the health, there are many children in Russia who have been exposed to alcohol, so you screen the best you can and hope for a minimal effect. I met so many beautiful and healthy children with PAPs there, as well as some who had issues (but the parents were very aware of them and open to taking the child). Some children have problems that are not apparent until later, so you take a bit of a leap of faith. Screening is key when you meet a child, and you always have the option to decline the referral and meet a different child. It is very important to be as specific as possible in your request for what types of issues you are or are not open to. If you are looking for an older child, their level of health and delay will be easier to assess.

I think the timeline your agency provided is quite possible right now, but as someone else said, timing is everything! A lot of people are bringing kids home! Best wishes!!

[randloar]

We spent almost 2 years trying to adopt from Kaz during a time when many people were moving over to that country from Russia due to the delays in Russia......well, after that long wait for us, we had to give up on Kaz last fall due to their changes in polices and requirements....so you never know when a 'stable' country will change or become unstable, and Russia is no exception... Whereas we had better luck moving over to Russia then we had in Kaz, many other families had better luck the other direction........so you never know is the honest answer and we were terrified of the potential for Russia to stop us up just as Kaz had, but we got lucky and have been home with our two kiddos for 9 months now.

As far as the paperchase.....after completing our dossier and updating it for Kaz, Russia was quick and easy and we had everything in within a few weeks (we had extra of our marriage certs etc, so that helped).

We had two referrals upon travel, but one child was 'gone' when we got there, so ended up going blind for one child.......fso we did both on the same trip. For us we sorta knew it would take a lot to not bring our boy home that we had our referral for, but we had reservations about the girl we traveled to meet, so meeting with the girls was more valuable for us in helping us to decide if she was meant to be ours or not (the medicals we got for our referrals were just over 1 page, and ours were not all that helpful.....others may get more, but thats what we got). It was definitely a stressful process to suddenly be going blind, but it worked out for us for the best......we found both of our kiddos and thats what counts.

The health of the children......too soon for us to say for long term stuff (they are 3.5 and 23 months old now), but on the immediate scale, our kiddos are both very healthy and on the developmental side have some speech delays (of course) for the older one, as well as a bit delayed in gross motor skills, but he is coming along well and it is all within range of what works for our family. We did meet a girl we strongly believe has FAS and couldn't 'connect' with her and ended up turning her down without a docs review, so we will never know if she really was or not, but we did both know she wasn't meant to be our daughter...

And the Newsweek article.......are you talking about the one for the lady (Hilt, I believe) that killed her adopted daughter? Because the description of the attachment issues the girl was experiencing was heartbreaking to read about and does happen, BUT that is where everyone says to research and learn as much as you can to go and be prepared. Its a leap, thats for sure, and I am still second guessing many things both of our kiddos do as being attachment related and in reality they could just be toddler stuff and me learning how to be a mom........meaning.....your awareness of these potential issues (health, developmental delays, attachment) will go a long way in helping you recognize and work with any of them if it happens to become a part of your life! Better than denial thats for sure (although that sounds good sometimes!)

Good luck making the decision that works best for your family!!!

[Bcelli]

We have two beautiful and healthy sons from Russia adopted at 5.5 months in 98 and 2.5 years in 04. We also were considering China for a girl. The Russia program - in general now - is shorter overall than the China program but also can be nearly 2-3 times as expensive. And depending on your agency, may require 3 trips and in-country medical exams. The wait for a boy is always shorter than the wait for a girl. I would not travel on a blind referral, myself, because of the costs involved in just getting there. If it doesn't work out, you're out a lot of travel money. Healthwise - as far as I know, Russian adoptees all come with diagnoses. You have to sort through them to determine what is and isn't valid. FAE/FAS is certainly an issue in some regions and something on which you should be educated in recognizing the physical indicators. Khazakstan is a good program, but the time required in country is about a month or so. With children already at home, that would not be possible for us. Uzbekistan has a good program, but from what I have learned through recent research, is rather slow in getting referrals out right now. Ukraine has a good program, but all referrals are blind. On the upside though, all adoptions are done independently and therefore can be completed at less cost than most others in EE. In the end, you are going to have to go with your gut. Is there a way for you to remain in line for the China program and submit for Russia at the same time? I imagine that might be costly, but with some folks, time is more of an issue than money. Good luck with your decision. It's difficult, to say the least. Do your research - like you are doing here - and if you are a spiritual person, pray for guidance. Ultimately, that's all you can really do. Keep us posted.