[Abdulina]

Hello there. Of course it can't stay boring in this household for long--LOL. We've been talking about moving out of state for months now. We have researched quite a bit but are still looking. We need to move to a state that has much better services for our children now and in the future. With 7 kids w/ special needs, you have to make sure of their future as best you can. It is in their best interest and ours to make a major life change. Not just in location but lifestyle as well.

What I was wondering from any of you is if any of you have ever lived in NH and what you thought about it. Being from NC, it will be VERY hard to lose the beach atmosphere we have here. No, were not near a beach(about an hour and 20 minutes away) but hot most of the year and have our own pool. Use it from May to October if that gives you any indication of how warm it is here. It was 70 today and it's December! I know NH is COLD. We need a change and the kids would enjoy the snow after awhile. Though Yana has already proclaimed she saw enough snow in Russia. Our main thing is we need a state that has great services for special needs and one that has decent medical & insurance programs. We need these b/c IF we do this, we will be taking the most massive paycut I fear. This decision is HUGE and not being taken lightly. We will work for a few years and at the same time, start setting up a type of foundation for kids like ours. Our goal is to buy a house w/ quite a bit of acreage. Over a period of years, set up some type of work program for kids that are capable, yet need to be supervised as adults. Our FASers are capable but yet now, the only place for them when they are older is a group home and they don't belong there. So, trying to help not just our kids but others in the same situation. Hope that made sense. There are only like 3 to 5 places like this in the entire US. Yet, so many young adults are falling through the cracks that are creative, talented and smart. Just need supervision and to stay focused more. We could do that. Don't know if it would be a farm type thing or something we'd produce. Just know it is a dream that would benefit alot of people inthe future. Not just our kids. We know this is a long shot and a risk. Trust me, we're not just dropping everything. Hence the researching that we've done for alomost a year now. We have seriously looked at NH and WY. If any of you out there know anything about these states from personal experience, would you mind sharing with me? Love to hear from you. Right now, just in the research phase and nothing more. But, knowledge is power as we all know on here.

thanks in advance.

[Annabell]

Hi!

My DH has a cousin who's bi-polar or something (schizophrenia?), depending upon the doc. Her brother settled her in Minnesota, having determined that it had the best resources.

One of her children has been taken in now by the uncle (having been farmed out to various relatives most of his life -- in New Jersey). The other child was taken away by the birth father, with state sanction, shortly after birth, and has never been seen since.

I must tell you -- if you've never lived in a bitterly cold climate, you and all your family would be in for a dreadful shock. I lived 9 years in Manhattan, and have never returned -- in my dreams, it is always sleeting, and I'm walking down a scary, dark street, and there's a hole in my worn-out shoe, and the slush is leaking in and freezing/numbing my toes.

The sad thing is that this actually happened to me. And that's what I dream about.

I don't want to be discouraging, but that was just an awful experience for me. I never again want to be that miserable, that cold, that scared.

[Kasey]

My dad has a summer home in NH, very beautiful state, winters definitely can be rough, but also alot depends on what part of the state you are in, obviously the further north you go and anywhere near mountains will be worse. But Fall is spectacular, springs and summers are beautiful.
As you know I am in PA, so I wouldn't consider change of season bitterly cold climates. You can have bitter days, but all winter is not that way right now, the mid atlantic and upper east coast have been in the 50's in December, so you just dont know.
I know real estate seems very reasonable to me up there, we are always looking atthings when we are there and I love that the states motto is Live Free or Die.

[pequele]

I live in NH next to Dartmouth College and Med Center. Prices for gas and items like milk are far more expensive than the south/east of the state. I can also tell you the closer you live to the Massachusetts boarder (and closer to major med centers) and the seacoast (YES WE HAVE A SEACOAST hahaha) the better your resources will be. Keep in mind the more expensive it will be, too (for homes/land..but gas and milk etc are cheaper haha). The further north from Manchester you go, the more rural and you can kiss the resources GOODBYE!

One of my co-workers has a SN daughter and let me tell you some of her appointments take on upwards of 6 months or MORE to get into Dartmouth. From people in the community, that is all I hear as well for just a regular appointment! And when I moved here and tried to set up my own PCP, I just have to say I hope you have a day or 2 to spend on the phone just to FIND a physician taking on new patients!

NH is NOT a cheap place to live. While I came from CA which is certainly NOT a cheap place to live, I can tell you there are FAR cheaper places to live in this country. Home prices continue to rise (ok where is that not the case), and property taxes are insane (rember we pay no sales tax here so it all comes out in car and prop taxes!). My parents' town NAILED everyone on their last set of taxes for the year. My parents have nearly 10 acres and were hammered with an extra $8k in increased prop taxes because they just levied a new land tax in the state.....that is $8k extra they had to come up with in 1 month time!!! Their annual prop taxes are $18k now! Far more than CA! Our cars cost way more to register here than they do in CA (more than double)!

Again, the closer to Mass and the seacoast, the better your recourses will be...espeically for schools. The more rural you are, the better off you'd be to homeschool haha. That is unless you want to spend over $27k a year per child to send them to one of our fabulous boarding schools like Philips Exeter, St Pauls, Cardigan Mtn, and MANY more haha!

OOO and don't get me started on the highway structure here too haha. There is 1 and I repeat 1 major highway that goes east/west in the state...and it is in Manchester/seacost areas. And there are 2 (sort of 3) that go north/south (keep in mind one of those is a mere 10 miles long too). The rest of the travel is for the most part 1 lane each way highways) it takes FOREVER to go anywhere....my biggest petpeeve coming from my CA 5 lane freeways haha.

Don't get me wrong, I do think it is beautiful here...especially further away from the Mass boarder and the major congestion. I just know from living many other places in the US that there are far cheaper places to live with better resources closer.

Oh and just a side note...we may be the "Live Free or Die" state, but when the New Hampshire House of Representatives, the third-largest parliamentary body in the English speaking world and only the U.S. Congress and Britain’s Parliament are larger....you know you are in a state with some messed up priorities

[k8c]

I think your cost of living is going to be much lower in WY than in NH. I can see the type of facility you're considering working well in WY. (Of course, I've been there and not to NH.)

While climate is something to consider, remember that just as houses are built to stay cool in the south and everything is air-conditioned, homes in colder climates are toasty warm. Personally, I'd MUCH rather have mountains than beaches, cold weather than hot.

Wishing you and your family the best with this BIG decision!
Kate

[Abdulina]

Thanks for all the responses both on and off theboard. It does help getting others opinions who actually are there or have lived there. We are just more and more convinced each day, we don't belong here anymore. Doesn't feel like home anymore, the community is majorly changing, and of course, the services for the kids. Double edged sword is my husband has a GREAT job w/ beyond wonderful benefits. However, over the years we've seen quite the drop in benes so that is not as much a concern anymore.

There are many states we've found out that have state run insurance and pharmaceutical plans equivalent to what we pay now. Remember, our kids meds if we actually had to pay out of pocket would be well over $3K per month. So have to think ahead. Also, most require much special needs services and now we have received a devastating dx for our daughter that is going to require quite a bit of care. (i'll write later about that. STill not up to it right now).

Keep states coming or anyone who has good or bad about certain states. We dont' really care to live anywhere on the west coast. Dont' mind the cold. Spent many years in Germany and of course all our kids are from such cold climates anyhow.

Keep ideas coming. We know we have to do this as it would be best for our entire family. We've been talking about it for a year now and it hasn't gone away. Many things lately are just confirming it. This may or may not happen but pretty sure it will. Getting some distention among the troops but they'll be fine. Okay, so some of them are already "panning" for their own rooms if we do move. They said they'll go IF they get their own room. I told them to watch it or I'll make everyone live in a YURT--LOL. Showed them what it was and they said NO WAY. Now, there's a way to cure some teenage attitude.

Thanks again for all the honest answers. It does help in the decision.

Take care,

[britfish]

Pequele, I didn't know you were from NH! You are going to have to make it to a New England get together!
I am also from NH, we are in the White Mountains which is considered the North Country. Yes, its cold here, but really you get used to it. The dark is the hardest. Its dark at 4:00 in the afternoon in the winter, your days are short and you do get stir crazy but w/ kids you just go outside and find things to do.
Housing prices have gotten crazy in our area. I just read an article in the paper that house prices will drop 10% by Dec. of 2007 in this area. I live in a tourist area and a lot of people from out of state buy $200,000.00 vacation homes and they drove all the housing prices up for some time. Hopefully things will slow down in that aspect.
For us to get special services it is usually quite a drive. The eye Dr. is 1.5 hr. one way, the IA dr. is 2.5 hrs. one way. But its a small state (population) so we never wait long to get an apt. Also, Irving Gas has a great program which helps reimburse for gas when going to Dr. apt. etc. We used EI for 6 months and were very impressed. the program seemed very adequate, but we've never seen any other states services.
There are a lot of tough things about living in NH, but that is the sacrifices you make for rural living. Its still the old country here where you can't make it 2 feet in the store w/out seeing someone you know and if you break down the person who owns the house where you are (and all his cousins) will try to fix your car. That type of small town community. We don't have much beach, but we have wonderful lakes and rivers. Nothing like tubing down the river or canoeing. Rope swings and river bank picnics are a summer mainstay!
Anyway, NH is quite diverse, do you know what area you are thinking of? If you have any questions don't hesitate to ask!

[DoreenG]

I live next door to NH, and moved here from the Southwest. First, I have no idea what WY stands for? Am I dumb?

Anyway, from a standpoint of growing up in the desert to moving to the NE, I can tell you I really expected much worse as the winters go. Basically, it just rains a lot here. Way more than I ever expected, and I'm guessing it does as well in NH.

The state is tiny, so while there is only the one major interstate, it's not like it takes forever to get anywhere. (again, I'm comparing it to AZ and NM)

The roads are always clear in the winter by the afternoon after the storm. It is dark early in the winter, but the summers make up for it. The fall colors are amazing.

And we moved here from the southwest because of the services were so much more plentiful here. However, I have no idea what your kids' special needs might really entail. Do you need a top-notch GI person? Etc.

Also, I would investigate which states allow/accept the Katie Beckett Medicaid waiver. That piece of paper has been a lifeline/godsend to us. The services allowed under it in our state have made our lives calm enough that we are able to pursue adopting a child and adding to our brood.

Remember, no matter where you move, it will take AT LEAST one full year to acclimize to the climate, the new house, new neighborhood, feeling like you won't be totally lost every time you leave the house, feeling like you might have a friend somewhere, for the kids to get used to their new schools, busses, teachers, etc. One full year is a long time to have patience when your plate is full, but wow, if you're ready for a move, the NE/New England area is really a wonderful place to raise kids. So much infrastructure...libraries, pools, kid events and sports, support groups, medical services (Boston U is not far from anywhere in NE really), etc.

Best of luck in your decision making!

[DET62]

I am putting on my thinking cap, Stephanie.

I live in Atlanta. You can still buy real estate at reasonable prices around here. I work for an attorney who just moved from CA and she got twice as big a house for the same money. You can live in a nice middle class neighborhood and find prices for 4 bedroom homes in the 200's and 300's.

I have a dear friend who is a teacher of emotionally challenged high school kids, and she is my daughter's main tutor. If you moved here she could help you navigate through the system to get the kids what they need. Some of the schools here are great, some not so great.

The climate is awesome. It's in the 70's today. Winters are never cold but for a few days - and "cold" means highs less than 50!

There are LOTS of jobs here. Your husband might find a better job.

There are lots of homeschoolers around here and they have good networks. Might be a better option for your family.

You can live outside the city and have a "small town" feeling community [I do] but be close enough to take advantage of the great stuff to do in the city.

So please look into Atlanta. I will try to help as much as I can.

XOXOXOXX
Dee

[mcanvasback]

I cannot comment on NH except that although I spent the most wonderful summers of my life there - I would not think it would fit your needs as a family.

DET62 may have a good idea about GA! It is cheap, moderate climate and good resources. I am in FL and people are going to GA in droves.

And I loved your threat about the yurt - my dd is from Kyrgyzstan and may actually have been born in one - I will remember that for when she is a sassy teenager!

[pequele]

Doreen...
WY as in Wyoming...think state abrevs...she is wanting to find a new state to call home...just doens't look like she cares if it is in NE or not.

And if you are saying VT only has 1 major interstate...no way you have 2!!! 89 and 91!! haha. NH has a few more, I just still think it is such a pain to get anywhere because those roads never go where I wanna go haha. But yes it is beautiful here....except now when it is grey outside, my grass is dead and the trees have no leaves...and there is no snow in sight....waaahhhhhh

Actually just had my appraisal today. The lady said prices are still going up (slower than before but still headed up) in the Upper Valley...good news for me!

Originally Posted by DoreenG

First, I have no idea what WY stands for?

The state is tiny, so while there is only the one major interstate, it's not like it takes forever to get anywhere.