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#1
08-29-2005, 04:32 PM
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The Adoption Pregnancy Test
LOL, sorry JLyle got me going!
THE ADOPTION PREGNANCY TEST FINDING A TEST :When deciding what agency to obtain a test at, read small print clearly. Do not believe it when they say you will have a baby within 6 months. Also do not believe the test if it says for sure it can predict the sex. -Bring a lot of $$$ (take out a second mortgage if applicable) The test is not cheap, nor for the faint of heart. -For best results, it is best not to consume large amounts of alcohol before taking the AP test. It could affect your future decision making. & may come back to haunt you ( criminal background check) especially if you do this in public. -A wise course of action is to not tell your collegues at work, best friend's mom, carpool or especially your family, until you are sure of the final results.(see first point) -In several clinical cases it was also proven best, not to even tell your DH that you are taking the test. Turns out some men have a low threshold to watching their DW suffer severe symptoms of disappointment, shot down dreams & being misled & uninformed. -Due to the nature of this AP procedure, it may be necessary to perform multiple tests.Repeated testing may continue over an extended period of time. Be prepared to put your life on hold as you wait for said results. Do not plan to attend any important function, vacation, event, family reunion or sister's wedding during the testing period. Going to work during this time is permissible & even advisable, however, be aware of serious side effects occuring that may cause others to question your health & sanity. ( if this happens, simply pull out your notarized, appisealed, triplicate copy of the 8 doctor form, along with your current psyc report) Caution: DO NOT LEAVE HOME WITHOUT THIS! - TEST RESULTS MAY VERY, and may include, but are not limited to: -Sporadic, unnecessary, out of the blue, changes of actual arrival date. - Sudden changes in laws, requirements & general hoops, causing updated & costly paperwork along with intense panic attacks. -Physical ailments. Bouts of confusion, depression, anxiousness,overwhelm... a feeling of isolation, despair, fear of the unknown,upset stomach, marital strife & insomnia. Severe cases have been known to cause MUSHROOM-ITIS. A serious symptom related to the growth of large mushrooms that are kept in the dark & fed manure. READING YOUR TEST: When the line turns blue or sometimes red, this means you are indeed going to adopt soon. Congratulations! Sometimes one of the 6 lines on the test is known to turn lime green which deems the test invalid. Should you experience a shade of pale blue, this could mean you might be adopting soon . OR NOT. A hue of PURPLE dictates that there are changes, hold-ups & or general misinformation that may cause further undue delays. -DO NOT ATTEMPT TO READ BETWEEN THE LINES! This is best left to GOD Himself who is the only one who knows the actual end result. - Keeping a diary/blog of the used test, is a creative way to make the test a great souveigner when the process is done. DO NOT REUSE THE SAME TEST-results are only good for a few days & may change drastically. WARNING! Proceed with caution when sharing your test with others as their experience may radically differ! GOOD LUCK! RAIN
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NO REGRETS. 
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Russia Adoption Information
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#2
08-29-2005, 04:36 PM
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 Love It!
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SAHM to Twin Boys  Our Journey E A C H "It's not about the Gene Pool...It's about being bathed in love." - J. Hawkins Signed Aug 03--->"The Call" Dec 03 --->One trip region Feb 04--->Home Mar 04 (age 8 mo)--->Re-Adoption Completed Aug 04 Talking and hearing as of April 2008 (age 5)!  DS-G, age appropriate level (end of 2008). DS-L, age appropriate level (Oct 2009).Moved from  and were Ex-Pats/3 yrs in  xfer to  came through late, move in progress back to
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#3
08-29-2005, 05:12 PM
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you crack me up
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Emery adopted from St. Petersberg @15months old 2003 7 months start to finnish Emma from Samra adopted ara @17month old 2007 34 months start to finnish
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#4
08-29-2005, 05:14 PM
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You should publish!
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gabmom 3/04 Applied to agency 5/04 Homestudy completed & BCIS App sent 7/04 BCIS approval arrived 7/04 Dossier in Russia and translated 11/04 Received "the call" 12/04 Lost that child, family came forward 4/16/05 Leave for Russia !! 4/18/05 Met and fell in love with 10 mo. old boy waiting for 2nd trip...and waiting and waiting...and so on 8/26/05 Received word of mid-September COURT DATE!! 9/20 Gotcha!
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#5
08-29-2005, 05:18 PM
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thank you Rainy
What a laugh out loud hoot!!!
Do you do this stuff for a living? Karen
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#6
08-29-2005, 05:25 PM
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YOu are too funny Rain..keep them coming!!
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Mommy to Rachie,Vika & soon to an Estonian Prince 03/10/05 First home study meeting 03/14/05 Sent I-600 04/05/06 Fingerprints Appoinment 04/22/05 Home Visit - 3 PM 04/29/05 Home Study Aproval 05/26/05 Fingerprints 1 pm. 06/27/05 Sent for DH and DD Passport 07/12/05 Received I171-H 07/29/05 Received Passports 12/31/25 Switch Agency & Country 02/28/06 1st Trip to Estonia 05/03/06 Received Paperwork for Court to be notarized & apostilled. Sent back!! 07/29/06 Fingerprinted again 10/23/06 New I171H 12/20/2006 -- The news we have been waiting for ...WE GOT COURT for January 23, 2007!! 08/07/2007 - Went to Estonia to spend time with our son 08/12/2007 Dossier sent to Estonia Welcome Home Ruslan Ethan 01/10/2008  
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#7
08-29-2005, 05:42 PM
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Rainy - you crack me up as always - you should write a book..."adoption musings while you wait"...
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3/25/04 -sent in application to agency (adopting from St. Petersburg, Russia) 1/31/05 - We welcome a 14 mo. girl to our family!!!
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#8
08-29-2005, 06:47 PM
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I Love It!!
I agree, you should publish it. There are a few very creative parents on this board who could make money and amuse AP at the same time.
-Steffanie
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Steffanie 30 Brent 32 11/10/04: Applied to Agency 11/16/04: I-600A form sent 11/06/05: First apt. with Social Worker 01/10/05: Last apt. with Social Worker 02/09/05: Home Study complete 02/23/05: Dossier in Russia 3/15/05: Dossier in Kaliningrad 3/20/05: Received I-171 05/10/05: Agency lost accred. 1/27/06: Decided to switch to China 03/21/06: Paperwork finished for China 05/10/06: We are DTC!!!  5/19/06: LID - we are on our way http://www.youbelong.net/thedefrateses  
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#9
08-29-2005, 07:33 PM
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Rain, Rain - DON'T go away . . .
Always come back each and every day!!! Love your spirit - you really should write a book!! Lola
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Lola Adoption of Olya, from the region of Kursk, was granted on July 9, 2004 In the Supreme Court of the Russian Federation in Moscow Home at last on July 21, 2004 Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3:5-6
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#10
08-30-2005, 03:07 AM
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HA! 'nother good one Rain. Thanks!
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Karen Mom to Zack (4 year old bio) Sent in the application 2/15/05 GOTCHA! 11/22/05 Back at home 11/27/05 Welcome Katie!
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#11
08-30-2005, 04:07 AM
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OMG I'm still rolling on the floor!!!!!
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Home 4-17-04 with William Bryan, from Russia Deciding to adopt DD My Adoption Blog
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#12
08-30-2005, 06:37 AM
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You are too cute Girl! Love it!
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3/17/04 start 6/22 8/29 I-600 lost 11/17 H.S. Done 12/2 I-171 approval 12/6 Dossier Apostilled 12/16 OFFICIALLY WAITING 5/08 Waiting 146 days 6/4 to Russia 6/7 Met our Prince 9/4 Day 263 9/5 GOTCHA!!!!! 9/14/05 HOME FOREVER!!!! " I couldn't see how every sign pointed straight to you and every long lost dream lead me to where you are others who broke my heart they were just northern stars pointing me on my way into your loving arms this much I know is true....That God blessed the broken road and lead me straight to you, I think about the years I spent just passing through, I'd like to take the time I lost and give it back to you but you just smile and take my hand even then you understand that its all part of this grander plan that is coming true and every long lost dream lead me to where you are..."-SELAH
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#13
08-30-2005, 07:18 AM
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I wish I had just an ounce of your creativity Rainy!! pure brilliance. Thanks for the light relief.
MustangLippy
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#14
08-30-2005, 09:48 AM
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You are too funny...
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#15
08-30-2005, 10:53 AM
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Rainy - your positive spirit is so uplifting for everyone here! Your post made me laugh out loud!
- Maura 
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- Maura Erin's mom - bio born 2001 Daniel's mom - born 2004, adopted August 2005 from St. Petersburg
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