[chanibelle]

Hi everyone,
I was just wondering if you have adopted an African/CC Russian child or you know anyone who has? I was reading about a child who is African and Russian and it says in the bio that they may not get adopted in their country. I dont know much about the relationship between Russians and Blacks so could you tell me why this may be?

[Dobby]

Well, our son's birthfather was rumored to be from Tajikistan. This was explained in court by the social worker as the reason no one wanted to adopt him within Russia, and it seemed to be a very legitimate reason by the judge's standards.

My guess is there must be a bit of ethnic racism going on in Russia; that if Russians are going to adopt, they want a child that is "purely" Russian (as if there could be such a thing, historically!)?

Again, just my guess.

[kimber413]

I'm not sure it's African and Russian or just any other race besides caucasian. A lot of people go to Russia to adopt a caucasian baby, so that the baby looks more like it belongs in their family, otherwise they'd go to another country to adopt. And most likely Russians adopt caucasian babies for the same reason.

It's the same situation for Asian and Asian/Euro babies in Russia as well. They are less likely to be adopted than the purely caucasian ones. So, I'm not sure it's as much a relationship between the people as a preference of race/ethnicity for the make-up of their families.

Hopefully I'm making sense...

[Bcelli]

We adopted our purely Caucasian son at the ripe old age of 5.5 months in 1998 and he had already been declined by 5 Russian families. Why? Because he had a malformed hand.

Russians do not look at these types of issues - disabilities, biracial heritage, etc - the same as Americans do. As prejudiced as many Americans think our country is, there are many nations around the world who have far less tolerant attitudes about what they consider socially acceptable.

Despite that fact, one thing I particularly like about Russia is that when an adoption is finalized there - IT'S FINAL.

[sak9645]

... a group of judges from Russia once. They were touring the U.S. and learning about adoption and child welfare practices here

The judges, all women, were amazed at how open Americans are about their adoptions. They said that adoption is still stigmatized in Russia and that people don't generally talk about it.

They told me that it is still common, in many parts of the country, for a husband and wife to pretend that they are expecting a bio child, when they are actually adopting. The woman might put padding under her clothing, talk about morning sickness, and so on. Then she goes away for a while, and comes home with a baby, so that people think she just delivered. Obviously, in such cases, the adoptive parents are going to want a child who "looks like" them.

The judges also noted that, in Russia, it is still common for a couple NOT to tell a child that he/she had been adopted. Again, it's a lot easier not to tell, if the child resembles his/her parents.

The judges were first surprised and then delighted when I hauled out pictures of my daughter, who happens to be from China. They asked me lots of questions about whether she was accepted by others and such. Frankly, my daughter has always accepted, partly because we live in an area that is quite diverse. I doubt that many parts of Russia offer the sort of cultural diversity that is common in American cities like Washington, DC. Again, this probably influences Russian adoptive families to seek same-race children.

The judges stated that the thing that impressed them the most was how American adoptive families celebrated their children's culture. A lot of Russians oppose international adoption, they said, because they think that a child will lose his/her cultural identity. They were impressed with organizations, like FRUA, that help families raise children to be proud of their heritage.


Sharon

[chanibelle]

Wow, that's a great story Sharon. I didnt realize just how open we are about adoption in this country.

[sickmeig]

i think a child like this would be fairly unusual. after my two trips it did strike me that i didn't see one black person. this included the airport, moscow, and 8 hours to the north. maybe south of moscow there is more diversity, i don't know.

[malibu]

Hi All,

I'm new here. My husband and are are a mixed couple (I'm Black British and he's caucasian/white British) and hoping to adopt from Russia. We've chosen Eastern Europe as a number of other areas were not an option due to reasons such as length of marriage etc. I've just read the postings on this topic after doing an internet search for information on this subject and was very pleased to find it. We are concerned that once we finally get through all the required paperwork and be so close to adopting our child our application may be denied/turned down by the judge due to us being a mixed couple. Does anyone have any views on this? We are sincerely hoping that this is not the case of course but always have to view it as a possibility. We are about to meet with the agency (next week) when we will raise the subject. However, we are not sure how honest the agency will be when asked about this.

Hope to hear from you regarding this.

Ivanna

[Animalcrackers]

Ivanna,

I am Hispanic and my husband is caucasian. It was stated in our homestudy and is very obvious for others to see that we are of different ethnicities. We had no problems at all adopting. In fact, our son is Roma and looks like he could absolutely be our bio child. The judge was very happy that we chose to adopt him because he would have had a slim chance of being adopted based on his ethnicity and even they (the judge, social worker and the prosocuter) kept commenting on how closely he resembles us.

Melissa

[DET62]

I have been to Russia twice now and spent about 3 weeks there, partly in Moscow and partly in Khabarovsk. The entire time I've been in Russia I've only seen ONE black person. She was a Baptist missionary sent to Khabarovsk -she said from her 2 years' observation that there are almost no black people in Russia. It's a very caucasian culture.

I agree with the previous post, the children who are Roma [a/k/a "gypsey"] or Asian or mixed race have very little chance of getting adopted by a Russian family. There is a definite prejudice there.

I also have heard there is a real cultural bias against adoption. I have done a lot of reading, and from several several different sources I've heard about this bias. It's very sad. Orphans are viewed as second-class. There is a fascinating about Russian orphans in the latest edition of Russian Life magazine. I bet FRUA has some information on this topic too.

Russian also has a strange sort of bias towards women. Women are allowed to work at any job they choose, I believe, but very few Russian women know how to drive a car.

If you look at cultural biases worldwide, the Russians are pretty typical. There is a definite anti-female bias in Asian, Arab, and African cultures. That's changing, but very slowly, from what I read. That's why Chinese female babies are so commonly adopted - families only want boys. Boys are valued more highly than girls all over the world, the exceptions being Western Europe and the US.

I personally think America is far more enlightened than any other country in the world. We still have prejudice, of course, but I would not want to live anywhere else.

Just my 2 cents...

Dee

[ahnasmom]

Ivanna-

When we were at the Embassy in March of this year I was speaking with a mixed race couple...she was black, he was white, and they were adopting the most precious 5.5 month old extremely fair little girl. So I would say GO FOR IT!!!

[1moretime]

My son came over as part of a host program. Although I was not involved with the group that hosted (my son was not adopted by his host family, God waited for me to be ready) I did notice a black child in the group. When I commented to a mother who was involved in the group about this child she stated that the orphanage workers predicted a very tough life for her because of the racism she would experience. Fortunately, she was adopted here.

My son's first experience with a black person was very racist and I had a lot of explaining to do to let him know that people are all people no matter what their skin color is.

By the way, I was only in Russia for 1 week but we spent 3 days walking the very busy and crowded streets of Moscow and in a big city such as that we saw only 1 person of color. We did see some people of asian decent but only one black person.

[malibu]

Thank you all so very much for your input. It's good to know that we are not venturing into the completely unknown. We are rather anxious about this part of the adoption (as if the whole thing weren't stressful enough). We're still trying to make the first step infact. Being from a multiracial society can often lead one to forget that not all societies/cultures have the same views. I have a very close Russian friend and he too has said that the Russians, as a race are very racist. Infact, I recall going out to lunch with him in NY in a predominantly Russian district of the city. We were stared at constantly! We actually found it amuzing and I did not feel at all threatened. But perhaps my feelings were so as I knew that firstly, I was in the company of a very dear friend. And secondly, I was aware that beyond the confines of their district (to which they had brought all their narrow minded views) we were in a city and indeed a country which for the mostpart did not tolerate or support such thoughts.

With that said, I think we will continue to look into adoption from Russia.

Thanks again

[chanibelle]

I cant remember when I posted this,but my dh is white and I am AA and we adopted a beautiful baby from Russia. Of course we were stared at like we were from Mars,but the people we met were very nice to us and our adoption went very well. At the court hearing, our interpreter told the judge that no one wanted this child b/c of his skin. He looks white to me,but I guess he's a little olive skinned. Who cares? He's the cutest kid ever and people stop us all the time to tell us what a beautiful child he is.( gush gush)
I think if your heart is set on Russia you should do it. I would like to adopt again,but boy the paperwork is so challenging! I love my little guy and am blessed to be his mama.

[amyfk]

We are both caucasian(Jewish) and we found out on trip one that our daughter was born of a Roma/Gypsy mother. She looks caucasian to me, but is of olive skin. Yet I get remarks that she resembles me because I have dark hair/eyes like she does. I have also heard through the grapevine that Roma children have a rough time being adopted in Russia. Our child is home and is doing wonderfully well and is loved on all sides of the family. We couldnt be happier.

Amy K, NJ