[AMom2Two]

I sent my dd bmom a picture of the children sitting on Santa's lap in a Christmas picture frame for Christmas.

This morning I got a call from dd bmom telling me how much I brighten up her holiday. She said she loves the picture and she has them all lined up on her bedroom window sill with a candle. She has 4 years worth to look at and she feels so blessed to have such a tragic situation for her, turn into such a blessing.

She told me that when she came to this crossroad, when I realized that I had to place my little girl, that I screwed things up again, I really hated myself! I thought I was loser to be close to 40 years old and have to place my baby. I felt as if God was angry with me and I had to place my child because of MY problems.

Now 5 years later, I see his big plan. I see how much that little girl is loved. I see how much joy she brings into your family. I see now that I needed to work on myself and God had her in his little hands all the time. I see now that our paths, (yours and mine) were meant to cross and I feel so blessed that God helped me chose you and your dh and I feel doubly blessed that my son get to see her grow up and I get to witness how much joy she brings to everyone.

I want you to know this year XX, that I am not sad any longer because I couldn't parent her. I am happy that God used her to bring us together.

Thank you XX, for being my friend, for having an open heart and for the wonderful Christmas presents you give to us each year. It shows me how much you value me and how much I mean to your family.

I know another woman who placed her son and never hears a thing. I'll be going over there today to be with her for a while because the holidays are always hard for her, she never did have another child and her husband doesn't understand why this still bothers her, 10 years later. This also reminds me of just how blessed I really am.


MERRY CHRISTMAS.....

[billysmommy]

..............tears rolling down my cheeks. What beautiful words from an obvioulsy beautiful woman! Your DD (and you) are blessed to have her in your life.