[March]

We are in a very open adoption awaiting finalization. The birthparents and us came up with a communication/contact agreement stating how often visits would be etc.

In the agreement we say if either party moves more then 2 hours away visits would be twice a year. My question is if birthmom moves VERY far away would she need to come here to visit baby or do we have to fly there??

How do you work that out?? We are currently all living in the same small town.

Thanks for any input!

March
I am adopted

3 biological sons
1 daughter (9 mo.) awaiting finalization

[BrandyHagz]

I would think it would be something you would work out together.

We do it about 50/50 - they come here (and stay with us in our home) or we go there (and stay with them in their home).

Either way, three people travel...so there is no financial motivation for me traveling to them or them traveling to me...

We also don't have any 'set' visit outline...

[SchmennaLeigh]

We live 800 miles apart. (Between 6-8 hour drive depending on who is driving, traffic and seasonal weather.)

We have four visits per year which are basically split. For two, we go there. For two, they come here. It has been more or less for a party, depending on what the plans were (for example, they have better vacationing spots in their direction so we had an extra trip out East this summer). Obviously, they don't pay our way. We handle all of that ourselves whether we fly or drive.

[mommy2jillian]

We live 2 hours away from our daughters birthmother and we honestly just play it by ear on how often we visit usually twice a year. I would say as for the travel expense just alternate who pays. I realize this might be hard for her but if you pay one year she can possibly save for the following year. I hope this helps and CONGRATS on that beautiful baby! Cindy

[Free_to_be_me]

I moved 3000 miles away from my birthdaughter and her family. Most of my extended family still lives in the state she lives in so I am generally the one who makes the trip. I moved over 5 years ago and I make the trip at least twice a year. I am not concerned about the cost of the trip because 1) I would be making the trip to see the rest of the family anyways and 2) I am the one who moved this ridiculous distance. What was I thinking?

My birthdaughter and her dad made the trip to see me once a couple years ago. I would love it if they came to visit again someday and hope her entire family can make it. They have said that they plan to sometime in the future...

[sanielsen]

Have you asked your birthmom how she sees things? Maybe she's already worked it out in her head.
Good luck!
Sarah