[momof4kids]

I am new and am looking for some advice....
I was contacted by the CW last May about placement for a family members children. We were found during the relative search. we are not blood related to the children,but related by marraige. We have completed our homestudy and the kids are free for adoption. But now the CW is saying we are NOT relatives,because we are not blood related to the children. I am so confused. How can we be family one minute and not the next. The kids should have been placed with us months ago. Does anyone know if being related by marragie makes you a family member. We have phone contact with the kids,foster family,doctors,etc. We feel like with the way families are made up these days blood should not matter. We can provide a safe loving home for the children with close ties to their blood family. Any thoughts on this subject would be great.

[karla-k]

Is there another blood relative contesting for custody? that is screwy that they would call you b/c you are "family" and then deny you b/c you are not family. Do you have a lawyer? Would you fight for the kids?

[MommaKatja]

I don't know the specifics of this particular case but in some instances a case will hit bumps when the state or agency redefines family either through new laws or new policies or even through a new boss who interprets the same policies differently. Some of the redefinitions have to do with how strongly non-blood persons are considered family whether it be because they are family through marriage or "fictive kin".

For instance boss 1 may interpret the family as a first choice policy as meaning blood relatives and family by marriage. That person then leave the job for whatever reason and 2nd boss says the policy means any family member either by blood, marriage, or fictive kin then that person moves on and Boss three comes in and says only blood relatives are the first choice.

[Mom2J]

Okay, I know that with our case, we are family by marriage not by blood. There are several different factors at play here.

1. For federal programs, they only recognize family as long as it's within 5- degrees- married or blood. Now, to figure that out, is to count from you to your parents (your mom or dad whichever is related), to your grandparents, to your great-uncle, to his child, to his grandchild.......... each of those is a degree.

2. I have heard that if you call yourself family, hold yourself out as family, you're family.

Most state laws will even say, "whether family is by blood or marriage".

My advice is if you want to raise those children and keep them in the family, then fight with everything you have. Hire an awesome attorney, that can navigate the system. Don't give up if that's what you think is best.

Mom2J

[Hadley2]

You absolutely have to look at your state's specific laws to get on even ground when discussing with a cw. THEN, if needed, you need to understand that any agency can always go further than the law mandates if it is in the best interest of the child--that is, if the law requires that AT LEAST these people with a relationship to the child be considered, then more may be as long as it doesn't conflict with another mandated interest.

The cw is reading a restriction against more distantly related kin where there is none and her reading conflicts with the spirit of the law, which is to honor the child's right to identity and family of origin.... Her director, if budget-conscious, will see that immediately because if they don't place with you, they will be wasting another expensive-to-develop and hard-to-find adoptive resource on a child that has family willing to take him/her. Be ready to go over her head to someone who has more sense if she continues to sing this tune.

Check State Statutes

for various topics in CA child-welfare law. Here is one thing that might help:

California

Relative Placement for Foster Care and Guardianship
Citation: Welf. & Inst. Code § 361.3

In any case in which a child is removed from the physical custody of his or her parents pursuant to § 361,
preferential consideration shall be given to a request by a relative of the child for placement of the child with the
relative.
For purposes of this section:

•

‘’Preferential consideration’’ means that the relative seeking placement shall be the first placement to be
considered and investigated.

•

‘’Relative’’ means an adult who is related to the child by blood, adoption, or affinity within the fifth degree of
kinship, including stepparents, stepsiblings, and all relatives whose status is preceded by the words ‘’great,’’
‘’great-great,’’ or ‘’grand,’’ or the spouse of any of these persons even if the marriage was terminated by
death or dissolution. However, only the following relatives shall be given preferential consideration for the
placement of the child: an adult who is a grandparent, aunt, uncle, or sibling.

[Hadley2]

Here is more:

Requirements for Placement with Relatives
Citation: Welf. & Inst. Code §§ 309(d); 361.3

In determining whether placement with a relative is appropriate, the county social worker and court shall consider
the following factors:

•

The best interests of the child, including special physical, psychological, educational, medical, or emotional
needs

•

The wishes of the parent, relative, and child, if appropriate

•

Placement of siblings and half-siblings in the same home, if that placement is found to be in the best
interests of each of the children

•

The good moral character of the relative and any other adult living in the home, including whether any
individual residing in the home has a prior history of violent criminal acts or has been responsible for acts of
child abuse or neglect

•

The nature and duration of the relationship between the child and the relative and the relative’s desire to
care for and provide legal permanency for the child if reunification is unsuccessful
For a relative to be considered appropriate to receive placement of a child, the relative’s home shall first be
approved pursuant to the process and standards described in § 309(d). An assessment of the relative’s suitability
shall include:

•

An in-home inspection to assess the safety of the home and the ability of the relative to care for the child’s
needs

•

The results of a criminal records check

•

A check of allegations of prior child abuse or neglect concerning the relative and other adults in the home

Relatives Who May Adopt
Citation: Fam. Code § 8714.5

It is the intent of the legislature to expedite legal permanency for children who cannot return to their parents and to
remove barriers to adoption by relatives of children who are already in the dependency system or who are at risk of
entering the dependency system.
A relative desiring to adopt a child may, for that purpose, file a petition in the county in which the petitioner
resides. For purposes of this section, ‘’relative’’ means an adult who is related to the child or the child’s half-sibling
by blood or affinity, including all relatives whose status is preceded by the words ‘’step,’’ ‘’great,’’ ‘’great-great,’’ or
‘’grand,’’ or the spouse of any of these persons, even if the marriage was terminated by death or dissolution.

Requirements for Adoption by Relatives
Citation: Fam. Code §§ 8730; 8732

If the prospective adoptive parent of a child is a foster parent with whom the child has lived for a minimum of 6
months or a relative caregiver who has had an ongoing and significant relationship with the child, an assessment or
home study of the prospective adoptive parent may require only the following:

•

A criminal records check

•

A determination that the adoptive parent has sufficient financial stability to support the child and ensure that
any adoption assistance program payment or other government assistance to which the child is entitled is
used exclusively to meet the child’s needs

•

A determination that the adotpive parent has not abused or neglected the child while the child has been in
his or her care and will likely not abuse or neglect the child in the future

•

A determination that the adoptive parent can address racial and cultural issues that may affect the child’s
well-being

•

Interviews with the relative caregiver or foster parent, each individual residing in the home, and the child to
be adopted
A report of a medical examination of the foster parent or the relative caregiver shall be included in the assessment
of each applicant unless the department or licensed adoption agency determines that, based on other available
information, this report is unnecessary. The assessment shall require certification that the applicant and each adult
residing in the applicant’s home have received a test for communicable tuberculosis.

[momof4kids]

Thank you all for your advice.. i felt like I was going crazy with this whole thing.I always thought they wanted to place kids quickly,once they are free. It is so nice to have others out here for support. yes, we are willing to fight for the kids. They have come into our hearts,and we love them. How far over the CW's head can we go? Will that upset the CW and hurt our chances of getting the kids? No other blood family has steppped up,infact we are the only "family" that has come forward.

[Hadley2]

It's possible the cw considers that the children are attached to the fosters, if the fps want to adopt them. That may be true, too, and worth finding out about. It may be better for them, now, to leave them where they are. If they are looking for another home, however, or if the children have been there only about a year or so (depending on age), things are not so clear-cut. I hope you find answers, peace, and best situation for the kids.

[Lynard1210]

In Ohio, a nonrelative can request custody. Also if you go through the foster parent training, at least in Ohio, you are also going through the adoption training which certifies you for both. I would recomend you get to the training immediately and get certified. I would also get a lawyer since the kids are already in your care.

Once permament custody happens, the children are free to be adopted by you. Maybe the agency was trying to go legal custody to a relative and they realize that you are not a relative "by definition" . . .but in my opinion, it shouldn't matter . . . UNLESS there are other relatives who want the kids. The law says kids should be in the least restrctive environment which goes like this: family first, friends and foster care last. I would ask your CW if there is any other relative who wants the kids and if so, get a lawyer right away. You can also request a FAIR hearing at the agency (at least in Ohio) if you are unhappy with the way the agency is handlng the situation. Good luck!