[monique's mom]

I need some advice or resources. My husband and I adopted his sister's daughter. The mother was 15 when she got pregnant and was using marijuana during her preganancy. The sister and child came to live with us because they were living in a crack house with his aunt and the state was about to put them both in foster care. At the time my daughter (then niece) was 15 months old. Her mother has abandonment issues because her biological mother is schizophrenic and left her at the hospital and her father is unknown. She never bonded with her daughter from what we could tell. When she turned 18, she left her daughter with us and we got guardianship when she was 3. When she was 5, we legally adopted her. Now, she's having all types of issues, ADD, ODD, compulsive lying and nervous habits. I am having a difficult time dealing with her behavior. She's 9 now and I think she needs counseling but my husband thinks she's too young. Are there any good books that you could recommend? Has anyone had any similar experiences. The mother now lives in Indiana and we live in TN but she lived here for 1 1/2 about a year ago. Could our daughter be experiencing abandonment issues?

[Mom2J]

Hello Monique's mom,

I just saw your post and counseling is good even for children that can not speak. There's really not a too young issue.

Now, it's a bit late and I just walked in the door from work, so I'm going to do a bit of research and I'll try to get back with you tomorrow about a few avenues to try.

Have you also checked into FAS?

Mom2J

[Mom2J]

Hello Monique's mom,

I've thought long about this and my have some ideas for you. Counseling is an excellent way to help her if she is having abandonment issues. Have you gone to her pediatrician and had a complete physical? This probably should be another stop on the way to help your daughter discover what may be wrong. Also make an appointment with her school for evaluations. The school may see things, that you don't or visa-versa. All of these people will be excellent sources to help with diagnosing different issues with a child.

Mom2J