[janicebabb]

I am in the process of adopting my grandson. He will be 2 yrs old in November. My husband and I are hoping the adoption will be final in the next month or so. We have been trying to adopt him for about a year and we are closer now than we have been. It is hard starting over (we are both 47 yrs old) but it is worth it. We feel we can give him enough love and care to make up for not having his real parents raise him. His mother comes and sees him about every two weeks and we are trying to get his dad to see him on a regular basis. We have had to "child proof" our home again. Our daughters are 20 and 24. To all grandparents out there, if you are questioning whether you should adopt--go for it!!! There is no greater joy than having another little one give you hugs and wet kisses!!!!! Yes it is hard at times, but believe me it is worth it.

[picwick]

My husband and I, both in our late fifties, are starting all over again with our two grandchildren, ages 3 1/2 and 4 1/2. We have had them for over 3 years and just finally adopted them in June. DYFS was called in because my son and his significant other tested positive for coccaine. Our initial hopes were that the parents would get their act together, but after 3 years, DYFS went into ARC (Adoption Resource Center), and these two little munchkins had to be adopted. After this length of time, we could never give them up. Needless to say, this job is so much harder the second time around because of our age and my husband's health issues. I must admit, although I love them more than life itself, it is so difficult. They both fight constantly, rarely listen and I am hoping it is an age appropriate thing they are going through. Most of our friends have become casual acquaintances, now that we have little ones around. Our social life is next to nil, even though our oldest daughter comes to visit on week ends when we could go out. It would be so encouraging to know there are others in our shoes. Would certainly welcome any comments or suggestions from anyone. Thanks for reading this.

[sbritt3]

JUst to give you a different view and something to think about. My husband and I are in our fifties and have had emergency temporary custody of my grandson for 4 years. We actually have had him almost all of his life. He was 6 years old in September.
Now, Oct. 6, we have been notified by dcfs that there will be a court hearing, to give my grandson back to his mother. Right now she gets him 2 days a week. Enjoy every minute with your grandchildren, I wish so badly the court would let us have legal guardianship but their job is to unite the child with his mother. My son and exdaughterinlaw were both using drugs intravenously when we got emergency temporary custody. There is no way to describe the hurt I feel when they plan to take this child away from the only home he has ever known. Yes, it is hard work and sometimes frustrating to raise a child at our age, but believe me, I would give anything to keep this child. yes, I have given up alot of things to raise him, but the blessings outweight everything.
Be so thankful God has given you this chance to raise your grandchildren . I would give everything to keep mine. I don't understand the law. Thanks for listening,sbritt3

[sbritt3]

JUst to give you a different view and something to think about. My husband and I are in our fifties and have had emergency temporary custody of my grandson for 4 years. We actually have had him almost all of his life. He was 6 years old in September.
Now, Oct. 6, we have been notified by dcfs that there will be a court hearing, to give my grandson back to his mother. Right now she gets him 2 days a week. Enjoy every minute with your grandchildren, I wish so badly the court would let us have legal guardianship but their job is to unite the child with his mother. My son and exdaughterinlaw were both using drugs intravenously when we got emergency temporary custody. There is no way to describe the hurt I feel when they plan to take this child away from the only home he has ever known. Yes, it is hard work and sometimes frustrating to raise a child at our age, but believe me, I would give anything to keep this child. yes, I have given up alot of things to raise him, but the blessings outweight everything.
Be so thankful God has given you this chance to raise your grandchildren . I would give everything to keep mine. I don't understand the law. Thanks for listening,sbritt3

[Linda1627]

I have been raising my grandkids also..12-3-2...Had all 3 of these babies since birth..Were in our 50s also..The 3 yr old she lost her rights to and we adopted him..The 12 yr old he goes and stays with her for a few days and comes back..The courts are allowing her to work on getting the 2 yr old back in Oct..She is doing better but in my eyes she didnt want the other 2 so why give her the baby..With her drugs from the past the 3 yr old has ALOT of health issues..Chances are the baby will have problems also.She claims she will deal with it..haha....My guys are my life and I will do whatever it takes to keep them safe and give them a great life..It just amazes me how many there is of us out there doing this..I think we all need to get a room on here and vent..I know I need it at times...I have no social life..my friends are all out doing whatever while Im here doing this..Im alittle jealous I guess but my babies come 1st..Also Im a foster home and have kids come and go..Alot of kids and noise here..Everyone hang in there..These babies need us as much as we need them...Have a great day..

[grandmapatty]

hello, i recently posted, and read your story.. Me and my husban have had our 21 month old grandson since he was born, but luckily we did the foster care thing, and has him with us, now the parents finally signed their rights over (persuaded by the state, removal of rights were already being processed). We now are just waiting, but we have the support from dhs in our corner. We love him so much, as I am sure you love your grandchild. We are in our early 40,s and already worry a little about the health, and future.. but have to keep on. This forum has helped me see others in simular struggles.

[MamaTo6]

Hello Everyone...I am also a gramma....and the mom of 5 grown children. This is my story ....I was 39 yrs old and youngest dtr ( 17 when baby was born) found herself pregnant, and unable to parent. She tried for a few months while living in my home. Within 3 months it became apparent that being 17 and wanting to act 17 and do what teen agers do, just doesnt make for a good mommy. She moved out with baby and Soc. Ser. got involved. She messed up royally and a protection order was granted and my grd dtr was placed in my care. This woke my dtr up!! For 2 yrs she worked her butt off to take parenting classes, drug coucelling etc. In Oct.03, my dtr moved back into my home and parented her dtr for 6 months with my supervision. They both then moved to their own apt and have done extrememly well since then.

While my dtr was getting ready to move with her dtr, I was filled with mixed emotions. I had been raising my grd dtr since birth and loved her dearly. I knew she needed to be with her mom and that her mom could and would be a good parent...but oh boy was I gonna miss them both!! At the same time, I was ecstatic that I would finally be on my own. I was getting tired. I had a full time job that I loved. A boyfriend of 6 yrs that I couldn't wait to move in with, and after raising 5 bio children I wanted a break. I just wanted to be a gramma!!

The very month that my dtr and grd dtr moved out, I received a call that my sons girlfriend was in hospital about to deliver my grandson. As planned I attended the delivery. Soc. Ser removed the baby at birth due to moms past and previous parenting attempts that ended with her 1st child being taken and put up for adoption. I was devestated. Within the week I was in court fighting for temp. care of this new baby. It was granted and I brought this precious baby home. I don't have to tell you grammas how tired I was in the next few months. I continued to work full time and raise this beautiful lil guy. When this baby was 4 months old, the DNA test was done and I was not surprised to discover that this child was not my grand son. Mom had either lied or was mistaken. Soc. Ser petitioned to remove the baby to foster care, with the end result being adoption.

It took alot of thinking and planning, but I have just finished my home study and been approved for Teagans adoption. Court to terminate moms parental rights is end of this month.

Bmom and my son still live together. Because there is a no contact order btwn bmom and the baby, it makes it hard. My son was hurt to discover that baby was not his bio child, but only wants whatever is best for baby. Being with this younge lady means he will never parent any child they may have together. Its a choice he willingly makes. Its a choice that breaks my heart, but that I have to live with.

Teagan and I now live with my bf who loves Teagan as much as I do. I have since given up my full time job to be a wife and sahm. Im 43 yrs old with a one yr old son. My bio kids are 27,25, 22, 21, 20. I also have 5 grandkids older than my baby. Essentially my baby is their uncle, although we dont ask that they call him that. At first it was weird. My grown kids were a little jealous bc of all the time i took to care for Teagan. It took time away from my grd kids and I had been a very involved gramma, but hey, I was tired.LOL. Its been a year now and everybody has settled down. We have outings where my grown children bring their kids, and I bring my baby son. Everybody plays together and now we are together much more than we ever were. Its also fun for my adult kids to shock others by saying "oh no thats not my son, thats my brother."

Sorry this is so long...but I really wanted to share with those who would understand. Looking forward to meeting new friends and shareing the smiles and sadness that comes with our situations.(not to mention the frustration that our bio kids that have these children put us through)

Warm Wishes,,,,,Teagans Mama