[KATIEAO]

hello...my husband's father has 6 children in 3 different foster homes in IA, we are in MN and the home study approval for all six is on the way to ICPC...we feel that the county they are in may not want to give us all the kids now. they say the oldest, 11, says she doesnt care if she is with the siblings (she had the mother role and for the first time ever is being a kid) and the foster home may be interested in keeping her for "long term placement" the social worker told me she wouldnt be opposed to this if the 11 year old wants this- plus keeps telling us that the baby (who we would really want if we get the other 4-5 since our biodaughter is the same age,1) is doing so good in foster care and they are an adoptive option that the kids wouldnt be affected if not together and their bond is not very strong. this outrages us and we are so scared that they may have predetermined the outcome and we really want all kids to stay together and since we are family...does anyone know if we have legal ground to stand on so we can get some sleep??! We are in MN and they are in IA. Thank you for any advise or info!!

[mcdandw]

Giving the 11 year old a voice in the decision making is very normal and standard policy in most states.

I wouldn't be surprised if the other kids in between her and the baby also do this at a later date!

The baby's situation sounds either predetermined, or they are concerned for it's stability.