[scarlet52698]

Well I'm jumping into this hosting business feet first....LOL So I thought I'd start out by asking adoptive parents and birth parents what first crossed your mind when you received contact?

Did you fear the other person (fear of rejection)? Did you worry about making a good impression? Any other thoughts?

[scarlet52698]

When I wrote my first letter to my sons parents last year I was so nervous about making a good impression. I felt like as a birthmother I had a stereotype to dispell (completely my own expectation of what I thought they might think of me). I listed all the material and academic accomplishments I had achieved.

Since then we have begun to communicate directly (last year was through the agency). With that direct communication has come more openess on both sides which has been really amazing. I find myself wishing that we could have had this kind of relationship from the beginning.

[evildishrag]

This is the strangest relationship I have ever been in.

I was certainly concerned about making a good impression. Never in my life have I wanted so much to make a good impression and be liked. Plus I feared that I might not like him. In 'real life', I don't care at all about these kinds of things. If I don't like people it doesn't matter and if people don't like me, it doesn't matter. See ya!

But in this reunion with my bson, thankfully, I have managed to be entirely myself and it appears he has as well. We are getting along wonderfully and it's easy to talk to him now. I no longer stuggle to say the perfect things or write the perfect emails. It's all coming very easily now.

[scarlet52698]

That's my goal too, just to be myself and let the chips fall where they may.

I just got off the phone with my sons birthfather and he feels the same way. He is terrified of the reunion process but really wants to know our son.

[scarlet52698]

*bump* *bump*