[snoopie1424]

I am the wife of an adoptee who has been in reunion for almost 3 years. I was just wondering about how other spouses of adoptees have handled this. I've not really found that many to talk to, so I set up a blog for spouses of adoptees. Feel free to check it out.

Sue

Where Do We Fit In The Picture?

[Socrmom3]

I am the adoptee but my husband has been COMPLETELY supportive of me every step of the way. I had found my birthparents before he and I met but I had never contacted them. It is only with his love and support I felt the strength to face whatever happens.

Now we have reunited and my bdad is ill and my husband is considering leaving his job of 18 years so I can move home closer to my bfather (and 3 sisters!)so we can spend as much time together as we can.

Where do spouses fit? Right by our sides.

[snuffie]

I agree with socrmom3. My husband has been there to hold me when the frustration of searching was just too much and to rejoice with me when my search ended. He was right by my side when I met my bsibs for the first time. He was right there with me when I visited my bmom's grave for the first time and held me when I cried.

I know it is difficult for one who is not an adoptee to understand the emotional thing that search and reunion is. It is like getting up each morning and having a form of amnesia where you don't know who you are, whose traits you have inherited. And then in reunion, you finally have answers and see your mother's face staring back at you when you look in the mirror! It is indescribable!

Your husband may seem lost at times in his own thoughts and so consumed by reunion that it is hard to let anyone else in. In time, things do get back to "normal"only it is a much better "normal" than before!