[mama3veces]

I need advice from any of you who have children who molest. We adopted two bothers two years ago. They were 4 and 6 at that time, now 6 and 8. This past week the 6 year old told us that his brother has been molesting him during the time thay have lived with us. I am shocked and trying not to feel guilty. We knew that there had been some past incidences, but as you may know when we adopt older kids who have been in many placements,we seldom get the full information on our children. Thankfully we now have a GREAT therapist who has helped us through the past two weeks. The 6 year old will sleep on the couch until our 18 year old moves to the college dorms in a few months and can have his old room. And there is a motion sensor on the 8 year olds door. (I am still a little dazed over it all.)

I am hoping for some wisdom/hope/advice/encouragement from any of you who may also have children who have molested. Thanks!
This community has always been so helpful and supportive and already in just a few months I have learned so much from many of you. Thanks for anything you can offer.

mom to three dear boys

[mom2GRLC]

Well the good part is that your son was able to talk to you about it and that you are now working on the problem.

I'm sorry your little boys have been exposed to so much, they're lucky to have you in their life now and with therapy they will make it through just fine.

I'm sure the hardest part is to realize it's been going on in your home and you knew nothing about it and couldn't stop it. But you can't change the past. All you can do is work on the present and for the future.

Your doing a great job, keep your chin up!!!

[Tudu]

I have several children that are not safe with each other for even a few minutes. We have door alarms on the bedrooms and video monitors in the play areas so they are not alone. It seems evey time I have to use the restroom something happens. I have had to reevaluate how and when I do things like showers and the restroom so they do not have time alone. We have many rules in place - no blankets in the living room, no laying down and playing, no play in bedrooms, no hide and seek, and no less than 3 kids playing together.