[sadiegirl]

*raising hand*

Count me in on this too!

I take BC for my endo, plus I have 1/4 of an ovary left so the chances of getting pg are remote, to say the least. I don't even WANT to be pg (anymore, ever again, etc).

We've had 4 m/c's, a failed match and a contested adoption, all on our journey to DS. I am so burned by IF and now, ADOPTION, that DS will most likely be an only child.

Meanwhile, SIL is about to give birth to number SIX, all the while complaining how she HATES to be pg, they never have time for the kids they DO have, they're so tired, etc. etc.

It REALLY hurts! WHY keep having them then? It's just not fair.

I console myself with the fact that DS is lavished with attention and was/is VERY VERY wanted. I can tell you that while they may love their children just as much as we love DS, we APPRECIATE him, WAY more than they do their kids.

And hey, is it too much to ask for an instructional manual for men? My DH is the same way.

Thanks for letting me vent on your thread. :-)

[2manyks]

i get jealous of our emom's pg. how come she gets to be the pg one and not me?

i am grateful for my beautiful children, however they have come to me, and no - just because you want more children doesnt mean you dont love the ones you have.

[Bunnygirl]

Of course you feel sad & jealous! I have NEVER in my life met a woman who's had fertility problems or pregnancy losses who DIDN'T feel that way at least a tiny bit when finding out about another woman's pregnancy! Especially if that pregnancy/birth was easy to come by/unplanned etc.

Take it from me, I've had 3 miscarriages, a full-term stillbirth & lot's of fertility treatments & seem to be starting peri-menopause. I've just gotten a referral for a beautiful baby boy whom I've already "fallen in love with" & am totally excited about adopting. I don't even WANT to have to go through the anxiety of another pregnancy BUT I still get a twinge when I see how effortless it seems for some women. It was ages before I could handle pregnancy announcements from co-workers without running to the ladies room to cry & until my son is actually in my arms there's NO WAY I'll be going to any baby showers. It's not that I don't feel happy for other women (especially the ones who've really had to work at it) but not being able to bear a living child is just such a bitter loss that it's impossible to ignore.

Sorry, I didn't mean to ramble so much! In short, I think you're perfectly normal to feel the way you do & your husband needs to try & understand that the whole pregnancy thing is VERY different for a woman than for a man. Becoming a mother, biologically, is a really long, transformative & public process for a woman. Men generally don't grow up playing with "babies" (i.e. dolls) & "practicing" the way women do.