[Bug-n-Bears-Mommy]

This is a question I was asked the other night while I was working. Mind you, I am in a service industry and painted a smile on my face and assured them than my children DO get enough time with me!

I recently had to go back to work. (opposite the shift DH works because of daycare costs) I am in a position where I have to make small talk, and the topic of children came up. One of the people (no offense, but it was a man) asked me if I really thought my childrne were getting the attention they deserved since I am working. As though working parents don't feel bad enough as it is!

Mind you, I am with them during the day and DH is with them on the evenings I work. They are with a parent ALL the time. Golly gee, we even have time when ALL of us are together! It is just the way things work!! I know we are not the only couple in today's day and age who have to work things this way either.

I was just offended that someone would bring my parenting into question...thanks for letting me vent!

[Lynn226]

Think of a benefit that your child has that a child with a SAHP doesn't and reply with that next time. People can just be insensitive, sometimes.

[Lovebug]

Yep, tell 'em..."Well, my children are better of spending the time they do with me in our warm home that we would be spending 24 hrs outside if we were homeless" UGH! I am a SAHM, but come on...this is 2006...people HAVE to work to survive. It isn't 1942 anymore.

Hugs!

--Renee

[WLD]

Does he have kids? If so, ask him how's his doing without him?

[HappyTwinsMom]

I struggle with this question enough in my own mind, I certainly don't need some chauvinistic man questioning me.

Your children are blessed to be able to be with one or both parents all the time! I wish we were able to do that, as well.

And...why is it that everyone always wonders if the kids are getting enough time with MOM and no one ever questions DAD having enough time with the kids????

[Bug-n-Bears-Mommy]

Does he have kids? If so, ask him how's his doing without him?

He mantioned that he has 4 kids of his own. I work at a hotel and he was in town on business for the WEEK! Believe me, it was on the tip of mu tongue to ask him who was with HIS kids 24/7! I just really need my job too much to dare!

[McNally720]

Why are people SOOOO stupid?? I mean, really.

I think what did it for me was the fact that he was at the hotel for a week and has the audacity to ask YOU if YOUR children have enough parent time???

Obviously, this idiot was projecting his own guilt onto you. I have many inappropriate names to call him, but I'll settle for forum-appropriate DORK.

[kelceesmom]

You know that your child is loved and gives you love too. We all do what we have to to survive this day and age. Some people are still ignorant.

[pianolover83]

To put my two cents in here, my parents worked opposite shifts. My mom worked second, while my dad worked first shift. I still love the fact that my parents changed their shifts so my sister and I would not have to go to a babysitters. I really do agree that I had more time with my parents, I loved having time with mom during the day, while being with dad at night.

I think that guy had no idea what he was talking about and probably doesn't even know his kids.

Kudos to you, keep it up!

[dianamom4]

I am a SAHM of 4 wonderful children. My sister is a working mom of 2. She feels guilty that she can't be a SAHM, and I feel a little twinge now and then when I see the cool educational vacations and opportunities that she can give her kids that I can't give mine. I also worry that I can only TELL my daughters that women can have really cool careers, rather than being an example to them. It you spend one hour talking to/playing with your kids rather than eight hours letting the TV babysit them, you're ahead of the curve!
And either way there will always be someone more than happy to make you feel bad about yourself. I worked in a very high stress customer service environment for many years, and I discovered that some people will say anything to get under your skin- just for a reaction. Don't justify yourself to the jerks- they don't really matter anyway.

[Boulderbabe]

I'd be angry, too. That was a nasty comment from that guy. Did you ask him if his kids were getting enough time with him, since he was at work, too?

The idea that somehow women have a childcare burden that their husbands don't is b.s. in my book!