[Judilyn]

As many of you know I am the director of a large day care center. This week I had an interview with a mom who has a 3 week old baby. She is a good mom and had an older child enrolled with us previously. She needed to enroll the baby immediatly because her doctor had just released her to go back to work. At 3 weeks into her precious little daughter's new life! I could not believe it !! What ever happened to encouraging bonding??? This is a time when you should be resting with that new little someone sleeping right on your chest, not returning to work. But, her doctor told her that there was absolutly no reason why she could not return to work and being a single mom she really has no choice! I feel so bad for her! I hope that I can be supportive to her role as a mommy however we can not take the baby until she is 6 weeks old. What a JERK that doctor is!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks for listening!!

Judilyn

[dr. mom]

She may have asked the dr. to release her to go back to work. if her maternity leave was unpaid , she may have financially wanted to go back to work so soon. It is a tough situation

[Judilyn]

True it is a tough situation but if she had a choice I do not think this would have been it. Had she had a c-section there would be no option but to wait it out. I guess I am just very supportive of a newborns time with mom, it goes by sooooo very quickly. At three weeks of age the world still does not feel right after being in the perfect environment for 9 months, it takes time to adjust. IT just seems like we are rush chldren to grow up to fast now a days.

Judilyn

[onepurpletwin]

I understand how you feel that mom should stay home with baby, and I would bet money that mom wants to stay home with baby and would if she could...Now I am a single mom of two boy's and when I was pregnant with my second, I worked until I was overdue because I did not recieve any $$$ for maternity leave from my job, nor the state. I went back to work when my baby was one month old because I HAD to. I ran out of money, my bills were far behind, and I ran up my credit card to the limit buying groceries and diapers. I had no other choice but to return working way earlier than I had wished for. You might want to give her a little bit of credit...going back to work is probably a smart move for her so she can feed and clothe her children. Hope your day is better. Oh, one more thing...If you have children, you may tell yourself you are doing good by having a daycare and keeping your children with you. You are still a working mother even with your children there...whil working a daycare, your attention is not on your own children, but on all of the little ones you care for. God Bless, onepurpletwin.

[dr. mom]

my wording was poor, I meant she may have financially NEEDE to go back to work-- not wanted to

[Sharon]

I am a two-year-old teacher in a large daycare center and I am also saddened by the amount of time infants spend in the care of paid workers. In my state, we can't take them until at least six weeks of age... but I worry about infants' ability to bond with their parents under these conditions. Many babies spend all their waking hours in our center, only going home to sleep at night. Some arrive at 6:30 in the morning and are picked up at closing time, 6:00 at night.
I am in no way blaming the parents... many are single mothers, and are compelled by financial necessity to return to work as soon as possible. I blame our society for creating a situation in which mothers have little or no free time to spend interacting with their children. The center I work at is first rate... but paid care will NEVER, in my opinion, be an acceptable substitute for mother/ child bonding. I love my job but wish there was some alternative for these women and their babies.
~ Sharon

[Judilyn]

OnePurpleTwin,

Oh I do give her credit for going back to work so soon. My heart goes out to her, it is not easy to be where she is. No family, no spouse or significant other, no where to turn. And now I can not help her because the state says the baby must be 6 weeks old to begin day care. If given the choice I am sure she would choose to be at home. BUT, she did not ask to be relased to go back to work, she was emotional (understandable after having a baby) and was telling the doctor how she is having a hard time coping. So, here is the support she got, Oh well ,go back to work, here is your bill, so long. When I was going through post partum blues my doctor sat down and talked with me and reassured me that everything was going to work out OK (My oldest was born 6 weeks early and had some complications so I was very emotional)

OH and by the way.........
I have always been a working mother Every mom is a working mom. The day care where I work is not in my home. We have 155 children enrolled in our center. I did not choose my career according to my child's needs but being able to have them around is an added plus. My children are 16, 13 and 8 the oldest two are not with me at work, the yougest is. (and during the school year my middle child is because he attends the school upstairs) And while I may not have all my attention focused on her,(I have 18 full time staff, many parents, health department, fire marshall ,and DCFS to deal with) I still get to see her often throughout the day. She runs in my office every chance she gets to throw her little arms around me and say HI MOM! I would not change that for anything. I feel that I have the best of both worlds, a great job that I enjoy in which I can include my children. How many other moms can say that they work outside the home all day long and still have that kind of contact. My 2 older children volunteer on a regualr basis and their experience has taught them to be great with children. I don't have to celebrate "Take Your Daughter to Work Day" once a year because I get the honor all the time!

Judilyn

[Judilyn]

Thank you Sharon, I did not know what you did for a living, that is great! I call it "loving for a living". I have so much respect for all of the teachers at our center but to our toddlers and two year old teachers I tip my hat! It really takes a special person to spend your whole day in a room full of 2 year olds!!

And yes I agree, I am often saddened by the amount of time children must spend in day care. We are open from 6:30AM to 5:30PM and oftenwe have children who are there all day long.For the most part I agree that it is not the parents the parents fault but we do have a few mom's who send their child to day care everyday even if they are off or on vacation. Just this past 4th of July I had a parent comment that she wished we were open for the Holiday so that she could go to a party.

Our center is first rate also but we can never replace a parent. We have an outstanding infant room and staff. Yet I would have not chosen a day care center for my infant, the ratio in our state is 4 to 1, we have a 3 to 1 ratio in our center because we participate in a Volunteer grandparent program. It is a sad situation yet if day care providers closed their doors tomorrow where would working parents be?

God Bless
Judilyn

[nancynic]

Hi,

I am so grateful to child care professionals! My children were in child care and now they are adult men ... confident, bright, sociable, friendly and adventurous! They entered child care facilities near the ages of one year and as they grew, they were able to enter social and educational experiences with confidence that came from being in groups of children and adults.

I appreciate the professionals who care for children ... and do believe it takes a community to raise children.

thanks for all that you do to make the world a better place!

NancyNic

[Judilyn]

Nancynic,

Thank you

I am taking this to work to hang up in the teachers lounge.
They enjoy little things like this. It is very encouraging for them.

Judilyn

[Jensboys]

Well I agree with all of you and feel so very VERY grateful that I have the opportunity to be at home with my kids but I do have a suggestion for you all ...

Move to Canada. Here, employed women are entitled to 50 weeks PAID leave (by govt.) after having a baby. Yep almost a year ... it used to be 6 months but the experts thought it wasnt enough time for bonding ... In the case of an adoption ... the birth mom is still entitled to 15 weeks paid leave and the adopting mom is entitled to 35 weeks paid leave. Oh and the leave can be taken by either parent ... what they are finding is that often mom and dad split the time. Also, of course, our medical is also covered by the government.

[nicolebrooks]

My business partner brought her baby in to work. Granted she (the baby) was a distraction but a wonderful one at that. Having her around was such a wonderful blessing to our work place, we laughed more and overall the mood was much more positive.

We found that the "johnny jump up" with a mirror in front of her and the automatic swinging chair were hours of self entertainment and sleep. Around the 3rd(?) month we had a nanny come in as well to manage feedings and the such (peeeeeeU).

[Judilyn]

WOW, a thumbs up to Canada for supporting new moms and babies. Just curious, are all Canada's day care centers goverment funded?

And also I think it is great if you have a job that will allow you to have your infant with you but that does not happen too often. We do have a mom at our center who had that option and took it until her little guy stated crawling then she enrolled him with us. She still keeps him with her when he is sick. Allowing her to have him at work made it easier to keep up with breastfeeding.

Judilyn

[onepurpletwin]

Yes, breatfeeding is important, but a lot of moms give up when a child is enrolled into daycare...I think (and know from experience) that it is important to keep breastfeeding your baby for the first year, especially if they're in daycare. I believe it makes a stronger bond than bottle feeding...it is a lot of pumping and preparing to continue breastfeeding a baby in daycare, but it is really worth it!

WOW! Canada is amazing! They sure do have a clue! Now if only everywhere else would get a clue...they just don't want to fork out the money to the mothers. That's just too bad
Well, happy day to all!

[nicolebrooks]

You mean they crawl! Just kidding We actually just had her in the office when she couldn't crawl (I think for about 8months?). Granted, our situation was extremely unique, we are a tight LLC, only 4 of us.

GO SMALL BUSINESS
SUPPORT SMALL BUSINESS- get it tee hee