[alicia hunter]

Hello everyone. My daughter, 3 years old, is an only child for the second time now since the fosterbaby went home. She seems so bored all of the time and eventhough she has a dog for a playmate never seems satisfied to play alone. We are waiting for a newborn, but it will be a while before the baby would be old enough for her to play with. I was wanting to start scheduling some playdates for her with kids from her preschool class, but have not had a very good response from parents. Are playdates out of style now? All of the moms I have talked with just seem to have no time for such things, but the children have so much fun together at school. Am I just out of it or are they just too busy? What do your children do to socialize?
thanks!!!

[bumpkin]

I ran into this alos. Especially because I was a working Mom. I tried a couple of things. Networking in my neighborhood. Also I went to the local playground alot (we moved when ason was 3 so I didn't know a soul) if we met a child around my sons age and they seemed to get along I tried to talk to the Mom and see if she came to the playground alot, was it usually at this time etc.... then I tried to go at those times if I could. They would blossom into playmates and I'd have the Mom to my house afterwards for a snack or something. I have to admit that they didn't turn into life long friendships - but for a warm season my son had some interaction and we still see them around town and I chat with the Moms. Eventually we plugged into the children in the neighborhood and that helped.

Good luck - socializing single kids can be work!

Bumpkin

[Judilyn]

When my oldest was an only child we did "play dates or play groups"also. At the time we were all stay at home moms so I can see where it was easier to schedule in the time. I can also see where it may be diffu=icult to add one more item to an already over-stretched schedule.

Our play group was actually started from a group of moms that I met at childrens story hour at the local library. You may want to give that a try.

IF you can't interest moms to come withheir child how about inviting a friend over to play with just your daughter? You could even due a lunch date at a local Mc Donalds. IT would be a start.

I loved my daughters play group time. It was a relaxing time for us moms and a great time of making friends for the kids. Good luck, keeping trying, it's worth effort.

[shirleyh]

Alicia,

I can understand your plite. Although my son is 10, he is still the only child. When he was younger (not in Elem. school yet) I found that people that I socialized with was a lot easier to plan play times with their kids. But I have to say that I was very lucky to basically have the "brady bunch" living across the street. They had 5 girls and 1 boy, and there were different kids over all the time, which I just love. As he started Elem school and I did a lot of volunteering on school projects and being class mother, I was able to get to know the childrens parents, so it made it much easier to plan play times and sleep overs.
I don't know if any of this helped you any, but maybe you will give you some ideas.
I doubt very much that it is you, I think it is probably them. When you come in contact with them they have their minds on the things they need to do, or hurrying to work. Just keep striking up those conversations with them, looking for things you have in common, and I'm sure they once they know you better they will be more receptive.
Let us know how it goes!

[AlexasMom]

My daughter is a bit younger...but I have run into the same thing here. Seems like everyone is just "so busy" - or they don't parent "only kids" and so their children already have "built in" playmates. Where we live, there is a state funded program called "Early Childhood Family Education" - which is a program where they run "mommy and me" classes for ages birth through age 5. I take my daughter to these (she is 19 months old) at least once a week. And, even though it really doesn't provide the "one on one" interaction that a "play date" does...it, at least, exposes her to other kids and different activites.

Do you have any family members with younger kids? Even though our daughter is only 19 months old, we still have her 5 and 9 year old cousins over for the night, sometimes....just, to continue to expose her to other kids - and give her a change of pace.

Good luck....I know it can be hard for our "only kids!"

[alicia hunter]

She is the only kid in the wohle family. She does get plenty of time in large groups at daycare since I am a single mom and have to work. I am thinking that we are just going to have to give up on the idea of one-on-one playdates. She has a very good friend at "school" but her mom is just too busy.

Thankyou everyone for your input.