[Champion1]

My husband and I have recently learned about an older sibling group of 2 that is available for adoption in our state. We are very interested in trying to adopt them. However, we are concerned that we will not be considered eligible because we have only been married for 7 months. My husband and I are already in our mid 40's. So, we don't want to wait years before we start trying to create our family through adoption.

Can anyone tell me if the length of time that we have been married will restrict us from being considered; or will they give us special consideration since we are trying to adopt children who are harder to place?

[Linny]

I would guess that each state is different.....but my assumption would be that your time in marriage will affect the choice of where these kids will be placed. I know that may not seem very fair; but it would also need to be considered that children from the system present a lot of issues that require a very tried and true force to 'reckon with'. Please don't misunderstand me.....I suspect that you and your husband may, in fact, have that strong force between you-----but overall, the system may not see it that way.
Adoption of older children is a tough road, at best. Being newly married, combined with the manipulations and possible triangulations some of these kids present, is tough on any marriage, let alone a new one.
Best of luck to you though. As I said, every state is different.....and there is always the chance that other reasons may make the system take a closer look at your situation and you'd have a chance to have them!

Sincerely,

Linny

[domesticgodess]

I dont have a clue how they would look at it but I agree that they may possibly consider that. I have eard you have to go thru so much paper work and home checks ect b4 getting one anyway that they may indeed look at that too-
who knows-

Best of luck to you-

[HBV]

We had an issue with that because by the time we'd been married as long as our agency required, I would have been bumping up against the age limit for an infant, which was what we wanted. We got around it by asking our priest to write a letter on our behalf. He'd done our premarital counseling, knows us well, and was happy to help.

I bet they'll be willing to waive it with some showing of support for your marital stability. You might think about whether there someone in your lives ---a counselor, a close friend, your priest/pastor who could write a similar kind of recommendation letter.

[mumofone]

I think most agencies would like to see a marriage of at least 2 years, but, every agency is different, and there are always exceptions to every rule.