[ILoveDisney_Mn]

Hello! My name is Megan, I've posted this story/discussion thing today because it's something that has been really bugging me the past couple months.

A little background on my self. I am 19, currently living in Saint Paul, Mn. I have four siblings all of which are adopted. I've known my whole life about them, I have received pictures of them a couple years and a few letters updating me and my family about how they were doing. I am the oldest of my mothers 5 children. My mother, who through a series of unfortunate events lost me, and I was put in foster care. My mother really did not want me in foster care, so she asked my grandmother if she would take me for 3 months. Well little did my mother or my grandmother know at that time, that the 3 months would turn into 18 years, but enough about me, lets move on.... My two sisters Justina (17) and Jasmine (15) were adopted by a very nice couple, I believe in 94 or 95. My family was adamant on getting the two of them adopted together, we didn't want to break them up in fear we would lose contact with one of them. Thankfully, we finally found a couple who was willing to adopt both of them . My mother continued to do drugs and not make the best decisions so she left about 94ish. Then in 1996 came back home. ugh. She met a new guy, Kevin. ew ok. Anywho's they got married...and in Jan 97 I got a baby brother! And again in 99. I loved those boys! I was there big sister. Then in 2000, everything went to hell. Kevin and Mom got in a fight, Kevin leaves, Mom leaves, boy's are taken away sent to foster home. Kevin is unable to take care of the boys and so is mom, so now the boys are put up for adoption. Unfortunetly, no one in my family is able to take the boys in. Once again my family is adamant on getting them adopted together. Months go by, I visisted my brothers once at there foster home with my Aunt. They were so big! And then finally we get the call the've been adopted! And guess what!! Drum roll please!........................................... .....

By the same couple who adopted my sisters!!!!!!!!!

There are not words to explain how excited I was, now I know that whenever I do see them again their all together.

I don't know if my brothers and sisters know I am out here, after all they were very young when they left. But what I do know is that I miss them EVERYDAY. My family love's those kids, and my only wish is that my grandma gets to see them again before she dies (which hopefully isn't for a LONG time).

On Nov. 22 of this year my oldest sister, Justina will be turning 18. Yay!. This mean she can legally, look for her birth family if she wants to.

I guess one thing I've been wondering, is that whenever you're reading about adoption, there's often a lot of stuff for the adopting parents (duh) and birth parents (another duh) but what about the Birth siblings or in my case sibling.

My brothers and sister grew up together, they know each other. They already consider themselves brother and sister. And then there's me. Sometime's I almost feel like I am the one who was adopted. (Does any of that make sense???) Ughh, I dont know maybe I am making no sense.

Well thank you for reading my very long post. You are very brave!

Megan

[mommy2fiveplus]

I have adopted through foster care twice now, I can only speak for myself, but I have a feeling other foster/adopt parents out there probably feel this way too: I would love to welcome a relationship between the children I have adopted and thier birth siblings. If I know about them ahead of time I have always done whatever I could to let them keep contact and I hope to help my adopted kids find any healthy (emotionally) bio family they can when they are older.

I hope that you are able to reconnect with them and I too am glad they were kept together, I just wish you had not lost contact with them.

[djvj]

megan,
yes, your post made perfect sense, and i think it is a great topic to explore on these forums. i can understand that it must be really strange to know that your 4 siblings are adopted and know each other, but do not know you.

adoption is something that affects all kinds of family members and friends, and those emotions you are speaking of are very real and you have every right to your feelings. may i suggest that you attempt to contact the family who adopted your siblings and tell them you would love to have contact? a lot of years have gone by since the first adoption, things have changed quite a bit, and they might be really happy to include you in your little brother's lives as they grow up. it can't hurt to ask...

good luck on reuniting with your sisters and keep us posted!

[Jensboys]

Hey Megan -- I adopted a sib group of 2 boys 9 years ago, and they have an older brother and 4 younger sisters being parented by their biological family members.

I took my oldest son (he's 13) back to meet his brothers/sisters in July of this year (our second son - age 12 - wasn't ready yet).

Anyways, all that to say that YES my sons are interested in their siblings. They want to know about them, and I would bet, especially seeing as the adoptive parents also adopted the boys, that they have shared with them about their older sister. Maybe they have pictures, or a name? Were your brothers old enough to have memories of you?

Anyways, I would encourage you to reach out to them - maybe through the agency that placed them? The social worker? Especially now that you are a stable adult, they might be willing to help you facilitate a relationship with ALL the kids. Its worth a try.

If you are interested in reading how things went for us ... read the July portion of my blog (link below). It was hard at times -- but the sibling bond was undeniable. Maybe it will give you some insight.

Jen