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Originally Posted By Susan Smith

What resources are available for me if I'm considering placing baby for adoption, but have no interest at all in turning my baby over to someone I have never met? This is a really hard decision to choose adoption, and I don't know that I could sleep at night if I didn't know my baby was going to a good home.

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Take your time with your decision. Do not feel you have to make any decision immediately. There are closed adoption, and different levels of openness in adoption today. Right now there are a far greater number of people wanting to adopt than babies that are placed for adoption, so you have a great amount of say in who the adoptive parents will be. Remember you can always change your mind about the parents or whether you want to adopt until the adoption is finalized. You cannot relinquish your rights before the baby is born, which is a good thing. Different states have different laws. You can go through an agency or private lawyer. Check into your legal rights. Some states will allow the birthparents to pay for an attorney to represent your interest, seperate from the one facilitating the adoption. Look into counseling. Ask questions. Don't worry about offending anybody or changing your mind. If someone tries to pressure you into a decision then they probably don't have your best interests in mind. I actually met with the birthparents that I chose, several times and I felt really happy with them. We write letters and send pictures through their attorney. You can have more or less contact, but that decision is up to you.

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Originally Posted By amy (again)

I strongly recommend that if you choose adoption that you go with an open adoption plan. It is better for you and eventually for the child.......I have a wonderful relationship with the birthfamily of my second adoption, and it has helped the kids to adapt much beter. of course my children were not infants either

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Originally Posted By April Miller

Hi, My name is April and I was in your situation, please feel free to call me at 614-488-8348 or email me at balmiller23@aol.com I understand what a difficult decision this has to be for you and I have a lot of resources that may help in your decision process.

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Originally Posted By Sue

Thank you very much for your kindness and for not jumping all over me like everyone else trying to get me to call or e-mail them. You kind of feel attacked. That's why I think the ParentProfiles.com site is so cool, because I can look at the adoptive parents and pick the ones I want. I feel like I have the choice at a time I don't have a lot of choices. I like that. It's very appealing.

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Originally Posted By Susan

I don't feel comfortable just calling someone off the Internet. If your information was up at a site like ParentProfiles.com I could go see it without having to step out of my saftey spot.

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Originally Posted By wewant2adopt1@aol.com

There are many resources available...a Christian adoption agency is one for sure. Experienced attorneys who will give you names and contact information for other birth mothers who have been assisted by him or her. Birth parents who will give you upfront information and allow you to contact their counselors and have information about home studies. Hope this helps.

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Originally Posted By Amy

GOOD RESPONSE!!!! That is how you need to handle all of the people who offer you their number right now. Alot of poeple would be interrested in adopting your baby...many of us are searching, but it is unfair for anyone to make you feel pressured whether the intend to or not.

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Originally Posted By Andy

Well everybody gave you lot's of advise already, one important one is to listen to your heart, if you don't feel 100% good about the couple or even single parent, don't do it. Most people I have talked to said that it felt just right. I hope you will find a great couple, there are a lot of things to consider, we adopted twin boy's I love it cause I know that they will have each other, in case they have a hard time dealing with being adopted. We have an open adoption, bmom has been here several times, we don't have any limets on how often and we give bmom fotos and video tapes. Sadly she has not been here since 2-20 the day before their 1st birthday, and she has only called us once, we don't have a current phone # or adr. to send recent fotos. You never know how things will turn out I just want our boy's to get to know her, see her, smell her .
Good luck