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Originally Posted By Bonnie

I am in a semi-open adoption, and send letter and photos to my son's birthmom. This last update just after his birthday 2 weeks ago, I sent for the first time, photos of him with his family - grandparents, friends, cousins, etc. It is the first time I have sent photos of him with any other people. Are bmoms usually okay with this? I thought she should see how happy he is with everyone, but I don't want her to think that she and her family don't matter. Any comments? One other note, we never hear from bmom.

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Originally Posted By Jennifer

I am not sure why the bmom does not correspond, but I am glad that you continue to send letters and photos. I am glad to see photoes of my son with the adoptive family. I want him to be a part of the family and have a normal happy life. I think highly of the adoptive family and am glad to see pictures of all of them. Thanks for considering her feelings in this matter.

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Originally Posted By birthmom Jamie

I love to see pictures of my bson & his wonderful afamily together.I love to see the love in their face when they look at him & hold him in the pictures.It gives me a warm feeling to see them together enjoying life with each other.It makes me feel good to see his big brother looking at him with so much love.

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Originally Posted By pictures can be deceiving

I have a baby book full of wonderful, happy-looking, pictures --but please remember pictures don't tell the "whole" story.

There never was a camera around when the "bad stuff" happened. Families are good at not airing their dirty laundry and family secrets. Most people had no clue about what happened behind our closed doors.

An abused adoptee

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It is true that an adoptive family could still hide abuse IF there is abuse that is occuring. However, it is appreciated by me and other birthmothers to see pictures of the child and family.