[millie58]

J, my 9 yo, who I got at 7, was in 5 different placements between bio mom and me. He's in talk therapy. He also had EMDR which had to be stopped. This year, in school, he's gone the spectrum of being ok to raging and not being able to calm down. He's starting to take Adderall and I was looking into him going back to EMDR. The school social worker made a comment about it being controversial which is giving me cause for concern. Anyone have any negative reactions from EMDR??

Thanks!!

Millie

[DianeS]

Sure it's controversial. But then again, so are Adderall and talk therapy. Controversial doesn't mean it won't work, if it's the right therapy for the person and if you find a well trained provider.

And yes, some people have "bad" experiences. Especially at first. It really helps the person to break through the self-defense walls they've built around themselves. And depending on what's on the other side, and depending on how well they've learned coping skills to ease the painful memories while dealing with them... I can definately see how some people can be overwhelmed.

I'm in EMDR therapy right now, working to mitigate the effects of my divorce and the junk that led up to it. It's really, really helping. But we had to spend the first several sessions going through memories with "small" impacts to me, to work on my coping skills so I wouldn't get overwhelmed when I started to work on memories with large impacts. Sometimes I'm not sure we did enough preliminary work. I had my last session on Tuesday, and except for work I cried almost solidly until Thursday evening.

It's a lot of hard work, going through those memories, remembering how I felt, remembering those internal "lessons" I got, and recognizing that what I learned from those "lessons" wasn't true. That there's a better way to think, a more true way to think. (And therefore a better way to act, etc.) I love the results, I see them already. But it is HARD work.

I can see how someone might think that crying for two days is "bad". But it wasn't for me. It sure felt awful at the time. But I had a lot of emotion to deal with, and being able to just cry is a pretty good coping skill. And now that I"m finished with the crying, I'm in a better place than I was before that particular session. It was worth it.

If you choose to pursue EMDR for him, I would make sure it's a good therapist. Lots of years in practice, certified in EMDR (there's at least two levels of certification, don't settle for level 1), someone experienced with using EMDR with children, and someone you're comfortable with in general.

I wish you the best in your decision!

[lucyjoy]

If your child is willing, in my opinion, it's a good way to go for PTSD. My kids would only go so far and they they just didn't want to go back into the memories.

I've had some EMDR done and if I had the resources, I'd go that route again.

[millie58]

Thanks!! I'll try it again. It worked when we did it.