[ladyexecutive]

My family and I are interested in adopting one or two older girls. We have two biracial daughters and one hispanic/caucasian daughter. My husband and I are an interracial couple (AA/Caucasian). Our daughters are 15, 12 and 2, so we are looking to adopt a child or children between 4 and 9. We live in Florida and do not mind participating in Inter-State adoption again. We have a homestudy already. We considered adopting through the State of Florida but the government agencies here are slow to respond, if they respond at all. Getting someone to call back is like finding an oil well in my backyard. Is anyone aware of any private agencies (or State) that we can approach? Are there any agencies that specifically work with older children? Would love to hear from you.

[MilehighDad]

Ladyexec,
As far as I know, Florida has one of the largest pools of waiting children in the country. That makes it such a tragedy that they can't even bother to call you back because there are literally hundreds of girls in Florida that meet the profile you are looking for and have very little chance of being adopted. Hopefully, someone online here can provide a couple references to some private agencies that will be more responsive, but I will help look into myself in the next couple of days.

Thank you for continuing to try after having your calls lost in the system. I would strongly recommend reading the book "Three Little Words" by Ashley Rhodes-Courter. It was written by a girl who was in the Florida foster care system for 7 years in the 90's. She desperately needed someone like you to step forward for her, but reading the book shows how messed up the system is and how it can be that they will not even call back. The book also talks about how there are group homes in Florida - orphanages really - full of kids waiting to be adopted. This is not old, outdated news, this is real now, today. I think what you need is contact to some of those organizations, because I believe they take an active role in finding adoptive parents.

Don't take offense, but in the book Ashley calls parents like you looking for kids "shoppers" because they pick and choose through the kids around her. And please understand, I have been a "shopper" too. But fortunately she was chosen, too, and she is a huge advocate for foster care adoption now. It is just a really intense view into what it is like to be a kid stuck in the system, and even worse stuck in a group home.

Thanks again and I will be looking into what I can find that will get you started. Hopefully someone else on the boards here can offer up some info, too.

[ladyexecutive]

Oh I'm not offended. My frame of thinking is based on the fact that I thought the child might be unfortable or feel better in a family where she at least was the same race as her siblings. I do love ALL kids.

I have a homestudy but it needs updating. Eveyone here is charging an arm and a leg to do it. The last quote I got was $1200. I can't afford that, in this economy. Any ideas?

Thanks, Shay

[Binny]

Have you talked to the Hearts Gallery people in your area? We applied for a sibling group once in FL through the Tampa Heart Gallery and they werent a good match for us, but they were very proactive on getting back to us. Good luck. We are in the process of getting two girls ages 12 and 10 (not in FL) it is possible and all those kiddos in FL deserve a great home.

[MilehighDad]

I'm still going to try some more, but no time yet. However, I do have a link that will help because I like Binny's suggestion. This is a link to a website that lists a lot of the Heart Galleries in the country, there are 12 listed in Florida alone. I do think you will get a better response from them and they may be able to provide great information on what steps to take next.

Search for Heart Galleries by State

[jazzysmom]

Have you tried Adopt America? They are really great and very helpful. They paid our update homestudy fee with grant money. You can go to their web site and register with them. They helped us find our sib group we are in the process of getting and are taking care of alot of the details for us. Can't say enough good things about them.

[ladyexecutive]

You are all wonderful. I agree that Florida does have a lot of children in foster care, but the area I am in, extremely unresponsive. Even if and when they respond, they ask for impossible things. When I adopted, I adopted from out of state, because the response was better. I saw two little girls in Oregon that I am very interested in. I'm going to look into Heart Gallery today and all the other suggestion you wonderful people have shared with me. I am trying to find someone to update my homestudy, but the least expensive quote I received was $700.00. Is this a good price?

[MilehighDad]

I think $700 is a reasonable price for an update.

Ok, one of the things I wanted to do was get one of my copies of "Three Little Words" back and see where Ashley was placed in a group home. (I have 12 copies) At the time Ashley was there, it was big enough to house 72 kids, around half of whom were ready for adoption. It is the Children's Home of Tampa, and their website is:
The Children's Home

The site says to check the Heart Gallery of Tampa for their kids photo listings and that Hillsborough county alone currently has more than 400 kids waiting to be adopted.

Most important, this is a comment from their FAQ page, which hopefully will help get someone on your case:

Q:
There is so much "red tape" involved. It just seems so confusing and I don't know where to begin. What help can I expect?
A:
One of the primary roles of The Children’s Home, Inc. is to act as a liaison with and provide information about all the agencies with which a family may interact during the process. We make every effort to make the process as "user friendly" and efficient as possible.

There is also information that indicates you can go to an orientation there and get all your training through them. I don't know where you are in Florida, but if you're not close enough to work directly with them, I'm sure you would still be close enough to get your homestudy updated locally and then visit there on weekends to try to match with one of their kids. Contact them and let us know how it goes!!!

[sundara]

If you adopt children from foster care, often if you have a private homestudy and/or lawyer bills, the placing state can/should reimburse you for those expenses.

My homestudy done privately in IL in 2001 cost $1200 so what you are quoting today ($700 to 1200) sounds very reasonable given inflation rates over the last seven years.

So if you cant get a grant or assistance, check into whether you could get reimbursed when the adoption is finalised (and make sure to keep all those receipts!).

Another item is using a group such as Lutheran Child & Family Services or Catholic Charities (you don't have to be Lutheran or Catholic, btw). These groups help with homestudies, social workers etc for a reasonable fee. LCFS does not necessarily help you find the child, they provide the services to help you adopt. Sometimes this is worth considering, as there are sometimes conflicts of interest when the agency that has your homestudy also has kids that they want to place - they may put getting the kids adopted ahead of the adopting parents preferences, which can sometimes result in mismatches that go awry.