[SuzBerg]

I thought it would be fun today to start a discussion about what is one thing (or more) that makes you happy you adopted your child/children. Lot's of times we post here for support, so sometimes those threads are more about the "issues" our kids have. So this thead should be about something you truly love, value, admire, whatever; in your child and why you are glad they are part of your family.

[SuzBerg]

I am happy we adopted E because she has brought a joy to our family that we would never know. Having 3 boys - I would never have gotten to experience the sweetness and love of a daughter (and also never have the thrilling experience of spending so much money on cute girl clothes). I also would not have the new faith in God that I have or the belief that miracles do happen. I know they do because we have a 6 year old miracle in our family!

[mamalove23]

I am very thankful that my Husband and I were unable to have children and feel truly blessed to have G as a part of or lives. He is the Joy of our family and I love his love for his "Mummy"

[Tudu]

I am so glad we decided on older kids for very selfish reasons. I hate diapers and I love to sleep uninterupted. They must not have gotten the memo b/c 5 of the 6 came wearing pull ups and it took more than a year to get my son to sleep more than an hour at a time. Good thing it wasn't a deal breaker and I fell in love with the most cuddly kids in the world. (Now if they would just quit leaving the pull ups on the floor for me to step on I would be the happiest Mom in the world.)

[momraine]

With my older child adoption I did get to avoid the diapers! Woo hooo. Also he can talk and now that he is fluent in English (it happened so fast it was amazing) he can talk about his feelings. It was amazing watching him learn, watching his amazment at new things. He also is always lecturing his friends about the fact that not everyone has parents so they should not complain about thiers. He remembers life before, and is grateful (most of the time) for things my other kids take for granted. He is an amazing kid and is good at figuring out how to do things in spite of his physical limitations.

[crick]

I'm happy we adopted older children specifically because while I love babies, I love them for short periods of time. I love to hold em, smell em', don't mind the diapers but honestly...they sleep an awful lot and yet demand a ton so you have to be there 24-7. For a little itty bitty thing, you sure get tired! I love watching my nieces and then I go home! LOL!

My children specifically....

J - I love that he has a terrific and very bright scientific mind. This is the child that will take apart things to see how they work and if he sticks with it, he'll put it back together. He can look at something in pieces and envision the finished product and tell you how to do it, which amazes me because I cannot do that at all. I love that at almost 11, he still loves to sit and cuddle with me and tells me he loves me.

S - She has so much empathy for others and animals and while it doesn't always hold truth for her brothers, her generosity towards others makes me tear up at times. I love that she's a strong girl and competitive and willing to put forth 100% of herself in most things that she tries. I love how she wants to mimic me by using my perfume or doing her hair similar to mine. Took awhile to get to the point where I'd be someone she wants to emulate.

K - I love his sense of humor and while I know it'll bite me in the butt one of these days, his prankster style and love of fun brings a lot of joy. He always asks me how my day was when he gets home and it's not because he's angling for something. Out of them all, he's my easygoing kid for the most part and when you have a group, it's a nice trait to have!! K always tries to befriend everyone and cheers us all on with his joyful personality.

T - My baby...sniff...he's 7! I see in him such courage and resiliance to overcome his effects of the past. He tries 150% to achieve things most kids barely have to try at and he has a great attitude to go along with it. Finds ways to compensate and overcome on his own and I'm proud of that. Best of all about T is he still loves imaginary play and his creativity amazes me in a world of techology and gadgets.

[Kansas Girl]

I got to diaper and feed most of my younger sibs so I didn't care about that. Sleepless nights and potty training I could also do without.

With older kids, for the most part, it's usually evident what all their issues are - no worrying about what learning issues will show up later when the child enters school.

Fran

[aspenhall]

By adopting A as an aolder child, I got to be able to discuss her issues with her and make REAL progress rather than just attend the symptoms of grief till she could understand it better....

I am glad to have avoided potty training, and sleepless nights and teething...and having them not be able to tell you what hurts when they are sick.

I think being able to communicate instantly is probably my favorite thing. Plus we didn't have to wait to for her to grow up to go do "family stuff" like amusement parks, museums, camping, paly soccer...etc...and she'll remember all of it and enjoyed them way more because she was old enough!

[scandi]

I am another one for the no diapers, no potty training, and no sleepless nights club. That and I also like babies for awhile but then it is good for them to go home.

D : his is very resliant. He has faced alot of trauma in his short life before coming home. He has come so far in the past 4 years. He is very creative and has an awesome imagination. Which is another amazing thing because he didn't know that he could be imaginative when he came home. It was very sad that this child did not know how to play and be imaginative at the age of 7. He has made up for lost time.

K: is my little "playa" he is charming, heart melting smile and boy does he like to look good. He is already charming the ladies and he is only in kindergarten. He is very talented musically. He loves to sing, play instruments and he can dance. And he always comes up with the darndest things. It's like he knows that his brother has some deficits and he will often help him so that he can over come them without being embarassed. Not bad for an almost 6 year old.

[Howdy]

I'm glad I adopted an older child because she deserves to have a safe home and not be hurt anymore. I don't know if she is too damaged to recover enough that she doesn't destroy her life, but I am so glad I can give her some years of a physically comfortable, safe, no-hunger, fun and happy life. And I have loved being a mom, at least until now when she is getting teenager-ish.

[DianeScraps]

Firstly, the girls have made us a real, complete, family.

Secondly, I love that we were able to work with them to make a plan. From the first day they had an input in our lives, and their future. We are the parents, and make the decissions, but they have been able to make choices too.

and, personally, as other have said, I don't miss not having the diaper phase AT ALL, but I did have more then enough sleepless nights and have been peed and puked on

[AmyAnne]

I like that he is old enough to have an opinion. For example, when we went house hunting he came along and made his own observations to help us decide on which house we liked best.

[MomwithFive]

I am glad that I adopted an older child because I have the chance to make a difference in her life. We are very dedicated to her. She was abused and severely neglected and deserves to have the rest of her childhood be peaceful, loving and in a healing atmosphere. I never thought I could love another as I do my bio's but I do. I just truly love this child and want her to be able to heal and be emotionally stable/happy in life.

[marythemom]

We can talk about things. I know they've been through a lot and while they don't like to talk about it, at least they have the words to do so. So many little ones have to act it all out.

We still have the diaper/pull up issues and the potty training is ongoing (will they ever learn to wipe and flush?), but they are old enough to clean up the mess themselves.

With 4 kids now I am sooo much more organized and structured which is good for all the kids, bio too.

We actually have a discipline plan that has lasted for more than a few weeks! I invented the FAIR Club for discipline and get to share it with other parents. It works and is therapeutic too. I don't have to feel guilty or need to yell or threaten. It only works with older kids so I'm glad that mine are old enough to read and write.

Mary
Mom to D(14) out of RTC for almost 1 month now and doing good and his sister C(12) I can't believe we still haven't been able to finalize her adoption yet! They've lived with us 14 months now!
bio kids K(11) and her brother who'll be 9 on Friday.
"When one door closes, another opens. But we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we don't see the one that has opened for us." - Helen Keller

[tmjbstark]

...my kid is the greatest kid in the world! Well, a lot of the time, that is!

She has made our hearts full, challenged our minds, and brought us closer together as a family.

I admire her for who she is. She is an exhuberant little ball of energy who is constantly thinking and moving and learning and loving life.