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Old 07-18-2004, 04:04 AM
Mex Mex is offline
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Dealing with repetitive issues....

I posted awhile back about my daughter, who was not yet placed, and her food issues. Well that was just over a 1-week visit, and now she has been with me about 2 months. In general it is going really well, but this food thing is driving me nuts. I understand the control/security issue, but yikes, how do you deal with repetitive issues?
She obsesses about food. Asks all day about what foods she is going to have. Her "happiest" moments are when she gets something "big", like a giant slice of pizza, and then she can talk about it for hours. I'm guessing that food comes up as a conversation about 50 times or more a day. Not to mention that none of what she likes is healthy and it's hard to feed her without controlling her, since she really only wants fried chicken. Ever.
So the big question is -- how do you deal with the repetitiveness. Sometimes it makes me want to pull my hair out. I try to redirect. Try not to make food a focus myself, and just give her quick answers. I know for her it is going to take time, good counseling (which she has), and security, but for me -- any advice how to keep from pulling my hair out?

Thanks!
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Old 07-18-2004, 04:25 AM
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Peggy Peggy is offline
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Food Issues

I gave my daughter a food drawer. That is where I kept snacks (pretzels, crackers, etc.) Also have food out that she can snack on (fruit) I also allowed my daughter to label some items as hers in the refrigerator. As far as the repetitiveness. It can get to you, and it will happen with other issues. Try to modify your reaction,(Pull yourself back a little from the situation, find the humor) since change in your daughter may be slow.
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Old 07-18-2004, 01:20 PM
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Dr. Art Dr. Art is offline
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Don't control food!

You cannot win food battles. If your daughter is to ever learn to regulate her food intake and to feel a deep sense of safety and security with you so that she can trust that you really will take care of her (as evidenced by the food issues dissappearing), then you should let her eat all she wants and be sure that you provide snacks and such.

Generally I'd not let her get her own food. It should all come from you. Make a game of feeding her. Give everyone small portions so that she has to ask for more and you can then give her more...until she has had enough. Provide a fruit bowl or snack bowl that she can see and get food from whenever she wants (preferrably by asking you).

good luck
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