[BethanyB]

Here is the website. It lists the number to call. Just call them. There is no need to contact the state as well. They train people FOR the state so they can take care of you.

Good luck!

[kimyas]

My husband I have been talking about this most the weekend. He is afraid he wont be able to afford a child once we adopt. Also his big thing is we are both 40 and he said to me when hes 70 the child will be 20. So I think hes very iffy about the situation now. Hes more worried about the idea of not being able to afford a child. One child shouldnt be too bad.

[chickie1221]

Kim, my husband was 46 and I was nearly 50 when we finally became parents. We brought home our 2 year-old special needs daughter 17 months ago, and while it's a real steep learning curve (!), we couldn't be happier. I'm tired and my back aches, but I laugh every day. My husband's fears were the same as your husband's ("I don't want to be paying for college when I'm retired!" "I'm not going to live 'til 70!"), but they all evaporated when he laid eyes on her, and she is 100%Daddy's Girl. He thanks me again and again for talking him into fost-adopting, and for bringing this sweet baby into his life. If your husband would like to talk man to man about this topic, I'm sure my husband would be happy to chat with him. I emailed you with my phone #. We are in Ocean County, also.
Nancy
ps if you adopt a child who is over the age of 2, or a member of a minority group, or special needs, you do get a small monthly stipend until the child is 18. Not at all the reason to adopt a child, but it was a nice surprise...

[kimyas]

I am going to make the call to Just Babies this week but I see a problem already. The classes noted on their site are wednesday and a few day later on saturday morning for 3 weeks. I live an hr an a half away and work til 5 my husband work til 5 usually sometimes later. He is closer to home than I am. I work in Freehold so it takes me about an hr to get home. I have no idea how I would make the Wednesday classes. This might not be an option for me but I dont know if I can do this now. I know its only for 3 weeks but weekends are the only time we are really available for classes. Is there anyplace else I can take classes closer to home? I live in Ocean County NJ?

Kim

[arubagirl]

We took our classes in Lakewood and TOms River..

[kimyas]

Originally Posted by arubagirl

We took our classes in Lakewood and TOms River..

Was that thru Just babies or DYFS?

[BethanyB]

I think Just Babies only does classes in Short Hills. They use a church basement for classes.

You can you use any DYFS office in the county you are in but I just happen to think using Just Babies is better. I traveled about 50 minutes to get there during my training. The three weeks went by so quickly.

[kimyas]

Its an hr and a half for me and that would be during rush hour so I have no idea how I would get there on time.

[BethanyB]

Oh that stinks! You may need to end up using your local DYFS office.

[kimyas]

Now I'm not sure what I should do as I heard Just babies is the better place to go. But an hr and a half both ways ...ugg - 2 days a week for 3 weeks!!!!!

[kimyas]

Well I called Just Babies today. I talked to one of the ladies there and she is sending me the paperwork and I have signed up for the classes starting this month. I will just have to leave work early for a few days of the wednesday classes is all. She said she could have me approved by spring!!!

Kim

[Joei_in_NJ]

Good Luck - I have heard nothing but great things about them - Kinda wish I went thru them myself

[BethanyB]

Congrats! Yes, it does happen very fast. It is quite amazing.

[kimyas]

I have a question. When DYFS calls you about a child and you accept how fast do you need to go pick the child up? Also since I work full time will the child already be set up in child care or do I have to go and find the day care for the child while I am at work? Thanks.

[BethanyB]

First you need to think about the age range you will looking for. Remember that most daycares only take babies that are six weeks and older. I do not reccommend passing up a baby just because a daycare provider will not take him or her. See about finding temporary care with a relative or friend if you are not planning on taking time off.

I would start looking for daycare centers as soon as you start the class. It takes time to find the right center, visit and work out pricing. Remember that DYFS only pays for a portion of the childcare costs and you must pay the rest. As the kids get older the stipend goes down.

Some places have a waiting list. The place I wanted to put my son in had one. Some places let you put your child on the waiting list before you get one because adoption is tricky in that way. You just don't know when the child is coming. If they call you for a spot and you don't have a child yet, they will call the next person.

As far as when you need to pick the baby up...If the child is a newborn in a hospital and healthy, they will want you to pick up ASAP. Each day in the hospital costs money so they want the babies home.

After I had my son, I got the call for his bio sister unexpectedly. I was not fostering or waiting for any more children. They called me to see if I wanted her out of the blue and then told me they HAD to drop her off the next day. Here I was a single mom with a one year old and they were dropping off a newborn the next day. No planning or anything. Let me tell you how fast my heart was pounding.

They gave me money for a double stroller and had a brand new crib delivered before she even got to the house.

If you are getting a child that is not a newborn, you may get a call and they may want you to take the child that day. It does happen pretty fast. If you are open to race and gender it can happen even faster.