[ladyzee]

Hello everyone
So the last time we spoke I mention that the trial was going to court and I was concern on whether I should go or not well to make a long story short I went. And I got a chance to see the birth father for the first time. The court days were April 13, 25, 28 I went to the last date. Anyways since then it’s been a real Mess! And I’m running on low. I love my son he is all that I have and I am all that he has. But DYFS is just USING me! My son will be two in 2 weeks and this trial is still going on. What does that mean? Are these people really concerning placing him back with a women whom he has never lived with. And who still by the way has no job or place to live. Why is this lady doing this to this poor child? I can’t understand for the life of me why would she want him back now after two years and why does she still have rights?

[SIZE=3]I’m not upset I’m mad as hell! And I’m seriously thinking about taking legal action against DYFS for all the BS they are putting my son and me through! [/size]

[leenab]

Sorry to hear about your bad news. DYFS is so messed up (for lack of a better term or 10 page rant of words describing the system). They are constantly dropping the ball with everything and just don't get called on it nearly enough. And some of the Judges are probably just as bad if not even worse. Because it seems the ultimate decision lies with the judge. It really makes me want to go to law school. And if I go back to school it will be for that reason.

I'm heading out to a placement review today and am getting the feeling that I'll come home with bad news.

Obviously these bioparents don't care enough to get themselves straightened out for the sake of their children. Parenthood is about self sacrifice and I just don't see bioparents doing this a whole lot. And taking years to get things together, don't even start me on that one. DE'NILE just isn't a river in Egypt.....

[lambeausam]

I'm so sorry this is taking so long. I hope this is resolved soon.

Sam

[Kate1129]

I am sorry this is so hard! We've all been there!!!


The one thing that I have found is that the bio parents don't look that them as their children, they are a possession! Simple as that.

[41deacon]

I am really sorry you have to go through DYFS's bs. In my situation my Wife and I faced many obsticals. Many times the situation seemed helpless, but it worked out in the end. I don't know if you are a praying person or not so I will Pray for you. God can and will answer your Prayers if you put ALL your trust in him.

[tsangia]

LadyZ
I completely understand. It took...brace yourself.. 5 1/2 years for my daughter's adoption to become finalized. She came at 3 months old, they terminated finally at 4 years old, then we had an appeal that last 1 1/2 years. After many many many frustrating years...like what your going thru now my daughter is ours.
I lost alot of those years really truly bonding with her. You always have to hold back a piece of yourself for fear of reunification. Our relationship is wonderful, she never suffered from it, it was just me...never really knowing when she was a baby/toddler.

But, the good news is I adopted her biological sister 1 year later, and were in the process of adopting another bio sister now.
We've been involved with this 1 family for 9 years. Continually adopting as they produce. My oldest daughter is 9 now. She asked one day, why does she keep having kids...LOL
I told her because God wants them to be our children.
My children are all very happy, emotional balanced, well behaved honor roll students. My husband and I are so blessed.

DYFS is without a doubt the most emotionally difficult process to go through. We unfortunatly have very little rights.
They see us as a babysitting service.
The process of dealing with them is an extended labor..of giving birth.
But in the end... you forget about the pain
and then your a family!
Best of Luck
Tsangi