[Lucretia]

Hi Everyone:

I need some serious help. I recently found my sister and now a friend of our Mother's has asked for help. This is the oddest thing though that I have ever seen so all of the conventional searches have not helped me so I was hoping that one of you could help.

In January 1966 a young unmarried girl was about to give birth and all during her pregnacy her doctor tried to get her to give the baby up but she refused. A day or two before she had her baby the doctor said that it had died. On January 22nd 1966 she gave birth to her baby but was never allowed to see it and was all drugged up. The doctor then refused to let her leave the hospital to go to the funeral because he said that she still hadn't cried. Her mother took care of all of the funeral arrangements with the Evergreen Funeral Home but the doctor said that no one could see the baby. They were very poor so the cemetery donated a plot, a casket and a gown for the baby to be burried in but none of the family were ever allowed to see the baby. A funeral service was too expensive and since the young girl was not allowed to leave the cemetery just burried the baby without a service or any family present.

In 1985 the girl had grown into a woman and decided that she wanted to put a marker on the grave of her baby. Now in a little better financial condition she contacted the cemetery so that she could make the arrangements and was told that there was no record of the baby being there. She thought that maybe she got the information on the cemetery wrong so she filed for a birth and death certificate. This was in April of 1985 and vital statistics states, "This certifies that the original records and all appropriate indexes in this office have been carefully searched and no record of the death of Robert Alfred Heding on January 22, 1966, or any day during 1966."

Somehow she then wound up getting a hand written death certificate dated February 1, 1966 that was not signed by the doctor himself but by whoever filled out the death certificate and no number was on the certificate. Then in August another death certificate is sent to her, this one is not handwritten but typed and again not signed by the doctor, his name is typed in. It does have a number though, it is 299. A letter was attached that there was no birth certificate since the baby was stillborn but the name Robert Alfred Heding is on the death certificate. I have never heard of such a thing. Most of the time a birth certificate is always issued as well as a death certificate because with all things you do not exist until a birth certificate is issued. One would have thought that it would have said boy and not his full name without a brith certificate but state laws could have been different in the 60s I guess. The cemetery where the baby was supposed to be burried is not on the handwritten certificate but on the typed one. The explanation is that the cemetery had changed hands over the years. Now, I worked for a cemetery years ago and I know that state regulations state that every burial must be recorded and plotted. I believe that the last two death certificates were obtained from the hospital itself in 1985 which was the Hunterdon Medical Center in Flemington, NJ.

Since 1985 when she first set out to mark her baby's grave this woman has not had any rest in finding where her baby is at. The words of her doctor trying to get her to put the child up for adoption ring in her ears and she wonders if something went wrong. We have asked if maybe her mother and the doctor could have decided what was best for her and the baby behind her back and she is adament that her mother wouldn't have done that. She just needs to know if her baby did in fact die or if somehow she was lied to and he is out there somewhere. I have come up against a brick wall in all of my searches and I am hoping that one of you can help.

I have all of the copies of the letter sent to her in April of 1985 stating the county has no record as well as the two different certificates sent to her later that year in August. If the baby is dead she just wants to mark his little grave and finally be able to have the service to say her final goodbyes, but if he is by some chance alive then she needs to be reunited with her son that should have been in her arms back in 1966. If anyone could help me bring some final closure to this woman it would be greatly appreciated.

God Bless,

[j barnes-moore]

I hate to say this but it sounds to me like this child is alive and well out there somewhere ,,,since no one involed will ever tell you the truth ,,,,try posting your storie and the birthdate of the child all over the net ,,,,,god bless ,,carol