[erayrn]

I met my bmom last weekend and I am disappointed. First of all I spent the whole day waiting for her to arrive and she didn't come until after 4pm. She never bothered to call or anything letting my know when to expect her. I was hoping that we would make a connection and she would really want to know about me but she spent the whole time talking about herself and didn't really seem interested in me at all. She went to meet my adoptive mom a few days later and told her all sorts of things, like my mom wouldn't tell me or something. She said she didn't like my husband and that I was far too influenced him and the church we go to (we are in leadership at our church and I am glad it is a big influence in my life, without it I would be dead or on drugs out there somewhere.) I am angry at her now for the things she said behind my back. If she didn't want to know me, why did she come? Plus she was rude to my parents, cutting off my dad when he was speaking etc. I guess I knew we weren't going to have this great relationship but I thought maybe meeting in person might help things get closer since it wasn't happening on the computer. I think she is a very selfish person and I guess that is probably why she gave me away when she had me. Sorry to vent.

[tc122196]

I am so sorry to hear about your failed friendship with your mom. Thank God that you have two wonderful parents that love you very much though--and the church to support you emotionally and spiritually. Dealing with a selfish birthmom myself, I understand why you would feel that way, but honestly I think most of the time the selfishness is an act--trying to hide the feelings of regret...and other emotional feelings. Just pray for your birth mom, and in Gods timing you will have a glorious reunion.

[BettyPsych]

Remember that you are strangers to each other. It is very difficult to form a bond with our birth mothers. They are blood strangers. Be clear that you are okay with or without your birth mother. It is her loss.