[Lauve]

I am looking for my sister (who is now 23), I've just started. But now I am a little worried. What if she doesn't want to meet us? I can take that. I would understand if she didn't. I just don't want to upset her. I am 25, with three kids of my own. I woke up one morning and decided it was something that i needed to do. Does anyone have any advice for me? I've given my information to the agency, should i activly look for her? or just make my information avalible when she is ready..
Thanks

[Dickons]

Lauve,

First off - thank you for being open to contact and searching.

You can choose many routes during your wait for the agency to get back to you.

Passively search: Register your search on free internet registries like the one on this site. Also consider registering with ISRR (google and you will find the form to fill in and mail - they then check their registries and if a match is found contact you as well as keeping your info for the future).

Active search by CI: Check your state laws on whether or not they allow a confidential intermediary to access your sisters files and search and contact her on your behalf. If she does not want contact and does not sign forms you will know that, but nothing else. There is usually a fee for the service.

Active search by you: You start looking and posting on message boards etc of your search and try to narrow things done the best you can.

Whatever way you choose - always list the places you have registered and check back on whatever schedule you choose, monthly, 6 months etc as well as keeping your contact details up to date! Also keep some small piece of info private that may help you confirm but that is always dependent on the fact that your sister has that small piece of info. You can always do a mtdna test as hsister to hsister as it is passed on by the mother.

Keep in mind that your sister may not be at the stage in her life that she wants contact, some do, some don't until they are older.

Good luck,
Dickons

[Lauve]

I found her!! on Facebook of all places. she is amazing. All my worries, went down the drain. Her parents did an awesome job with her! And now, i'm even going to help find her brother's birthmother!!!! I haven't cried like this since my children were born!!!

[Dickons]

Congratulations! The best news I have heard today.

Take care,
Dickons

[dpen6]

Wow, That was quick!! Hope it continues to go well and you can enjoy a true sisterhood.