[tele234]

Was contacted the other day from young woman who found me in a database.
When I was 18, girlfriend and I split after I found her with two of my friends.
She came back later and told me she was with child, not knowing if I was the father, I filled out the information sheet however I never signed it. I do not know If I am the father or either one of my friends were.
However now that I have been contacted by someone, who was from different state (not me). I felt that I need to get this posted so that I might help someone else.
So if you were born late 1977/78, in Indianapolis Indiana, birthmothers name was Elliott.
And you think I might be your bio father, I will do anything to solve your questions. I do not know the sex .. so it could be girl or boy. I have never contacted the bio mother since 1977, so I have no other information.

[thesearchguru]

Welcome to the Search and Reunion Message Board!

NOTICE: The State of Indiana will search for and locate your birth relatives using their “confidential intermediary” search program.

Using a Confidential Intermediary: This service is provided through the registry. However, be aware that if the person does not want contact that you will not be given the identifying information to contact them yourself. There is also a fee associated with this service.

Using the Adoption Registry: For adoptions finalized before December 31, 1993, birth parents or adopted adults can request identifying information, which will be released only if consent is given from the party who is the subject of the request. If consent is not already on file, a confidential intermediary may be appointed. For adoptions finalized after December 31, 1993, adopted adults age 21 or older will receive identifying information on the birth parents if the birth parents have not filed an affidavit requesting non-disclosure at the time the adopted adult request is made. Adopted adults age 21 or older, adoptive parents of a minor, and birth siblings age 21 or older can request identifying information, which will be released if consent is given from the party who is the subject of the request. If no consent is on file, the State registrar will search for other birth siblings if they are 21 or older to see if they consent.

Contact:
Indiana Adoption History Registry
Attn: Registrar, Vital Records Division
PO Box 1964
Indianapolis, IN 46206
(317) 233-7253


For questions about adoption related information and records:
Indiana Division of Family and Children
Bureau of Family Protection and Preservation
402 West Washington Street, 3rd Floor, W-364
Indianapolis, IN 46204

Obtaining Non-Identifying Information: Adopted adults, birth parents, and adoptive parents may obtain non-identifying information. Contact the adoption agency that facilitated the adoption to request this information.

Obtaining Identifying Information: Identifying information is provided through an Adoption Registry.


Obtaining an Original Birth Certificate: An adoptee must petition the court in which the adoption was finalized to receive.

Providing Information: Medical, non-identifying, and identifying information can be provided by adopted adults, birth parents, adoptive parents, birth siblings, and, under certain circumstances, the spouse or a relative of a deceased adopted adult or a deceased birth parent.




Email:



Other great websites to check out:
http://www.adoptionchat.com
http://www.adoptionlists.com
http://www.adoption.com
http://www.adopting.org
http://registry.adoption.com/

[thesearchguru]

Advice For Reuniting With A Biological Relative by Dr. Phil:

Reconnecting with a long lost loved one can be a powerful experience, and therefore you need to plan for it. Dr. Phil gives advice on preparing for both the reunion, and the relationship afterward.

· Think about the reasons you want to reunite with your parent, child or sibling. Remember, they have a family and so do you. You can't turn the clock back or expect to fill the role that you have not played all these years. You are adults, strangers with genetic ties, coming together to build a relationship. Be realistic about the role that you feel you can play in their life and vice versa.

· You must go into the reunion with realistic expectancies, not fanciful hopes. If you make someone out to be perfect, you are guaranteed to be disappointed. People get hurt when they have unrealistic expectations, and those expectancies are dashed. These unrealistic expectancies can set you up for failure. It is not what happens in people's lives that upsets them, it's whether or not what what happens in their lives is what they expected that upsets them. Don't allow yourself to think that everything in your life will suddenly be resolved overnight once you reunite, or you will be let down.

· A reunion is an event, but the relationship is a process that needs time to unfold. You have to really work to build a relationship and you have to be patient. Start out with the goal of finding something that is comfortable for everybody, and don't put any pressure on yourself.

· Allow a natural evolution of things to take place. Like all relationships, expect your relationship with the person you have reunited to go up and down. Your best chance for having a good relationship long term is to take it slow and move at a measured pace. This is a marathon and not a sprint. Be patient and let it unfold naturally, so that it will be lasting. You don't want to do anything that would cause this coming together to separate you again.

· When adoptive parents are supportive of the process it strengthens the bond between them and their children. Adoptive parents are the real heroes. They are the ones that have stepped up and filled the void for these children. Adoptive parents should not take it personally when their child wants to find his/her birth parents. The search is not about rejection. It is part of human nature to want to know who we are and where we come from.





Email:
California Website:


Other great websites to check out:
http://www.adoptionchat.com
http://www.adoptionlists.com
http://www.adoption.com
http://www.adopting.org
http://registry.adoption.com/