[radiodoll]

Well -

Here's the last entry in the Radiodoll search and contact x-file for 2003.

Mother found. Mother says that husband (not my father) speaks for family and made the decision when they were married 46 years ago to never speak of it again. Husband not allowing her to talk to me. CI is trying to convince her to write a closing letter to me to al least include SOMEthing. We are begging for one photo.

Mother says she has to ask her husband. Wow. I found my mother and discover she was born without a brain. It's an amazing story. Am thinking of selling it to The Inquirer.

Mother is a farmer. I am NOT. Mother gardens and sews. Didn't get those brain chips either. Well, guess I'm not like MOM. Clearly I would have run away from home at an early age.

Oh, wait! I DID run away at an early age. Hmmm....what does this science experiment tell us?

"I ams what I ams." I think Popeye was prophetic.

2 sisters married with kids. Somebody's got grandkids. Mom's comment to CI was...

"It was just stupid thing. I didn't even know the guy was married."

For the record: I am not a stupid thing. I am a beautiful, creative, talented, highly influencial and profound woman of respect and desirablity. With a couple of misdemeanours o her police report. Ha!

You LOSE mother! Too bad you don't have a life. Hope the cows are well.

Radiodoll

[Just Julie]

Well you made me laugh out loud this morning. Thank you. But I'm sure there is some pain underneath your well-written humor. I vaguely remember reading some of your postings before I went on vacaion 2 weeks ago. Now I will have to go back and refresh my feeble memory.

Just remember that the quote "It was just stupid thing. I didn't even know the guy was married." DOES NOT REFER TO YOU!!! The antecedent to "it" is your mother's own choice and behavior, the "act" that resulted in you, not you yourself.

I, for one, think you ought to be a published writer. Maybe you already are! May God bless you and give you peace in addition to the sense of humor you didn't get from your mother either.

[debsdone]

Well, you are absolutely, 100%, undeniably RIGHT......your birthmother is truly the loser here. I am sorry it didn't work out better. My meeting was successful......but disturbing. there is much dysfunction in my birthfamily, and I think the difference was glaringly obvious. Had I grown up with them, things would be different, not better at all. Whatever problems I had within my adoptive family, the benefits seem to have outweighed them by miles. I am happy to report that my meeting has totally reinforced my belief that I was EXACTLY where I was meant to be, good bad or indifferent! I am interested in establishing a relationship with my birthfamily, but there will not be the romance that I so often see expressed (in a mostly hopeful fashion) on these forums. We, above all else need to be absolutely REAL if we intend to search. There is at least as much a likelihood that there will be a disappointment at the end of the search as anything else. Forewarned is forearmed I am not disappointed so much as I truly had no expectations. Hopes, yes. but expectations, no. And it saved me much pain. Love, Debi

[vicrose]

Hey Radiodoll....I am soooo sorry that things didn't work out better for you, but like Deb said previously...we were put with our adoptive parents for a reason...I truly believe that if I was raised with my birthmother that I would of probably become a lying little manipulator just like her...thank goodness something good came out of my adoption!!!! It really stinks that your birthmom can't think for herself...how dare she deny you the warmth and security that a mother is supposed to give....if not at birth..then now as an adult...but it's like you said...she has no thoughts of her own....she is still letting others dictate her life...what a shame..because she is truly missing out on knowing a wonderful person like you!!!! Hugs, Brenda...

[Dragonfly82]

Radio ~ Julie, Debi and Brenda already said everything I was thinking . . . just wanted to send you a {{{{{HUG}}}}} and tell you I'm sorry things didn't work out like you might have hoped.

If your life had been different in any way, you wouldn't be the wonderful YOU we have come to enjoy so much! So glad you're you and you've been were you've been!


{{{{{{HUGE HUGS}}}}}}

[patrisha]

radiodoll,

Once again I marvel at how women of today can consider themselves strong and independent when so many of my birthmom sisters cower at the prospect of meeting their own flesh and blood. I sincerely hope for your sake she will at least be willing to provide some pictures and a note.

You are not only "a beautiful, creative, talented, highly influencial and profound woman of respect and desirablity (w/ a blotter LOL)" you are one of our cyber buddies and I for one hope you don't sign off into the sunset on us.

Warmest hugs and wishes,

Trish

[shirleyville]

Boy, Radio.....it seems the line gets longer and longer! I am sorry you have joined the ranks!
Please don't leave us....we all need to stick together!
Hugs,
Sally

[bajohnson]

radio,
OH CRAP!
B

[rccc4@earthlink]

U MADE ME LAUGH AND CRY!!!

I AM STILL SEARCHING FOR MY MYSTERY BIRTHMOTHER..

BUT I'M SURE THAT (IN MY MIND) SHE HAS CURLERS IN HER HAIR NO TEETH (MAYBE SOME), 12 KIDS, 100 CATS, 2 TRAILER HOUSES,
A HUSBAND NAMED BUB..AND I WOULD BE HAPPY AND THANKFUL SHE GAVE ME A BETTER LIFE...SOUNDS LIKE YOU GOT THE BETTER END OF THE DEAL..SHE IS PRETTY PATHETIC..IM SORRY BUT YOUR RIGHT, ITS HER LOSS..I TRY NOT TO EXPECT VERY MUCH, HOPING I WONT BE TOO LET DOWN BY THE OUTCOME!!!

MOVE ON AND BE HAPPY!!


I'LL TRY... CR

[collinsfriend]

Too bad your BMom is still unable to be accountable. Maybe she is controlled by some social or religious culture where the "man" is the "head" of the house and can rule like a despot. . Or-maybe she is using her husband's "word" as an excuse to avoid recognizing her responsibility in her actions, and having to work on a new relationship. Gardening is so much easier. She can stay in lala land that way. I wonder if she has ever stood her ground. That too, takes responsibility. Well, I hope your AF's were nice, imagine being raised by Felix and Ignatz!

[radiodoll]

You guys make ME laugh out loud!

I like the whole "religious cult" thing. It could happen, right? Like the movie "The Stepford Wives."

Somehow I don't think Mother would approve of me if we ever had to actually "re-une." But look at it this way, this is saving me THOUSANDS in rapid weight loss systems and Botox. I can continue to teeter on the edge of depravity and weep about a "faceless past." HA!

Anyway I agree with Debi, I came into this with no expectations. I had hope and anxiety but as I am processing this and a few other "ISH-SHOES" I am working on, I am actually feeling alot better.

Yes, I feel pain and disappointment, but I adore my birthparents (the poor things) and I am petitioning for their sainthood. My poor Amom soent most of my life like a deer in the headlights. She never knew what hit her. And it's not like she could take me back - she never got a receipt!

Love you guys. Keep posting chuckles.

Radiodoll

[Laura Palmer]

I am so sorry for the pain you must feel. It's their loss though. If you need to talk you can PM me anytime. Hang in there!!!! Something better will happen. Sue

[Jackiejdajda]

>Mother says that husband (not my father) speaks for family and made the decision when they were married 46 years ago to never speak of it again.

Her feelings do not matter.. Or she is hiding behind his feelings.

I hope one day she fights this.


Jackie

[maureen salamon]

Radio, I can't pretend to understand how there are people in the world like your bmom -- but I am very disappointed for you. However, you sound like you're keeping things well in perspective. I'm repeating someone who posted earlier, but I'm sure her "mistake" did not refer to you, simply to her own actions, which apparently she can't/won't own up to.

You are better off without her. Sad but true.

[Missy M]

Radiodoll....I am so sorry for the way your story is/isn't going. Heck, just reading your humorous posts here, I'll take you sight unseen. Here's a hint: Go ahead and publish/ sing/ model/ Rap/ dance/ act/ grow a Jo-Lo butt, do a Martha Stewart and build a race car using ivy leaves and oven mitts or play pro ball/ golf/ tennis or whatever it takes to make a kazillion $$ and become a guest on Oprah. I'll bet she will be climbing out the woodwork hand-pushed by a bearded suspender-wearing beer-belly husband saying "Ida Jean, go on up there a git that baby of yourn' back...I can't for the life of me figure why you done waited this long, there she is on the TV looking just like you, and I'm so proud!"
Seriously Doll, I am so sorry for the pain this must cause, but so happy you can laugh about it. I am making light of this only because you are. I don't know her situation, and as a fellow b-mom, I simply haven't walked in her shoes, and I can't speak for her. No matter what wrong she has done/ is / isn't doing, she did one amazingly awesome wonderful thing....too bad she can't stand up and take a bow. Don't leave us.....Missy