[Mike_Va]

Three days ago or so I went on this website to to a search, I have tried for the past 20 years or so , always getting no where. I think we found each other, we have met and was amazing, didnt even know i had a lil sis. I am a tough knuckleheaded kinda guy, was very emotional not the norm for me...the problem i am having is why after we have met am i looking for things that are WRONG with them , when there isnt? confused......

[Momokat]

Hi Mike.
I don't have answers except that everything surrounding your reunion is going to be like a rollercoaster of emotions. Like your emotions are in a blender. On all sides.
If you read other posts from adoptees and birth parents, they all seem to echo "take it slow".
Many good books are out there. But you will probably learn just as much reading other's posts of those going through it right now.
Good luck with your journey! That is pretty exciting to find someone you have been looking at for 20 years!

[dpen6]

Just a thought here mike,,,,could it be because if you find something "wrong enough" you don't have to deal with the fear and HOLY TERROR of following through with it?

That even though it is something you really wanted and needed when it becomes reality the jolt of emotions is nothing short of terrifing? That maybe you have NO idea how to proceed and that life as you know it has just changed in some terrifing way.

Did I mention that in as much it is an exciting and wonderful thing .its TERRIFING!!!

Didn't mean to scare you or anything...LOL...

Seriously...just take one day at a time, take it as slow as you need to to process everything in a healthy way.