[Jackiejdajda]

Isnt this all so amazing.. I love getting to know folks on these forums and finding the places where it went down.. the homes.. the hospitals..
I went and stood outside of the hospital I was born in.. years ago..

And Joan.. I hope you tell us if you do find something.. We all need full circle.. don't we.

Jackie

[RavenSong]

Originally Posted by Jackiejdajda

We all need full circle.. don't we.

Jackie, speaking of coming full circle, one of my very favorite songs from long ago was "The Circle Song" by Joni Mitchell. I used to sing it a lot when I was playing in coffeehouses back in the '70s. It was so meaningful to me because it always reminded me of my lost child...it seemed like a song written for birthmothers. And then the 1980's came...and Joni Mitchell "came out" as a birthmom. An 'aha' moment for me...

[BrockBaby]

Ah, yes the Circle Game by Joni Mitchell. I never thought of that song in regards to adoption, but listening to it now, I can totally see how it could...
the lyrics...
We cant return, we can only look behind
From where we came
And go round and round and round
In the circle game

Those lyrics REALLY speak to me as an adult adoptee in reunion. We can't return, but we can look back, and then GO FORWARD....

[RavenSong]

Brock, the song just always spoke to me. I have no idea whether Joni was thinking of her daughter or not when she wrote it. I know she did write another song called "Little Green", which is about her daughter, Kilauren. Anyway, thanks for correcting me on the title of "The Circle Game". I swear I'm losing my memory...I'm been going thru that wonderful time of life known as menopause, and it seems to be really affecting my memory. For anyone who is interested in the complete lyrics:

"The Circle Game" by Joni Mitchell

Yesterday a child came out to wonder
Caught a dragonfly inside a jar
Fearful when the sky was full of thunder
And tearful at the falling of a star

Then the child moved ten times round the seasons
Skated over ten clear frozen streams
Words like when you're older must appease him
And promises of someday make his dreams

And the seasons they go round and round
And the painted ponies go up and down
We're captive on the carousel of time
We can't return we can only look
Behind from where we came
And go round and round and round
In the circle game

Sixteen springs and sixteen summers gone now
Cartwheels turn to car wheels thru the town
And they tell him take your time it won't be long now
Till you drag your feet to slow the circles down

And the seasons they go round and round
And the painted ponies go up and down
We're captive on the carousel of time
We can't return we can only look
Behind from where we came
And go round and round and round
In the circle game

So the years spin by and now the boy is twenty
Though his dreams have lost some grandeur coming true
There'll be new dreams maybe better dreams and plenty
Before the last revolving year is through

And the seasons they go round and round
And the painted ponies go up and down
We're captive on the carousel of time
We can't return we can only look
Behind from where we came
And go round and round and round
In the circle game

Copyright © Siquomb Publishing Company
Printed from the official Joni Mitchell website: JoniMitchell.com

[BrockBaby]

That's okay Raven! It is a beautiful song...so many meanings in it if you really look at it.

Jackie...I've been to the hospital my bmom gave birth to me many times, but never been past where the Florence Crittendon (spelling??) Home was. I was very aware of the girls home she stayed in for a few months, it was in a very nearby town, and I always thought it was a very "neat" looking home. It was just a big home on the main street of the town....funny that I was "attracted" to it, eh?

[JoanFarley1946]

I do appreciate your help in finding a picture of the hospital that once was. I know it was torn down since it was so old. let me know where to look when you find one.

[Jackiejdajda]

Raven wrote

Jackie, speaking of coming full circle, one of my very favorite songs from long ago was "The Circle Song" by Joni Mitchell. I used to sing it a lot when I was playing in coffeehouses back in the '70s. It was so meaningful to me because it always reminded me of my lost child...it seemed like a song written for birthmothers. And then the 1980's came...and Joni Mitchell "came out" as a birthmom. An 'aha' moment for me...

I was listening to Coyote the other nite and I was taken back to those times.. I was remembering the life.. that incredible life..
And I cried.. I love that I can cry now.. that I do not have to look back in misery.. and helplessness..

Joan we have captured your thread..

But oohhhhh its so nice to be able to be sad now.. and to listen to the music and actually feel feelings.. what a gift..

And Brockbaby.. I think it is so important to have images.. On another thread this morning there is a girl posting about Miami and CC and the hospital and her mom had given birth and relinquished in 1967 in the very same place I had.. I have an image in my mind of that hospital.. and thank goodness the CC gave me the hospital record.. It told me how long I was in labor etc..
All we want is information.. its all we can have when we know we can not get what happened back.. I do not think it’s a lot of ask.. and I wish records were open.. I wish with all my heart that there were no secrets and hiding and protecting with fines and jail.. and horrible things..


Coyote Lyrics
Artist: Joni Mitchell (Buy Joni Mitchell CDs)
Album: Hejira

No regrets Coyote
We just come from such different sets of circumstance
I'm up all night in the studios
And you're up early on your ranch
You'll be brushing out a brood mare's tail
While the sun is ascending
And I'll just be getting home with my reel to reel...
There's no comprehending
Just how close to the bone and the skin and the eyes
And the lips you can get
And still feel so alone
And still feel related
Like stations in some relay
You're not a hit and run driver, no, no
Racing away
You just picked up a hitcher
A prisoner of the white lines on the freeway


We saw a farmhouse burning down
In the middle of nowhere
In the middle of the night
And we rolled right past that tragedy
Till we turned into some road house lights
Where a local band was playing
Locals were up kicking and shaking on the floor



When I rode the bus from Boston to Miami knowing I was pregnant and knowing I had to tell mom and dad.. those lines just take me there.. I would look out the window in the night and see people just doing their lives.. and I was stuck in time.. lost in space.. waiting for it to happen..
Waiting for my life to catch up with me..

When I went to meet my bson more than 35 years later I went on the train across the upper part of the US.. and I stared out the window the same way.. I had a book but barely read it and I did not go on my laptop.. and I do not think I even listened to music.. I just stared..

Jackie