[jswing]

Hello Everyone,


I haven't posted in a long time. but I thought I'd update
and maybe get some advise.After a long journey I found
my birthson on Feb 22, of this year. I wrote the first letter and a week later he called. I was so excited and nervous, the first phone call went well. He also gave me
the ok..feel free to call anytime...I gave him the medical
history he despartly needed. He seemed to be very happy and shocked at the same time to know I was searching.

He thanked me for giving him life and also reasured me
that I did the right thing by giving him up for adoption.
which I am thankful for that...He also asured me he had
a perfect life growing up.

As of today, its been almost two months since I've heard
from him, although his wife has been e-mailing me. I do
appreciate that so much.

I understand he needs time to deal with all this on top of try to deal with everyday life too. I am very willing
to give him ALL the time and space he needs. But at
the same time its SO SO PAINFUL, I have waited 29 years to hear his voice and to see what he looks like.

If anyone has any advise or suggestions on what I should
do. Please feel free to do so...

jswing

[Montraviatommyg]

All I can suggest is be patient and keep lines of communication open with his wife, then he will know you're not just going to disappear.

Philippa

[snuffie]

Hi Jswing!

I am so happy for you that you finally found your bson. And I know how difficult it must be to be patient! It sounds as though you were the one that contacted him. He may just need some time to let everything "sink" in. He may never have thought that this would ever happen. And while he may be excited and happy, there is much for him to digest.

In my case, I was the "searcher." I contacted my bsiblings (bmom deceased) and it did take a while for everyone to work through feelings and emotions.

I agree with montraviatommyg - just give it some time. And continue communication with your son's wife.

Hugs
Snuffie

[nugget]

Congrats!!!!

You said he "gave the ok.....call any time......"
Is there a reason why you haven't? Maybe just a call to check in?

And as others have said to be patient. And it sucks.....waiting really sucks. Allowing him to come to you will give him the feeling that he has some control in the relationship and I know for me that would have been important.....to feel some control.

Was he searching for you as well?

Wendy