[Cary]

A match was made through the Wv state mutual consent registry and my bmom and I have had the hour of counseling that is required by the state. We should receive each others name and contact info in the next couple of days. This is the problem. I found out that she wants to be as much a part of my life that I will allow her to be. How should I make contact? Letter VS. phone? What do I say if I call? Please help!

thank you

[TyeDye]

Hi Cary -

I am almost in the same boat as you providing my caseworker can get my current info on my Bmom.

I think when it comes to the point of contact, I would welcome a phone call. I have many questions that I will need to write down on paper so I dont forget. I will have 35 years to get caught up on. I dont think it would happen in one phone call or letter.

I feel for you as I know I will be nervous, but I think that is ok. When ou contact your Bmom, you will already know half the question, "Does she want to contact me?" YES! I would think that might make it alittle easier. Good Luck! - Eric

[Tink1965]

Cary,

Congrats on the mutual consent! This is really exciting.

I am with TyeDye, I would make a phone call with notes written down with your questions. Then when or if there is silence, you will have something to fall back on. It is such a wonderful feeling to hear that voice that you have always thought of in the back of your mind. It is a moment that I will never forget. After our conversation, I sat down and had written everthing we talked about. I am glad I did, I have reread it a hundred or more times.

You are off to a terrific start! Keep us posted and let know how it goes.



Tink

[Cary]

Thank you all so much for your input. On the day that I received the information I sent out a letter that had been written and rewritten along with a picture of me and my family. The next evening she called me. Imagine my surprise to hear my voice on the other end of the line. She hadnt received my letter yet but she said that she couldnt wait. We set up a time for sunday to meet at her house with my husband and children and all of her family. It is amazing that after 34 years that I found the one who sounds like me,has some of the same interests, and has basicly the same personality as me. Is that awesome or what! The last several days have been spent on a rollercoaster of emotions and sit and cry tears of joy for no reason. She called me the following day and said that I look just like her and her twin. I cant wait to meet them.
To Eric: have faith and be patient. The social worker had difficulty finding me also. I had move a few times and my phone number had changed. But they found me at my place of employment. They will find her and make contact. Best wishes.

[MuyLaBonita]

Wonderful Wonderful news!! Congrads!!!!!!!

[Tink1965]

Cary...
Just wanted to say how happy I am for you
Sure hope that today went well, you will have to let us know how it went!
Big (((Hugs))) to you!

Tink

[l-thompson]

Wow Cary!! Every happiness to you as you build this special relationship with your birthmother and family.

It is pretty awesome isn't it to finally look at people that you are biologically related too!! I was 40 years old before I had the pleasure of doing just that and it was so incredible as I found my birthmother, birthfather and three full siblings. There are so many similiarities between us four children its just incredible. Mind you we do come from the same parents so I shouldn't be surprised at all!!

Heres to a long and happy future - hope it all works out wonderfully for you - Congratulations

[TyeDye]

Hi Cary -

I have not been on this thread in a couple days and I have just reas the news. I am so happy for you! Please keep us informed on how things go. Wow! In hearing this, it gives me good vibes on what I could experience real soon. KIT

Eric

[Cary]

This is all so amaZing! I met my bmom and my father (not biological) and my brother. OMG!!! It is so amazing that I look jsut like them! This last Sunday we met again and met some of the extended familiy. Everyone was so happy and I dont know who cried more...my bmom or me! The entire family has opened their hearts and homes to my family. My bmom said that she started searching for me when I was about 18 but has aggressively searched for about 8 years. This is the most wondeful thing that has happened to me since the birth of my children. Mothers day was wonderful and we look forward to many more special times together. My brother and I have talked on the phone and have visited. He and his family are so wonderful. We look forward to developing a close relationship that is long overdue. Best of luck to everyone. Never give up. Things happen for a reason and there is a time and place for everything. When the time is right things will happen.

God Bless and keep faith!
Cary