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Originally Posted By JAM

I just found this board today! I have a question to pose to the group. We have one child adopted internationally (21 months) and one child adopted in an open adoption here in the US (3 months). We have an open relationship with the birthmom and her family. They have been to our house to visit once and we continually send pictures and talk via email and telephone calls. I have a scrapbook started for each of our sons. At first I was going to put ALL of the adoption related info and pictures in that scrapbook. However, then I began thinking that perhaps when he is older he would not want EVERYONE who looks at his scrapbook to know all about his adoption story. So, then another adoptive mother suggested that they just kept all pictures, adoption documents, etc in a safe deposit box and will get them out when the child is ready or old enough. I am not sure what is best. I was thinking maybe to do a separate scrapbook and include all pictures of the birthmom, adoption documents, emails, pictures from when the birth family visits, ect. That way he would have a separate book all about his adoption story. What do you guys think?? I would love to hear what you have done and how you are dealing with this?????
Thanks so much!!
Feel free to contact me wee272@yahoo.com

[Archive]

Originally Posted By an idea

I have struggled with the same logistics. I finally decided include everything --- letters, bfamily pictures and stuff. However, I decided that the scrapbook would be a 3 ring binder. I have the pages ready that show placement day and his birthfamily, but I have not put them in the scrapbook yet for the same reason that you mentioned. My child is really small, and right now his scrapbook is enjoyed more by adults and others. When he is an older toddler, I plan to look at the pages with him so he "read" his story, but as far as leaving the book around the house with his papers and placement pictures in it ---- I want him to have some control over what other people see and know and want him to participate in the decision whether he saves those pictures as something special for himself or shares them with others. We have an open adoption so I can imagine that he will probably regard birthfamily pictures as a natural part of his life.

[Archive]

Originally Posted By bmother

I think that each child should have there own seperate scrapbook. But I think that you should start showing them this at a very young age instead of waiting like the other mother told you. This is their life story & it should not be witheld from them.