[momily]

I made the phone call to DS's birth grandma today when I explained who it was she started to cry and say "Thank you Jesus" over and over. She seemed like a very sweet lady (doesn't suprise me since DS is so sweet).

She was thrilled when I asked to meet, and we set a tentative date for next Saturday -- My plan is to pick her up and take her somewhere for lunch or an early dinner depending on when I can get childcare for DS. Now I have 2 more questions.

1) I don't have a car right now, since we live in the city where it's not needed, but I don't see asking an 80 year old lady to come with me on a bus somewhere. So my options are either to catch a cab and have the driver keep his meter running while I go in to the assisted living residence and pick her up, or to hire a car and driver for the day. I was thinking that the latter would be better because then I can give her an exact time, and she'd be more comfortable -- or would it feel like showing off. Similarly I was thinking of taking her someplace really nice but worry that that would come across as showing off too. What do you think?

2) Anyone have a list of questions to ask? Things DS would want to know but that he wouldn't think to ask now (he's 8). People suggested good things in the post below but most of them are things I already know (e.g. can I have a picture of birthmom, do I have medical history etc . . . ).

Any other advice would be much appreciated.

[rredhead]

Hey!

About the car, you can rent one for the day from Budget or something like that. Some cities also have rental cars by the hour. You can reserve them from a particular time - the person before you goes to where you are, then you take the car and drive to where the next person is. I think that's how it works, anyway.

Google "car rental by the hour" and you will find companies that do this.

Good luck!

[HBV]

I think I'd do the car service for the day so that you don't have to worry about trying to talk to her and deal with city traffic at the same time. Schlepping baby to the rental place, dealing w/ traffic when you don't normally drive while you're meeting her for the first time just seems like a recipe for an accident. It just seems more practical to me to have a driver----you can always explain to her that you wanted to be able to focus on talking to her and not on traffic.

I'd probably just pick someplace you'd normally go---or ask her if she has a favorite place she'd like to visit.

[momily]

Thanks,

Just to clarify -- it's been so long since I've driven that I'm not sure I'd be comfortable doing it in such an emotional situation combined with a part of the city I don't know well.

Also, DS isn't coming with me this time -- unless this meeting is a disaster I will set up a meeting with him along, but this time I'm going alone.