[luvsom]

I have three kids already and am pregnant again. I do not want anymore children and neither does my husband. We had both agreed to do adoption. My husband and I have recently separated but are still married. He is in Las Vegas and I have moved to Oregon with our children. He has been in trouble for child abuse twice now and is currently in jail and might be serving 2 to 5 years prison time. He blames his mistakes on me and blames me for him being in jail because I pressed charges on him. Now that he is in jail he is saying that he refuses to sign the adoption papers. The adoption agency I am going through keeps giving me the run around about what needs to be done. My worker keeps telling me to try to talk to him and see if he will change his mind. With him being in jail the only way I can talk to him is if he were to call. He has been away for two months now and still havent recieved a call. So what do I need to do or who do I need to talk to? Should I do a private adoption or is it all the same? If anyone could please help me Id appreciate it greatly.

[Searching_03256]

What Agency are you working with? And is there any chance that you are going to be divorced by the time the baby is born?

-Scott

[luvsom]

The agency I am with is Adoptions of Southern Oregon. Since I just moved to Oregon less than 2 months ago, I have to have a six month residency to be able to file for a divorce. So the baby will come before then.

[lovestory]

Maybe if you feel you aren't getting the answers to your questions by the agency you are working with now, you should consider calling a different agency, or maybe an adoption lawyer.

I know someone who used to work in adoptions in Oregon, a few years back, if there is any questions you would like me to ask, I can.

Also, with your husband being charged with child abuse, and doing jail time, maybe his rights can be terminated by the courts?

Good luck!
Stephanie

[Searching_03256]

Your agency may or may not be giving you the run around, but it might just be that your facts are limiting the adoption choices for right now.

For ANY adoption to be completed in Oregon, private (independent) or agency, in which you have a legal father, HAS to have the consent of the legal father or meet a specific law exempting his consent.

In very general terms, the exemptions are:

1 - You have been awarded sole custody in a divorce proceeding AND a hearing is had AND the court thinks your consent should be enough. (This is very rare by itself and often used in conjunction with 4 or 5 below).

2 - The child is under the care of DHS or an approved child caring agency.

3 - The child is under the care of another state's equivalent to DHS.

4 - The parent is mentally ill (as determined by a court) or the parent has been in jail for more than 3 years AND the court thinks that termination would be in the best interest of the child.

5 - The parent has deserted or neglected the child for one year before filing the adoption.

6 - The parent is not actually the biological parent as proven by another court hearing.

Please understand that I don't know all of the facts of your case and cannot give you specific legal advice about your case without knowing all those facts. With what was given, it just may not be possible for you to have an adoption be completed until/unless one of the above actually happens. THIS DOES NOT MEAN THAT THERE ARE NOT ALTERNATIVES AS THERE DEFINATELY ARE. There can still be placement decisions made under these facts but they have to be done carefully and with a full understanding by all parties involved.

Parents in your situation need some very knowledgable legal assistance. You are not dealing with the normal situation that an agency deals with and they just plain might not understand all the rules. Please make sure that one of the services that the agency is providing you with in a case like this is adequate legal counsel.

-Scott