[joskimo]

Originally Posted by momtutu

We do a lot of bouncing, brushing, and compression therapy with him. His OT taught us these techniques in order to help him cope when over stimulated. We also have a weighted vest that he used to wear at daycare that helped during high stress moments.

We just borrowed a weighted vest and blanket from the EI program but I'm not sure that they are helping. Maybe I'm not doing it right, they said on the vest only for 15 minutes every hour and a half, but I didn't see a big difference.

She just got kicked out of daycare again, this is 2 in 2 months. We've got until the end of the month, but it's still so troublesom, how do I explain all this to a new provider. I'd like to take her to a center this time, thinking that the environment will be better, more stimulating can be a bad thing but it can also be a good thing. Of course the centers I want her in all have waiting lists, so we'll see, I may have to take leave from work.

[qs mom]

My son wears a weighted vest all day at school. You need to really observe with them. His first OT didn't want to use one. She saw some kids 'rebound' when they took the vest off. My son thankfully, doesn't rebound.

I would suggest doing some research. Print out some things to give to a potential caregiver. Discuss it with them. Ask if they will be able to meet these needs.

I'll look for the site I had gone too. I printed the list of things, I highlighted my son's delays, reactions and behaviours, what would cause, them etc.

[Cristi727]

I am probably going to the only group that could possibly understand what I am feeling. My adopted 10 year old son lived his first 7 years as almost a feral child, completly neglected and abused. He was with us for three years and has been diagnosed with SID. He doesn't understand boundries, and what is appropriate behavior. I just got a call from his principle and he was mimicking a dog humping someones leg but on a girls arm. He knew it would make others laugh, but didn't realize what he was exactly doing wrong. Needless to say he is facing major consequences. But, should I punish his behavior? I just don't see how that will help him. He needs to have a talk with both my husband and I explaining about how body parts are special and to be treated with respect. I just feel embarrassed, upset, sad, hurt and many other emotions I can't even express. Any words of advice, support, and prayers are needed. Thank you.

[qs mom]

I just burst out laughing. Please don't be offended. I'm laughing because my son just did this to me this week!

And something I learned about 2 years ago, it REALLY helps to laugh.

My son is a little younger, he's just 6. When I asked him what he was doing, he told me he was humping like Missy does. I really didn't want to get into the sexual implications, he wouldn't understand anyway. So, I asked him if he was a dog? He said NO. I told him to stop acting like one. I also told him that doing that was disrespectful to me and if he ever did it again there would be consequences.

Does he trust you? That's the first important thing. Then maybe start with were did he see this? I know it was my sister's dog - Missy. Why did he do it? It was just to imitate and get a laugh, let him know it isn't funny and it's inappropriate. If it was because it felt good - explain privacy.

Good luck!

[joskimo]

Originally Posted by q's mom

My son wears a weighted vest all day at school. You need to really observe with them. His first OT didn't want to use one. She saw some kids 'rebound' when they took the vest off. My son thankfully, doesn't rebound.

I would suggest doing some research. Print out some things to give to a potential caregiver. Discuss it with them. Ask if they will be able to meet these needs.

I'll look for the site I had gone too. I printed the list of things, I highlighted my son's delays, reactions and behaviours, what would cause, them etc.

thanks for the advice, we're intervewing providers next week, on the pohone everyone says they can handle her behaviors, but we'll see - I"m bringing her with me just so they can get a dose of her. Plus I'm taking the last week of the year off - I figure where ever we start January perhaps during that week I'm off we can pay short visits so that day 1 isn't too much of a big deal. Your list would be grat, I haven't found a real comprehesive web site yet really.

[momtutu]

Something else that may help is a bean bag chair. My son's therapist suggested it and it helped a lot. If he needed a time out for behavior or just a quiet moment his nurse (special needs daycare) would put him in the chair with the vest on. His OT explained that being surrounded by the chair helps him to reconnect with his body. My son's sensory problems are mostly spacial. He loses track of where his body is in space. This causes him high stress and he reacts with screaming and hitting. We also have a bean bag at home. Dimmed lights seem to help and soft music. He wears his vest during times of high stimulation like loud play time, out shopping ect... The first time we went to the zoo he screamed for five hours. He screamed himself hoarse. I felt so helpless. Nothing I did soothed him. Now I know that he needs his vest and short periods of stimulation. Especially if we are doing anything new. Then we come straight home to quiet time with the vest and a blankie in his room. Most of the time, this works. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. This too will pass and our kids are so worth it!

[joskimo]

I love the bean bag chair idea, of course will have to buy one for my 12 year old too, she's wanted one forever.

We don't see anything happening from the vest, not sure if we should give it back or not. I"m off work next week so I'm going to see if we can keep borrowing the weighted items for that week.

We also dim the lights at home for an hour before bed time to help her cool down.

Today I start interviewing new daycare people. Everyone says they're up to it on the phone, but I don't know. She's a handful that daughter of mine.

[joskimo]

we had our visit fromt he Early Intervention person yesterday, last week she went to daycare and Hannah was way out of control, so our specialist got that view, now, of course, she thinks Hannah is like that all the time, which she isn't, but it finally got me my OT referral that I wanted. The OT came over yesterday too and taught me the brushing protocol. I'm not going to start until Saturday because I have to do it every 2 hours and can't do it today through Friday during the day. I"m off work next week so will be able to keep up w/ the brushing fora full week and a half. Then if all goes right she'll start care at the center across the street from my office and I can brush her at my morning and afternoon breaks.

[Barksum]

We also have a Ds who was dx'd as "probable dysfunction of sensory integration". He was also drug/alcohol exposed prenatally. Additionally he was seriously neglected during the first year of life. We believe that he has FAE (fetal alcohol effect). He did also have some minor attachment difficulties when he moved to our home, but we believe that these have resolved.

We found that "The Out of Sync Child Has Fun" was very helpful in giving ideas of activities to do with our son. We also opted to go to a private OT, not the one with Early Intervention. Nothing against EI, but we felt that our needs were more specfically met by going to the outside OT. (We had to pay for this out of pocket, but it was/is worth it.)

Ds could not stand to be touched. He reacted to his clothing in a negative way, always had rashes and was generally uncomfortable in his body. Being very young he wasn't able to TELL us about it. He was able to talk, but with the processing problems he has he could not relate what he was feeling to us in a verbal way, so he "acted out". He tantrummed and screamed alot for the first 3 years he was with us. (from age 2 through 5)

He is doing much (much!) better now (age 8) but still is easily frustrated and/or overwhelmed. He seems to take a bit longer to process information in general, but not in a "Wait...I'm slowly thinking...." kind of way. It's hard to describe, but when he's overwhelmed with incoming info he will start getting a bit hyper and fall apart over little things. Such as cry when told to brush his teeth, that kind of thing.

He liked small areas, that were semi-dark. Boxes, having a blanket over a table to make a "fort" or "tent", that kind of thing. He preferred to sleep in a "nest" of his blankets, not flat on his mattress with the blankets over him. We also put a blanket between the top and bottom bunk and he would sleep in the darkened tent.

He disliked anything sticky, tacky, or gooey. He disliked being touched (hugged, having his hand held, wrestling (!!!), etc.) We had to remove all the labels from his clothing (NOW they come out with the label-less clothes!), his socks had to be thin enough to not have nasty seams digging into his toes, cuffs and waistbands had to be monitored so they weren't too tight, etc.

I had one mother of kids with SI tell me that she gauged how to touch a child with SI problems by how they touched her. So if a child touched her with a feather light touch, that is how THEY liked to be touched. If a child grabbed on tight, that was how they preferred to be touched. We found this to be true. Ds touches us lightly...which is kind of freaky at times! LOL Having a little hand reach out and feather-touch your arm in the middle of the night can really boost the adrenaline.
This mom also said that she bought the longer legged one piece swim suits in a size smaller than the child was to help with compressing the child's torso, much the same idea as wrapping a child tightly and somewhat the same as a weighted vest. I think she also said she used dance tights as well. They make some lycra kinds that are smooth and compress the legs much like Sheer Energy pantyhose.

I have to admit (and this sounds really pathetic, but it's true) that the best thing that ever happened to our son was to have a little brother. Ds2 came to us he wasn't walking yet, but he could crawl everywhere. Ds1 would scream hysterically when Ds2 would turn in his direction. Ds2 would be 10 feet away, but Ds1 would perceive this as a possible threat and scream bloody murder. It was really difficult to live with at times. Ds2, being drug/alcohol addicted at birth, had his own issues, but not SI like Ds1.

Babies are a constant, in your face kind of presence, so Ds1 had many, many opportunities every day to work on his tactile defensiveness. Ds2 LOVED to hug, touch, kiss, play...Ds1 learned to adjust with time. I really am convinced that the reason Ds1 made so much progress in such a relatively short amount of time is because we could not prevent Ds2 from touching Ds1. Ds2 was small, though, so he couldn't really "hurt" Ds1, even though his touch was probably pretty firm! I think having the small little guy always crawling all over him and not being put off by Ds1's crying, etc. helped Ds1 overcome many of his problems. That and the sensory diet stuff suggested in "The Out of Sync Child Has Fun".

Ds1 now has 3 younger siblings and gives/receives hugs all day. He no longer has the same tactile defensiveness that he had, and he's doing very well. He does, however continue to have some SI/FAE stuff that we deal with daily.

[mrsred]

I have just gotten the book"The Out of Sync Child". I cannot believe how well it is describing my son!

[momtutu]

I did not know there was a "sensory diet". I'll have to look into it. It may not be for us because one of my son's issue's is an oral aversion. He also does not like to have his face touched at all! I learn something new here every day.

[mrsred]

I haven't gotten all the way through the book wrong, and I could be wrong, but I beleive the sensory diet is not a "diet" of food per se, as it is a diet of sensations that help the child adjust and learn to acclimate.

[joskimo]

out-of-sync is next on my list - I'm reading "Sensational Kids: Hope and Help for Children with Sensory Processing Disorder" and cannot speak highly enough aobut it.

A sensory diet is regualr sensory activities through the day to keep your child on an even keel and help them from acting out do to their sensory needs. We just started brushing therapy 2 weeks ago, so that's H's sensory diet, we do it throughout the day. I just put her in a daycare next to my office so go over on my two breaks and do the therapy, it's working wonders.

[momtutu]

aaaahhhh! I get it. TEE HEE, my bad. Like I said "learn something new every day".

[funnymom]

Both of my sons were also born drug exposed. I am sure they have SI issues. I had them screened by early intervention. They agreed that they had sensory integration problems, but in our state they can not get services because they are developmentally on target. I am reading The Out of Sync Child and every other page I say "that's my boy".