[Malinda]

Hi! I am new to this, so please bear with me. I have been married for 9 wonderful years and have 2 biological children. We have suffered from infertility for nearly 4 years and have been waiting for our baby through LDSFS since January. It feels like an eternity already. I know my 2 children will keep me busy during the summer, but I feel as if I may burst before our baby arrives. Does anyone have suggestions on what they did during this waiting period? Also, I haven't called LDSFS asking what is going on with our case since I know they are busy already, but do you think it helps to "bug" them once in a while so they don't forget I'm still here?
Thanks

[ldsmilitarywife]

I, too, am quite anxious to here from LDSFS. We have only been approved for about a month but I feel like it has been forever. Since I don't have any children I also wonder how to pass the time. My husband and I decided to be foster parents while we are waiting. We haven't fostered a baby yet but we are very willing. This will give me something to do and give me experience. As to bugging them? I don't know. I would like an answer to that question as well. But I just remind myself that everything will work out according to God's will. This is a time for me to learn patience. Good luck with your adoption.

[LaurelJ]

Both of our children were adopted through LDSFS and while we were waiting we had follow up appointments with our caseworker to touch base and discuss any concerns. These were scheduled for every three months during our wait time. Maybe they are not doing this anymore? I liked it because it kept me from calling and asking because I knew I would have an opportunity to talk with them in the near future. If they are no longer scheduling these meetings, I think it is perfectly reasonable to call periodically and ask if there are any changes or just ask for an update. I wouldn't call every week but every couple of months should be okay...... It keeps you in their minds also which can't be a bad thing......

Malinda.... I am assuming you are doing an International Adoption since you already have two children???

Good luck to you both!

[Malinda]

We are adopting in the US, since international adoption gets so expensive with the travel expences and all. We are under "special need" which will place us with "non-caucasian" or a mild problem.

[ctrcar]

Malinda,

I'm curious when you include "non-caucasion" with special needs. Although they did at one time, I believe LDSFS no longer considers trans-racial adoptions to be special needs. From what I understand, special needs would be something like a health or medical issue or a non-newborn.

We have two children already as well, so when we decide to adopt again we'll be in the same boat as you. I've decided to be as proactive as possible during the wait in order to increase our odds of placement, including putting our profile online at both providentliving.org and hopetoadopt.com, and letting all our friends and relatives know that we want to adopt again so they can let us know of any potential situations. With our first two, I was content to sit back and let the agency present us but I won't have that luxury with subsequent adoptions.

Best of luck!

[dave&monika]

My husband and I are also playing the waiting game. The days, weeks and months seem to drag on. My emotions are going crazy, one minute I am so excited and another I am a little scared. I have found that taking my mind off things by learning something new makes it easier. I recently started to embroider a wallhanging for the birthmom who chooses us. I have also started to learn to paint with water colors. I try anything to take my mind off the waiting.

Good luck to you!
monika

[Malinda]

Thanks for your comments Monica! It always helps to hear that none of us are alone in this. What a great idea to cross stitch something for the birth mother. Good luck to you! You will be a great Mom!
Malinda

[ladybuglady]

Hello,

Another good way to pass the time is by working on your family history. There is so much on the internet now that it makes it easier than years past, plus you can get access to church ordinance records if you have your membership number and confirmation date. I had some work that had already been done but some of the ordinances were missing, like the sealing to parent or spouse, so now we get to go complete the work. It has helped me pass the time and meet new cousins at the same time.

Good luck!

Lady bug lady

[aspenhall]

Awesome suggestions everybody! As soon as I finish this dang homestudy (or I should say as sson as hubby does) I'll probably have more time on my hands. I will definately do a cross stich for the birth parents and I already help my F.I.L. do our family history. BTW doeas an adopted child have double the family history to do? hee hee

[ladybuglady]

Hi,

I think it is really up to you or them if they want to do a double family history line. I read in an article or something by a member of the church that said that once they are sealed, the line that should be followed is the adopted line. I think that that is probably because I heard a quote once that I will have to find that was from a member of the 12 who said that once the adoption is sealed that some literal changes can take place, their blood becomes your blood. I had never heard that before so I thought that was really interesting.

Again, so happy for you and the 2 little ones!

Best wishes!

Lady bug lady