[TheHappyHippie]

Deb,

Thank you so much, this is really helpful. I actually already have a wonderful letter from my birthmother that I think actually came with me when I was adopted. I don't think it has any info that I could use to my advantage, but perhaps there are more letters that I don't know about. I would love any other help you could offer, thank you SO much. I do know some details about my birthparents, though I'm not sure how much help it would be.

-Aari

[sjdodge]

Deb,
Just read through all the posts in this link. I am a bmom iso a son, born 3 Jan 1982, in Fayetteville, NC. I placed my son in LDSS in May 1982 after trying to care for him myself without the support of my family or church. I am not bitter towards the church or LDSSS in anyway, just want to reunite with a much missed and loved first born. He was placed through Charlotte, NC office and I was told he could have gone anywhere in the east. Do you have any recommendations? Thank you.
Sandi

[Juliana13]

Originally Posted by sjdodge

Deb,
Just read through all the posts in this link. I am a bmom iso a son, born 3 Jan 1982, in Fayetteville, NC. I placed my son in LDSS in May 1982 after trying to care for him myself without the support of my family or church. I am not bitter towards the church or LDSSS in anyway, just want to reunite with a much missed and loved first born. He was placed through Charlotte, NC office and I was told he could have gone anywhere in the east. Do you have any recommendations? Thank you.
Sandi

Have you contacted the Charlotte office? They should have your info. They can get non-id info (usually for a fee) but if your son were ever to look for you, that would be where he would go. So you need to make sure yuor info there is up-to-date, maybe put a letter in your file with your information, so he can get it if/when he begins to search. They can also tell you if he or his adoptive parents have left contact information for you. LDSSS (now LDSFS) has a policy that they will not give out contact info unless they have express permission from the other party to release it. So you may want to give them that permission (they may have a form for you to fill out) so they can give that info to your son if he ever comes asking. They do not search for you, they only pass along information they have permisison to pass along.

Otherwise, you will have to search in more traditional ways - with search angels, PIs, etc - those in the general "Search and Reunion" forums would have good ideas for you.

[geogdeb]

Sandi,

Sorry it has taken me so long to write back. Yes you should contact LDSFS in North Carolina. They will send you your Non-ID for $50.00. You may have to stay on top of them though. Also ask them to send you consent-to-contact forms. Then register online everywhere you can.

I do know that the agencies try and place the babies in the areas the are served by the local LDSFS. That might help you narrow things down. I was in the same boat and the only reason I found my son was because the laws changed in the state that I gave birth in. And it might happen in N. Carolina too. Hopefully things in the adoption industry are changing. I will keep an eye out for your son's bdate. If you just need someone to talk to pm me. I will help as much as I can.

Deb

[SuddenlySusan]

Originally Posted by TheHappyHippie

Hi all, I'm new, so bear with me.
I'm going through a battle with LDSSS myself, I'm an adoptee, and while I will not actually discredit LDSSS (they gave me the wonderful life I have now), I am also trying to make contact with my birthparents, and not really receiving any real assistance. I can't afford the $50 fee for my non-ID info, and to be honest, I don't really want it anyway if it isn't going to help me actually MEET my birthparents. Has anyone out there actually had any success with the non-ID info? Has it helped you in anyway? Basically, is it even worth the $50?? Thanks for any help.

-Aari

Hi, Aari...

I'm a first mother, reunited with my son Jan 2007. He got his non-id info and searched for me for a long time. I didn't know I "was allowed" to search for him. Finally, in January of this year, I made up my mind that I was going to find him, no matter what, and no matter how long it would take. I "googled" LDS adoption and found this web site (elapsed time = two minutes).

I found the reunion registry on this site and entered three pieces of information: date of birth, gender, and state of birth, and clicked on the search button. I got two matches (elapsed time = two seconds). The first match was from the daughter I raised, who posted my profile on this site in 2000. The second match was posted in 2005 from "an adoptee" who was searching -- and it was my son!

I called my daughter, who acted as intermediary and she sent an email through the "contact" option on the registry. The first thing my son did was to find his non-id info and asked questions from the information he had to compare notes. It was all he had to go on. He knew we were a match when he was able to compare notes. The $50 non-id fee is cheaper than a DNA test, and the information can help you sort out those persons who are seeking but may not be a match.

The most important thing is to post your profile everywhere you can. The second most important thing is to KEEP YOUR CONTACT INFO UPDATED. When my son posted here in 2005, my daughter's contact info from 2000 was no longer good. When my son posted his profile on this site he figured it was just a "random" posting.

When I finally got the courage to "buck the system" and look for my son, my search only lasted two minutes and two seconds, although I had been aching for him almost 36 years. My son said, "It's been a long time coming, but we found each other."

Best wishes,
Susan