[LJR1974]

I have not adopted from Korea, but we are thinking about it a great deal for DC #3.

So I ran into a friend today that had started the adoption process for S. Korea in July 07, but then had to stop before receiving a referral because of an unexpected pregnancy.

As a mom to a wonderful adopted son myself, I eagerly asked when they were planning on starting their adoption again. Their bio daughter will be 1 in Sept, so they'll be eligible to begin again then (as far as I know).

She said she didn't know, that they're playing it by ear (understandable, esp given their daughter was a preemie). She said they had thought about waiting a few years and then adopting a sibling set.

I thought, first of all, that Korea is planning on ending int'l adoptions in 2012. Waiting a few years wouldn't be recommended. And sibling set? I didn't think there are sibling sets available. I thought if you adopted siblings, it was either b/c 1. they're twins, or 2. you adopt 1 child, then get a "sibling placement call" 1-several years later.

I know FOR CERTAIN they're adopting from Korea. We talked about it a lot. It's not like I'm confusing it w/ another country.

Am I totally wrong?

[Max'smom]

Hi,
Perhaps she is thinking of switching countries or is not aware of these facts of Korean adoption - you are right that sibling sets aren't available except in the case of twins or a sibling call.

[umichlori]

Siblings are RARELY available, but it has and does happen. Twins are rare in Asian populations in general, so twin referrals are extremely rare in adoption.

Korea is not definitely closing adoptions in 2012, but they are slowing them down considerably already. I am under the impression it is a best guess that adoptions would phase out by then, but that has not been announced by Korea.

HTH.

[LJR1974]

She wasn't considering switching countries. Her dh has two sisters from Korea. I know that when they decided to adopt it was important to them (or at least very meaningful) that their child would share that background with their aunts.

My best guess is she doesn't know much about the process.... which is just incredible to me. While adopting from Guatemala I knew the process in and out.

Thanks for confirming what I already knew. I did know sibling calls are rare. I am just wondering where in the heck my friend got her ideas...?

Here's an article I found mentioning 2012.
Korea Aims to End Stigma of Adoption and Stop ‘Exporting’ Babies - NYTimes.com

[bixb]

Maybe cut your friend some slack - they may not be as naive as you think.

umichlori is correct: sibling placements are possible (but rare) and the Korean 2012 plan is not definite.

Korea does permit adoption of sibling groups - usually those that are hard to place (special medical conditions, older children, etc.). See Holt International's Waiting Child program for Korea.

If your friend has an application from 2007 they are highly likely to be grandfathered in, even if int'l adoptions are phased out in 2012, and will be matched with a child. Korea has given no indication that they will reverse existing applications, but rather that their plan is to slow down and eventually stop new ones.

As for the 2012 plan, there are announcements of Korea planning to phase out international adoption in the 1990s as well, and it didn't happen. Russia has similar goals, as do many countries.

While Korean domestic adoptions are up, they are not rising at a fast enough rate for international adoptions to cease (unless a decision is made for these children to not be adopted at all). Korean has been exploring various ways of increasing domestic adoption, such as changing the age requirements. It is also unclear how the declining Asian economy will affect domestic adoptions in Korea and what this will mean for the government's plan.

[Max'smom]

Hi,

I beg to differ on sibling sets. In the past 4.5 years since I started working on my Korean adoption (my son has been home 3 years now, I am certain that there have never been sibling sets adopted at the same time through Holt or their waiting child photo listing, except in the rare case of twins. If you look on the very active Holt bulletin board, you will find that the only sibling adoptions occur as "sibling calls," that is, when you adopt a child and then are later called out of the blue after the birth mom has placed a second child for adoption. Also, if you look carefully at the Holt Korea country criteria it states repeatedly "child," and the ages for the child are 9 months to 20 months at time of placement. There are rarely older children available, except individual toddlers through the special needs program. We specifically asked about sibling sets when we started our adoption and were told that Holt does not not even allow people to adopt while the are pregnant. They believe in placing no more than 1 child at a time (except in the rare case of twins) because first, each child has already suffered a great loss (the loss of their birth mom, plus the loss of their foster family and home country) and needs to be the center of attention for at least a year from the arrival of another child and second, Korea frowns on the placement of older children (e.g. healthy toddlers and older) in foreign countries because they see this as too great a culture shock and have seen it as leading to poor outcomes.

[umichlori]

Regardless of whether any particular agency has placed them, sibling sets are extremely rare but do exist from Korea. I know of one personally, and it was not a sibling call, they were adopted together at the same time.

[bixb]

I recently checked several adoption agency websites for Korea that say siblings sets are rare - not impossible. Some said extremely rare. Regardless of the debate here, we all seem to agree that this is by no means a common event.

[cthy757]

Originally Posted by Max'smom

Hi,

I beg to differ on sibling sets. In the past 4.5 years since I started working on my Korean adoption (my son has been home 3 years now, I am certain that there have never been sibling sets adopted at the same time through Holt or their waiting child photo listing, except in the rare case of twins. If you look on the very active Holt bulletin board, you will find that the only sibling adoptions occur as "sibling calls," that is, when you adopt a child and then are later called out of the blue after the birth mom has placed a second child for adoption. Also, if you look carefully at the Holt Korea country criteria it states repeatedly "child," and the ages for the child are 9 months to 20 months at time of placement. There are rarely older children available, except individual toddlers through the special needs program. We specifically asked about sibling sets when we started our adoption and were told that Holt does not not even allow people to adopt while the are pregnant. They believe in placing no more than 1 child at a time (except in the rare case of twins) because first, each child has already suffered a great loss (the loss of their birth mom, plus the loss of their foster family and home country) and needs to be the center of attention for at least a year from the arrival of another child and second, Korea frowns on the placement of older children (e.g. healthy toddlers and older) in foreign countries because they see this as too great a culture shock and have seen it as leading to poor outcomes.

Just an FYI --- Although it's EXTREMELY rare, sibling group adoption from Korea has happened. I'm thinking of a family last year from a Holt Korea child placing agency that adopted a 1 and 2-year-old boy/girl sibling group at the same time (not a sibling call). My boys have now been home 3 years & 5 years from two different adoptions from Korea. I've only known of one maybe two families to do this in 6.5 years that I've been involved in international adoption. The bottom line is that I wouldn't adopt from Korea expecting to adopt sibling groups.

Cathy
Post Adoption Moderator on that other heavily active bulletin board....

[LJR1974]

Thank you all, for basically confirming what I already knew. I sent friend an email letting her know that there is heavy speculation Korea will end (or try to end) international adoption in 2012, and that siblings are not generally available. She had no clue.

I guess people have their different styles and coping mechanisms. I like to research furiously, she must like to leave the details to others.

She thanked me and said they should definitely get in touch with their social worker, as it had been awhile.

We are trying to decide whether to proceed or not. We have an agency chosen, and are technically able to start April 15 (by then both ds's will have been in our home for 1 year) but we don't have the funds saved up. We'd either have to take out a loan, or wait and save and risk the program slowing down or closing. *sigh* Hard decisions.

[bixb]

Glad you were able to give your friend some guidance.

As you have done a lot of research you probably already know this, but just in case - we found that some agencies require payment up front whereas others are more of a pay-as-you-go, where the biggest payments do not occur until you get a referral. If you have this option with an agency in your area, that may help with costs. We have found this to be a big help.