[adoptkoreablog]

Yeah, I've been officially announced.

I have a question for parents who have already adopted from Korea or have already started the process. Why did you choose to adopt from Korea?

(I would like to use some of your responses in my blog. I will not use names. If you don't want your answer to be a part of my blog, please make sure you tell me.)

I thought this would make a good starting point for people who are still trying to decide.

Personally, I decided to adopt from Korea when I was nine. We were waiting in the airport for my sister to arrive from Korea and I knew that I wanted to be the Mommy at the airport one day. I never deviated from that decision and I married a man who embraced my decision without question. Twenty some years later...there I was waiting at the airport waiting for my son.

What is your story? Please feel free to e-mail me or PM me if you would like to share, but don't want to post on the public forum.

Mo

[tinkerbell11599]

Mo,

We decided to adopt from Korea after really learning about the program from a social worker at our domestic agency. She mentioned that with Korea's program, the kids weren't in an institution but in a foster care program--one child per home and that the child could be escorted over (I'm deathly afraid to fly and was afraid that the child would pick up on my fears and have a harder time bonding with us). After we looked further into the Korea program and Korea itself we fell in love with it.

We made our decision on Mother's Day of 2004. We had the application in to our agency in mid August. We went through the homestudy process between mid August and Labor Day and had our son's referral one day before our 10th anniversary in mid September!! We accepted the referral after having our pediatrician review it a few days later.

Our son, Ryan, came to us April 14, 2005 and my delivery room was the JFK airport along with 3 other mommies. I "delivered" a nearly 20 pound, 10 1/2 month old healthy baby boy!! We could tell from the pictures that the foster family sent that he was well loved and we could tell that he was well taken care of.

My husband got a phone call from our adoption agency the morning of October 16, 2005. Ryan has a sister and they wanted to know if we wanted to adopt her as well. My husband called me from his cell phone in the car of his work's parking lot. My immediate answer through the tears was "yes". I had so many questions about her (her birthdate, her Korean name, her health and more).

When we finally got the referral we had our pediatrician review it. She's had quite a few health problems but that seems to have cleared up since she was placed in the same foster home that our son was. We know that she'll be well taken care of and loved just like our son was. And now we are just waiting for that phone call to go "deliver" our daughter and we're wondering which "hospital" we'll be delivering her at (she could come in one of three airports for us).

Ryan has his own picture from the referral picture that he carries around of his sister. He calls her "baby". He also has a copy of his own that he carries around as well.

Yes we'll have our hands full, particularly me since I'm a Stay at home mom, but we won't change that for the world to have these two beautiful children with us and share in their culture.

Jen

[ahfdragonfly]

DH & I had always talked about having children. After 2 years of no birth control, we started to pursue infertility stuff, & 2 years later & a failed IVF, we decided to take a step back & re-evaluate. Our ultimate goal was to be parents, and to raise & love children, not to be pregnant. I started looking into adoption before we got the pregnancy test back from the IVF. In my heart, I knew I wasn't pregnant. It took Mike a few weeks to recover from the IVF trauma, but having another goal in mind really helped me recover. My then bosses wife is a therapist & their 2 boys are adopted from the Phillipenes, so we met with them to discuss adoption options, as well as other couples we know who have adopted domestically. (Domestic was our original direction.) After some research & talking to various agencies, I knew I couldn't put my heart out for more risk that is often associated with domestic adoptions. I had had a couple 4-H-ers come through my club that were Korean adoptees, so I was kind of familiar with what they had gone through, and I knew that I would always have them & their families to talk to. I talked to a local agency that works with Korea about the process, age of children, time line, health of the children, & all of the things that go along with a Korean adoption. The escort option was also a big factor. We just couldn't put our lives on hold for weeks / months at a time to travel as often as some other countries require. I knew it was the right fit. The children are loved, the program is stable, the process was fairly easy, the cost reasonable, and the end result is a beautiful, loveable child in your arms. Knowing that she (he) will be yours, and not always looking over your shoulder, wondering if there is going to someone comming to take your / their child back, was a major factor for us. Wanna see me in a rubber room? If you survive trying to take my baby away from me, I would be in one. We needed the guarantee that we would have a child who was legally available for adoption, at the time of referral, and especially at the time of placement.

Will we adopt again? I don't know. After everything we went through to get to "here", I'm taking all the time I can to give all of me to CJ. If God wants me to have more children, then I guess He'll have to let me know when that time comes. Ane yes, it would be from Korea again. If a sibling becomes available? (That is so cool Jen!) I will move Heaven & Earth to bring that child home.

Feel free to use anything here & contact me if you need anything else, Mo.

Millie

[dcookie]

1) Babies in foster care not orphanages
2) Healthy, young babies
3) Excellent medical care
4) Smooth, well-oiled process
5) The Cuteness Factor
6) Linking ourselves to a part of the world where we had no previous links

To be honest, Korea was not initially on my mind. It only ended up in my consciousness after I'd been through a few research loops. But the more I read, the more it seemed like the gold standard for international adoptions.

Actually, No. 6 only occurred to me several months into the process. When I started reading a little cultural background and deciphering Hangul, it struck me how completely other a place it is - in my limited experience. It feels good to have a little footprint on the other side of the world, and I plan to visit there in a couple of years.

Sean

[sarajean]

When I was twelve years old I found out that my best friend was adopted (domestic) and another really good friend welcomed a younger sister from India the same year. I knew then that adoption was going to be a part of my life, but like many people I thought I would have a biological child first. When I met my dh he embraced my dreams of adopting, but we decided to try for a pregnancy first. We had stopped using birth control, and after 3 1/2 years without it we knew something was up. We had been moving a lot for his career (mostly optional moves, but it kept us on sort of a tour of New England) and we were terrible about going to doctors of any sort during that time. When we relocated back to our home state of NY we finally decided it was time to see a reproductive expert.

Before going to the RE we talked about how far we wanted to go to have a biological child...we decided that more than anything we wanted to be parents, and since adoption was always a part of the 'grand plan' we would not do IVF. We were both diagnosed with infertility, so IVF turned out not to even be an option. We started researching adoption avenues and quickly ruled out domestic (like Millie we feared the birthparents might have a change of heart, and open adoption, although it can be wonderful, was just not for us).

After the disappointments of infertility we wanted a program with a predictable timeline (and preferrably a short one), an escort option (dh is terrified of flying), and something we could afford. Korea seemed to be the safest and surest way to bring home a child in a reasonable amount of time. The more we reasearched about Korea the more we liked the history, culture, food, and geography...I love to travel and hope to make it to Korea one day. We liked that our child would be loved by a foster family before coming home, and that he'd receive wonderful health care as well.

For us the choice to adopt from Korea wasn't based on one or two strong points, rather it was a hundred little things that made the program a perfect fit. When we decide to add to our family it will be through adoption from Korea again.

[tutumom]

Mo,



My husband and I first talked about our mutual desire to adopt some 15 years ago. While neither of us were adopted, both of our lives have been touched significantly by family members who were, most notably my mom. We ended up starting our family 14 years ago with the birth of our daughter, followed 14 months later by the birth of our son. While I had always dreamt of having a large family, we got busy raising our first two children, and we ended up a family of four.



About seven years ago, I decided to go back to school to finish my nursing degree, and while working in my labor and delivery rotation, I was faced with a yearning to be a mommy again. I didn't necessarily want to be pregnant again, I just knew that our family wasn't complete yet. That desire has stayed with me for the last seven years and since my husband and I can no longer conceive naturally, we started talking about adoption again. We shied away from domestic adoption after having friends who suffered a heartbreaking experience. We thought that international adoption might be an option, so we started researching.



Born and raised in Hawaii, I actually grew up with a few friends who were Korean, and they exposed me to Korean food and culture at a young age. I have always found Korea to be a fascinating country, one rich with tradition and heritage. The fact that Korea has the oldest and most established adoption program provided some security as well. We found that Korea offered adult adoptees the greatest possibility of one day locating and reuniting with their birth parents; I think this is important, and I know that in countries such as China this is usually not a possibility. We have also appreciated the large number of adult Korean adoptees who are now sharing their experiences with a new generation of adoptive parents, there is so much to be gained from their wisdom. Another appealing aspect of the Korean adoption program is the number of resources available to Korean adoptees both here in the United States and Korea.



Basically, we felt like the Korean program was a perfect fit for our family and we are looking forward to all that lie ahead! I hope this helps.

[hopeful2adopt]

Sara,

I'm sending you a PM

Sharon

[LulubelNY]

We started out focused on a bio child. But after several miscarriages and ART attempts I decided it was more important to me to be a parent than a patient. At the same time, DH had been talking with a colleague who had adopted from Korea several times and was very happy with the program. We looked into it and liked many of the same things that appealed to others: the foster care situation as opposed to institutionalization; the availability of information about the birth parents; the relatively young age at which babies become available, the excellent medical care. We felt that all of these things gave us a good chance of adopting a healthy baby who would be able to attach securely. In addition, although some of the Korean government's requirements for adoptive parents may be a little restrictive, we liked that they care enough about the children to be selective about who gets them, and aren't just giving them away to any stranger with a 171.

Mo, I hope this helps. I'm really enjoying your blog, so thanks and keep up the good work!

[JackHenryEmma]

I have 2 bio sons (3 and 5 yrs). Our youngest has some health issues and dev delays due to a condition I had while pregnant. My husband and I still really wanted another child but were afraid to try again naturally. So we turned to adoption. First we looked into domestic adoption. However, all the agencies we contacted said my youngest son's issues would make it very unlikely a ** would select us. The figure we were given is 3 to 5 yr wait if ever for a mixed race child. We wanted our children close in age. So we decide to look at international adoption. We choose Korea for several reasons.

1. Healthy babies !!!!!!!
2. Foster care
3. Placed at a young age
4. The possiblilty for our daugther to connect with ** and bd someday
5. We were allowed to select a girl


Julie
Emma's Mom

[jujubeat]

1. We have a bio son (3), so we only considered countries that accepted travel from one parent or had a no travel option
2. new close friend is adopted from Korea and she's a beautiful, amazing person
3. new hair dresser is adopted from Korea and she's a beautiful, really sweet person
4. Korean adoptees suddenly started entering our lives, so we followed our gut
5. foster, as opposed to institution, care
6. medical system is similar to ours
7. faster timelines and not as much paperwork
8. need is clear

That's about it. We feel really good about adopting from Korea.

jj

[larz2002]

The first time I saw what I thought to be an child adopted from China, I went and told my fiance I wanted to adopt from China at some point. We had a biological son and when it came time to want to pursue the adoption we weren't old enough for China. I did not even know about Korea (funny because it is the longest running) came upon a website and decided we would go for Korea. I feel that I was led to Willow, from the day looking on that website we had our beautiful baby in 4 months and 4 days (4 is my lucky number) and she shares a birthday with my mom.

[ahfdragonfly]

Bumping up for sethsmommy