[DebJoe]

My husband and I are considering international adoption. We cannot travel do to his work schedule and a little one at home. Which countries will allow us to adopt without traveling there and how do I get info. on them?

[spaypets]

I really would encourage you to travel. It is so much better for the child if you see first hand the child's culture and can tell the child when he/she is older what their birth country was like. In addition, it is so much less stressful for the child to go from the caretaker to you without being handed off to an intermediary. The bonding starts immediately and I treasure the week we had with our daughter in the hotel, free from all our regular pressures.

I understand hesitation about travel. DH and I chose a country based in part on the fact that we could have the child escorted (this was in the fall of 2001 and we were worried about the state of the world). But the more I learned, the more I realized that if I couldn't put aside my fears and travel for my child, then I wasn't much of a mother.

Travel doesn't have to be a long and involved process. The time in some countries can be as little as a few days. Guatemala is about four days I think (I believe having your child escorted is an option). Korea and India are about a week or 10 days (you can have your child escorted from both those countries AND only one parent needs to go because the adoption is finalized in the US).

[becky]

Guatemala allows you to have your child escorted home. Of course it is only a 3 day trip (travel one, go to the embassy second, travel home 3rd)...so many families decide to do it themselves.

[joskimo]

Liberia and Ethopia escourts are preferred.

[sak9645]

... is Korea. However, Ethiopia also permits escort. Under some conditions, children may be escorted from Guatemala and India. A few other countries with small programs allow escort, but most do not.

Korea has been placing children with U.S. citizens for over 50 years, and has an extremely well organized and ethical program. The babies come home fairly young. The medical system in Korea is comparable to that in the U.S., and most of the children have received good care and have reliable records. The children are generally kept in well-supervised foster care settings, rather than orphanages. Adopting a boy is relatively quick; it may take somewhat longer to adopt a girl, because so many Americans want girls. You can not adopt unrelated children at the same time, and there is very limited availability of siblings (almost exclusively twins).

Korea has some of the strictest requirements for adoptive parents, however, and not all families will qualify. As an example, singles are not allowed to adopt, and couples must be married for at least three years before adopting. Korea wants young couples in the 25 to 44 age range, and it wants both spouses to be in excellent health. (A few programs even have weight restrictions.)

Unlike most countries, Korea does NOT allow you to work with an agency anywhere in the U.S. Korea insists that you work with an agency that has a contract with Korea to place children with families in your state, unless you wish to adopt a child with a significant special need. If you go to www.adoptkorea.org, you will find a state-by-state listing of agencies with Korea contracts. Most states have only one or two agencies that can place children from Korea, and you should be aware that a few states have none; families in those states can adopt only through the special needs program. Korea does not permit independent adoption or adoption through lawyers and facilitators.

The good news about Korea is that virtually all of the agencies with Korea contracts have been in business for a long time, and enjoy an excellent reputation. It is very hard to go wrong with a Korean adoption.

With Korea, you do not actually complete the adoption in Korea. The children are escorted under a decree of guardianship, and you adopt in your state. Your agency has the responsibility for assuring that you complete the adoption and comply with all legal requirements.

As far as Ethiopia, only five agencies in the U.S. are authorized by the Ethiopian government to place children from that country. You cannot use any other agency, and you cannot work with an attorney or a facilitator. You can use one of these agencies, regardless of where you live in the U.S. You can see a list of the authorized agencies on the website of the U.S. State Department.

Ethiopia is a very poor country that has been wracked by wars and famines; there are many children of all ages, including sibling groups, in need of homes. Some are in relatively good health, while others have special needs, including chronic Hepatitis B. Ethiopia is very liberal with regard to requirements for parents. Both married people and singles may adopt, and any age restrictions, length of marriage requirements, restrictions on the number of children already at home, and so on are usually imposed by an individual agency, not the country. Depending on the agency you use, you may be able to adopt unrelated children.

India is still placing children with Americans, but people who are not of Indian heritage may find it more difficult to complete an adoption these days. Some agencies that formerly worked with India are not doing so now because of problems in certain regions, where a combination of anti-adoption sentiment and charges of corruption have caused local governments to make adoption difficult. India's Central Adoption Resource Agency (CARA) has approved a number of American agencies to place children from that country, and you can find a list of those agencies on the CARA website. You cannot adopt using a private attorney or facilitator. Adoption of unrelated children at the same time is unlikely to be allowed.

Many Americans like to adopt from Guatemala, because many of the babies come home quite young and the trip is short for those who choose to travel (and most do). It is possible to adopt from Guatemala using an agency, an attorney, or a facilitator. Some agencies allow adoption of unrelated children at the same time. The country has very few restrictions with regard to age, marital status, and so on.

You might also check on the possibility of escort for Haiti, Liberia, and Sierra Leone. These programs, however, are small and have not always been stable.

Although you have these various options, I must tell you that I don't really recommend escort, and many adoption professionals don't either. Even Korea, which once insisted on escort because it felt that parents should be well rested and in a familiar place when receiving their children, now recognizes that travel is very desirable. There are, however, adoption professionals who do not recommend travel to countries in Africa, because of political instability and because accommodations are often very spartan.

When you travel to your child's country, you build memories of people and places that will be tremendously valuable as you strive to teach your child to honor and celebrate his/her birth heritage. And you absolutely MUST teach your child to value his/her birth culture. As the mother of a daughter from China, I know how many wonderful stories I have about the kindness of the Chinese people I met, about the love of the Chinese people for all things American, about various places I visited, and so on. I cannot imagine NOT having traveled to get my daughter.

Also, most married couples who travel together compare the experience to having Dad in the delivery room when a baby is born. I am a single woman, so I don't have first-hand knowledge, but virtually every married person I've met has described the experience of traveling with a spouse to adopt a child as tremendously marriage-enriching.

Most families are somewhat inconvenienced by travel requirements, but most manage to accommodate them eventually. Especially when the trip is fairly short, as it is with countries like Guatemala and China, it is generally "doable."

Some families bring other children with them on their adoption trip. If a child is healthy, flexible, and no longer a baby, he/she is likely to become a much better big sister/brother as a result of being "in at the beginning" of life with a sibling. Families with young children often choose countries which permit one spouse to travel without the other; it isn't optimal, but it works. Other families leave children with a grandparent or other relative, and keep in touch by phone, by sending pictures by e-mail, and so on.

If only one parent, or neither parent, travels, there is some additional paperwork that is required for an adoption. As an example, if one parent travels, the family must complete the I-864 affidavit of support and carry three years' worth of tax returns.

Also, a child who is seen prior to an overseas adoption by only one spouse in a two parent family or by neither spouse comes home on an IR-4 visa. He/she MUST be adopted or readopted in his/her home state or, if his/her state permits it, must have his/her overseas adoption "recognized" by the state. Otherwise, the child will not be considered to have had a full and final adoption, will not receive U.S. citizenship until after readoption/recognition, and will not qualify for the tax credit until readoption/recognition occurs.

If a child has been seen by both parents, or by an unmarried parent, prior to the finalization overseas, he/she comes home on an IR-3 visa, does not require a U.S. adoption/readoption unless his/her state mandates it, becomes an automatic citizen as soon as he/she passes through customs and immigration at a U.S. airport, and qualifies for the tax credit in the year of the overseas finalization.

If you can possibly arrange to have at least one parent travel, I would strongly recommend it. If not, you will find that escort is possible for the countries I have mentioned, at least through some agencies.

Please let me know if you have other questions.

Sharon

[Colorbind love]

Just a quick note. Escort is no longer an option with Sierra Leone. In fact, the program is in such flux right now that I would avoid it entirely. Its currently not processing adoptions and no one knows what its going to look like when they do start processing adoptions again. Whatever the outcome, its not likely that its going to return to the option of an escort.

[emmyg03]

Our beautiful baby girl was escorted home from Samoa. We also could not travel due to two other children at home with medical issues. We did not have a problem with bonding and will some day visit her country. I do not feel that this lessened my being a mother at all.