[meganicolson]

I am looking for information from families who have successfully adopted out of birth order.

As an adult adoptee, I personally think that "birth" order is somewhat ridiculous. I was biologically the oldest, but adopted and raised as the youngest. However, I acted mostly like an oldest while my older brother (also adopted) acted, oh, much less like an oldest.

That being said, we have two children adopted from Colombia ages (almost) 3 and 1 1/2. Neither are the oldest or youngest biologically, that just happens to be where they are now after we adopted them. We are beginning the process of adopting a sibling group of 2 or 3 children up to age 10 from Colombia. Now, I understand all the risks associated with bringing older children who have had traumatic early years into a home with younger children. What I am looking for is someone who has done it successfully and what they found that worked best. I would love any advice for how to make the transition smooth and how to handle meltdowns (by any of the children) in response to the adoption. Basically, I'd love any advice on how to make this next adoption a successful one.

Thank you!

Megan

[meganicolson]

Nobody has anything to share on this topic?????

[Juliana13]

You might get more responses by posting in the "foster care and adoption" forum. Although some of them just foster, many also adopt, and either way, they may have better insight on how to integrate the new older siblings with the established younger ones.

They also have good insight on parenting children with traumatic backgrounds, attachment problems, and other issues that may apply to your situation.

Good luck!
- Juliana

[meganicolson]

Thanks,

I'm still learning my way around this forum since I mostly stick in the Colombia section. I'll try that.

Megan