[cheri25]

In April of this year we did a search for my children's birth mothers, and we had successful searchers for both. I posted my story here, so I thought I would give an update.

Our daughter's birth family (mom, dad, sister, brother) were overjoyed that we found them, and it gave them peace of mind. The rumors in Guatemala that go around about parents adopting their children just to harvest organs is still alive and well. Our daughter's birth mother told our searcher that is what she thought had happened to her daughter and that she would never see her alive again. I am so happy that she doesn't have that fear any longer.

We have been able to send pictures, letters, and food gift baskets since then. We were also able to buy the materials and hire an electrician to install electricity for them. This was a great gift to them on two levels, one the obvious, they now have electricity; and two, the land where they live was given to my daughter's birth mother by her father, but she never had title. You can't transfer title unless the land had electric installed, so now she the land is her name!!! We are going to try and get them water rights too, but that will come in time. They have asked us for nothing except for news and picture of their child. Every time the searcher goes for a visit, we get more information and pictures to share with Keira and we get to send letters and pictures to her family. We send them all via email and the searcher translates the letter and prints out our pictures.


My son Jason's birth mother and family live far away in New Santa Catarina, so the only pictures we've received were back in April when the search was done. (the birth mother lived in another town, no home address known). We found out he has a sister who lives in a children's home in Quetzaltenango, but her aunt takes her home on holidays and special occasions, so that made us happy. I was able to find the organization that runs the children's home on facebook, and luckily she speaks English and directed me to the person who works in the specific place where his sister lives!! How cool is that.

On a more serious note, our searcher left her number with our son's aunt during her search in April, and she was contacted by her the week before last. She told our searcher that our son's birth mother (her sister) is ill and has come to stay with her for now. She asked her to ask us if we could help pay for some lab tests to get an accurate diagnosis. Well of course we want to help, so I asked our searcher if she could give us the phone number of the aunt. My sister in law speaks fluent Spanish, so we asked her if she would do us a favor and call Guatemala to get more information for us. Well after playing phone tag last week, my sister in law got through tonight and was able to speak directly with the birth mother!!!!!! We know it wasn't the best of circumstances to have to contact the birth mother, but we were so happy to have this connection. Debbie (my sister in law) said she sounded good, didn't seem to be in any obvious discomfort, and was really excited to talk to her. I guess she has already had some tests done, (doctor wants a few more) and though the diagnosis wasn't totally clear to Debbie, it involved something with vessels, maybe gall bladder, but she said something was obviously lost in translation. At this point we are hopeful it isn't to serious. Has anyone dealt with anything like this? Since she lives in such a rural place, she has to travel for medical care. Does anyone know of any social organizations or traveling medical hospitals/doctors that serve more remote areas in Guatemala?

On a happier note, we learned that my son's sister's birthday is tomorrow (she is turning 7), and her aunt picked her up from the children's home so she could celebrate with her family. She is very happy because she gets to spend this birthday with her mother.

So, that is our update. We do feel overwhelmed at times at trying to navigate the relationship with 2 birth families and struggle with the things we want to do and what we are financially able to do. However we feel very blessed to have a relationship with both birth family's, and my children look forward to pictures and updates and love to talk about visiting them someday.

[Triplets]

You're fortunate to have found them. Good for you for trying. I'm sure your children will love you for doing it!

[kfoster]

That is wonderful you have contact with both families! We do for our son and daughter and are very glad we did have searches done.

[DaughterBound]

love hearing this. I often wonder how difficult it will be to locate Eden's bmom. How on earth did you do it?

[cheri25]

Originally Posted by DaughterBound

love hearing this. I often wonder how difficult it will be to locate Eden's bmom. How on earth did you do it?

There are several searchers that will do birth mother searches in Guatemala. If you want information on the searcher I used, just let me know and I'll pm you the information.

Cheri

[TenleysDaddy]

Hi Cheri,
I've done quite a bit of medical mission work in Santa Catarina and believe we are going back in April 28- May6. But we only spend one day in Catarina and see about 125 patients.
To answer your question, Santa Catarina is definitely off the grid. We typically give the more serious patients a voucher to travel to the larger city's but the cost of getting there causes many of them not to go. I'd be surprised if the bio mom hasn't been one of our patient at one point in time. I can't say if we are going there again this year, but its possible. The sad reality is that all too often our NGO's are the only care these people have sometimes. I know that doesn't help that much BUT wanted you to know we have been there, have done some med work there, but thats pretty much it.

[Gingerella_68]

Hi Cheri, you're very lucky and that's wonderful for your children!!

I was just wondering if you hired your serchears or if they're just people you know?

It would be a amazing to be able to do the same, my older son is starting asking questions... even if everything is ok.

Thanks for your answer!!

Bye

[cheri25]

I will send you a PM later on today.

[alex]

I would love to have some info on how you managed the search.. My daughters birth mom is illiterate. We have tried to find her but have not had success.. We do have contact with my other daughters birth mom in Colombia. If you could give us any info on doing it in Guatemala I would greatly appreciate it!

[brink]

I don't want to sound too skeptical, but I do always wonder how people know that these searchers are truly legitimate and not involved in their own "scamming" of adoptive parents. I just wonder for those who say they have actually contacted birth families, what proof do you have that you are dealing with your child's actual family? Is it just someone's word, or do you have paperwork and confirmation of some sort that you can be sure you have met the right people?

Again, I'm not trying to throw doubts or cold water on anyone, but in a country so rife with corruption because of poverty, how can you be certain? It oftens seems that families are told of someone with medical issues and need of money. Though I am certain there are very legitimate health concerns in connection to such poverty, and of course I know there is great need for financial help. We've seen it first hand, four times on our trips to bring home our older adopted children. I've just always questioned how APs can be certain they are dealing with legitimate sources.

[cheri25]

I did worry about this initially, but all the information we received matched our social worker report and in our case once we got the pictures, there was no doubt. My daughter's birth sister and brother look so much like her, and her sister just looks like a little older version of my daughter. My son's birth sister actually looks like his twin. I was actually shocked to see my son's face staring back at me in the pictures I received.

My daughter's birth family has asked never asked for anything since we found them 1 yr ago. We have sent them food baskets a few times and just recently bought them an ONIL stove. They never asked for this, we did this on our own.

Our son's birth mother was ill and asked for money for lab work. My sister-in-law is fluent in Spanish and was able to talk with her directly about this. That is the one and only time we were directly asked for anything from either family.

I understand the concern and have read where some adoptive families have had to pull back because of continued requets from birth families, but we have not had to deal with this.

[mamaskoby]

Brink, I know my searcher found our son's BirthMom because she took a picture of her with herself. The woman in the picture is clearly the same woman in the DNA pictures we got back from Labcorp.

[TenleysDaddy]

I wish I would have had this information last week as I was in Santa Catarina with a full medical team. I wonder if I saw your birthmom in our clinic?
Anyway, I met with our searcher in person in Antigua Saturday and I can tell you she is awesome! Check to see what "continuing" services your searchers offers. Ours for about $250 US a year goes by our B family once a month to check in and deliver information, pictures and validate concerns, medical conditions etc etc...
If yours doesn't offer this PM me and I will give you Fide contact info.
Ask your biomom if she went to the gringo clinic last week. If so I probabably would have a med chart on her and the suggestions, meds or outcomes of the appointment. If memory serves me correct we saw roughly 75 patients.


Scott

[TenleysDaddy]

I wish I would have had this information last week as I was in Santa Catarina with a full medical team. I wonder if I saw your birthmom in our clinic?
Anyway, I met with our searcher in person in Antigua Saturday and I can tell you she is awesome! Check to see what "continuing" services your searchers offers. Ours for about $250 US a year goes by our B family once a month to check in and deliver information, pictures and validate concerns, medical conditions etc etc...
If yours doesn't offer this PM me and I will give you Fide contact info.
Ask your biomom if she went to the gringo clinic last week. If so I probabably would have a med chart on her and the suggestions, meds or outcomes of the appointment. If memory serves me correct we saw roughly 75 patients.


Scott