[arthymom]

Happy New Year everyone.

So I'm wondering how you navigate the universe of getting a noncompliant toddler ready for school and off to bed at an early hour?

There is an ebb and flow in our lives and at times it's easier and other times harder...But the more I am in a rush to get somewhere the more dd digs in her heels.

Advice beyond making lunches the night b4 and going to bed earlier...We're already doing those...

Thanks

[dac_cincy]

I have threaten to take Bug to daycare in his jammies- that seems to motivate hime, especially after I did it one time.

I don't have to worry about lunches, so I can't help there. But we have eaten breakfast in the car multiple times.

It does help Bug if I tell him that he has x number of minutes to do a task and then I set a timer. This is usually done with a statement that if he does not complete the task, then he will go to daycare in the state he is in.

Love to you,

[KJones5]

Oh gosh, I lived this daily for quite awhile! Find out what motivates your DD. My DS works very well for food! If you help me get you dressed, you get a pretzel, etc. This helps a TON! We have to watch because sugar makes the situation worse so look for healthier snacks!

Also, I put socks on him the night before so I don't have to do that in the am. Seems minor but not having to try and get socks on little feet was a hugh time saver! I've thought about letting him sleep in sweat pants and a shirt so all I would have to do is change his diaper.

We had a rough year of non compliance in the morning but it's gotten significantly better!

[jeannecr]

We team up and get it done. If he won't eat breakfast, I just inform the babysitter and she'll give him a snack. As for getting dressed, we do it calmly whether he kicks and screams or not. It's much tougher if there is only one adult, but not impossible.

[leifjackie]

I'm new at this since today was my first day back to work since August and dd #2's first full day at day care!! So, I'm no pro, but here's what I did ... I picked out her clothing last night. She sleeps in a t-shirt and socks under her pajamas, so I kept the t- and socks on when I dressed her this morning. She happily got up at 6:30 and we were loading in the car at 7:15, bottle still in hand.

Hey, it worked today, but who knows about tomorrow! I talk to her about her "school" but I'm not sure if that makes much sense yet!

[SKL]

When I don't have time for nonsense, I dress the girls while they are sitting on their potties.

My kids also seem to be at their worst when I am most in a hurry. The best trick I've learned is to drink some coffee before approaching any task that is likely to aggravate. Sometimes I think that's what my kids need too!

[StefB]

Hi Arth,

I'm late to work every day. I don't teach first period, so I can get away with it.

The only thing that really makes T move is if I threaten to take her dolls away. I did it once, and she takes it very seriously. I just have to make sure I don't overuse it.

This issue is the hardest part of raising T right now.

Good luck!

[Theslaws]

We do a sticker chart. My girls are 2 and 3 and some mornings are rough! THey are both very independent! They get a sticker for getting dressed, brushing teeth, going to the bathroom and eating. So far just getting the sticker is motivating enough but eventually im sure Ill have to give a token item if they fill up all 4 pictures for 3 days in a row or something like that. Im always amazed that just these tiny stickers are enought to stop and arguement and get them to do what they need to do but it works for now!!!

Good luck!

[ej-momtobe]

We have found a bunch of little things help. I usually let him help choose the clothes if he cooperates. That helps sometimes, but not all times. This morning when DS was fussy, DH just hugged him for a minute until he calmed down. We usually are not in a rush in the morning, so that helps...when I do need to be at the office by a certain time, I plan my morning so I drop him off 30 minutes before I really would need to, so I have a time buffer to deal with fussy toddler without stressing.

[mcnay1]

Routine, routine, routine.... Get into a good one and it makes it a lot easier in the mornings. I dont have to give the boys breakfast, so that makes it much easier. But, they do get something in the car since JD wont eat breakfast at school. Anyway, If all else fails and Im getting really frustrated, I offer the boys a movie in the car on the way to school. It is such a treat that they jump to it and we are out the door in no time. But, here is our routine:

Boys get up anywhere between 6:00-7:15.
DH gets up at 6:00 and is gone by 6:30 (its actually easier when he is not there)
The boys watch their "shows" in our bed until about 7:20 while I get up and get dressed from 6:55-7:25 or so.
I get the little guy dressed first while our bigger guy goes to the potty one last time and takes off his night night clothes. (I do have to time this right...we have to be able to say bye bye to Blues Clues during the credits)
Once Will is dressed, I make his bed and we are off to JD's room. I make his bed while he puts his underwear on and sometimes pants if I have gotten them out. Then, we pick out a shirt and put his shoes and socks on.
Then, its downstairs to let the dog out and feed her, I gather all our stuff up for the day if I didnt do it the night before and we are out the door.

Some suggestions - if your child is old enough to choose what she/he wants to wear, let them. I usually will pull down 2 acceptable shirts and let them pick which one. Sometimes, same eith underwear and with pants. Depends on my mood. They know that when it is time to get dressed, it is time to get dressed. Sometimes, that little extra bribe of a movie or treat in the car is needed, though.

Good luck. ONce you get into that routine that works for you, everything will be fine.

[Slatond10]

Single Working Mom! and I suggest "routine." I allow enough time in the AM for some things I know she likes ( i.e. 1 tv show while I get ready.) Once that show is over it is her turn to get dressed. We have a certian order we do everything in the AM.

( now PM is a little different because I am a morning person so sometimes DD sleeps in her clothes if she doesn't want to go change into PJ's )

[megaphonemo]

We do everything while the wiggles is on at 7AM. There is nothing else that will distract the 3 year old... Some mornings are rougher than others and I have learned to pick my battles (yes, you may have one skittle, if you will just GET OUT OF BED!!!)... Other advice is to get up earlier than you need to... Always.......

[mishaac]

single working mom here too....I have a tween and toddler to get out the door by 7:15ish...I try to get as much done as possible the night before....i.e., making lunches and stashing them in the fridge, laying out next day's clothes, loading up the car with any extras or essentials for the next day. The prep work the night before is what saves us most days. I've learned to relax about the definition of "breakfast" and try to pick things for them to eat that are easily transferred into the car for the ride to school.

[jking5344]

I love 1-2-3 Magic! Reading this book gives you practical solutions to lots of daily situations like this. I have to create leverage for my daughter. For a while, she couldn't have her "gummy" (a multi-vitamin) 'til she was buckled in her car seat. It's something I wanted her to have anyway, but she thought it was a treat, so that's how we got throught the entire morning. I use that strategy with her for EVERYthing now. At night I gave her a nightlight to create the leverage to keep her in her bed (the light goes out if she gets out of her bed).

I highly suggest this book if you haven't read it already.

Good luck!

Jessie

[stacytoadopt]

Ongoing issue with my 3 year old. Routine helps, but...

I have been trying different tricks. For 6 weeks, it worked that if we were on time, we went her way to school, if we were late we went my way. Time wise it is the same, but she liked saying we were going her way. That isn't working now.

Tried the chart - that worked for a while,

Seems like every 4-6 weeks I need to come up with something new to make it fun.

Stopping and getting a donut before school if we are early sometimes works.

Getting up an extra 30 min early so she has time to play sometimes works.

Walking into the garage and letting the door shut behind me works to calm me down - and she HATES it. I hate to do it to - but better then yelling at her to get dressed.

knowing that if I rush and push and say hurry hurry hurry, or if I let her set the pace - we leave at about the same time - just sets the day off bad if I do the former - nice calm morning if I just wait.

tried to select clothes the night before - haven't had much luck with that yet.

bringing her in PJs - not idea -

no coat, shoes - not practical now -

hoping that this is a short stage!!!

We just had a 2 week break from school (I had a teenager come over to the house and watch her) The last two days have gone well - so maybe she just needed a vacation from it all. We will see what tomorrow brings.

looking forward to seeing other things to try.