[stacytoadopt]

Originally Posted by stephjoel99

But how they choose to raise their baby - is that any of our business? If we are deserving then of an explanation of how they plan to handle their family, why then do we not deserve that same explanation from Barack Obama (who is presumably separated frequently from his children) and his wife, a working woman. Should we not be getting an explanation of how they are picking up the slack?

We dont' have to agree with candidate's choices on how to raise their family - but I was just trying to point out that men do not get the same scrutiny as fathers as working women do as mothers.

If you don't like Palin's politics, I think that is a perfectly legitimate reason not to vote for her. But to not like her because you haven't been briefed on her family's child care arrangements, that is, I think, unfair.

I just just expressing my opinion on the question:

'SO without getting your political hat on, what do you think of a VP and possible president doing this job with young children at home?'

nothing about who I would or would not vote for. I feel the same way about a mother or a father. It was just my opinion. Sorry if I offended.

[stephjoel99]

Originally Posted by stacytoadopt

I just just expressing my opinion on the question:

'SO without getting your political hat on, what do you think of a VP and possible president doing this job with young children at home?'

nothing about who I would or would not vote for. I feel the same way about a mother or a father. It was just my opinion. Sorry if I offended.

Stacy I didn't mean "you" you, I meant the you in the everybody sense. I am sorry if I sounded preachy-bones.

This is just an issue near and dear to my heart - I graduated law school and found out I was pregnant shortly thereafter. I took the bar, had my daughter and realized nobody wanted to hire me because I had a brand new baby.

I worked from home on a contract basis until I found the right position. But then I found out I was pregnant again and my husband and I did the math and realized that it made more sense for me to stay home. And then another baby came and then our adoption.

I do not regret how things have turned out. At all. But I have been looked down upon and criticized by my lawyer friends who work outside the home. They think I wasted a law degree and a chance at a promising career. They also assume I look down on their choices, which I don't.

My SAHM-friends always tell me how I made the right choice b/c my kids are better off with a mom at home - which feels false b/c I would have been a working mom in a snap (and planned to be) but for the timing.

So I kind of see it both ways - and partisan politics aside in all seriousness b/c I do not know who I'm voting for - I just think it's unfair for Palin's parenting choices to be under so much scrutiny when it's never been discussed who's taking care of Obama's kids.

[SKL]

Originally Posted by KKR213

I agree that any candidate - male or female should not have their competency judged just because they are also a parent. There have been many successful elected officials that have young children. But I do wonder why any parent would want to put their 17 year old child (and the child's boyfriend) through world wide scrutiny. Even if the families are happy about the pregnancy and upcoming birth, it must be a hard and personal situation for a 17 year old.

I've seen this concern expressed a few times.

I feel it's quite possible that Bristol doesn't want her pregnancy to interfere with her mom's chance to be VP.

I know we think of 17 as young, but maturity varies from child to child. I started my second year of college at 17; I was a woman, not a child. My mom was married at 17; she was a woman, not a child. If I had found myself in Bristol's position at 17, I would have sat my mom down and told her that she should forge ahead and I would be OK. Yeah, a lot of things about the situation would suck whether she was governor or VP candidate, and some things would be worse due to the national scrutiny. But all that will blow over. Like they say, eat a live toad first thing in the morning, and nothing worse can happen to you for the rest of the day.

Bristol is old enough to understand that all that trash isn't really about her at all, but about some voters looking for any excuse to disrespect the opposing ticket. I am sure it is hurtful, but if it wasn't her pregnancy, it would be something else; and if it wasn't her, it would be someone else's kid.

I think the greater shame would be if a woman dropped out because of her daughter becoming a woman a bit sooner than expected. Apparently that's what her family decided, and I respect that.

I didn't notice too many people saying Edwards should drop out when his wife was fighting an often fatal disease while raising two small children. Outside of gender and political bias, I don't see how folks can justify a different standard for Palin.

[azamboni]

SKL, that's a good point about Edwards.

Since we're all adoptive parents, how about if Palin had a four-month old that was recently adopted from another country? Although it would spotlight adoptive parenting in the media, would we think it was great that she was taking an uber-high-pressure position with countless hours of travel and responsibility? Even working moms here have taken time off to bond and attach with their little ones. And to me, there is a big difference between being a working mom and the vice-president of a country. Just as some committed time with their parents is important to help our little ones through their transitions, I feel that her little guy with Down syndrome would benefit from having the hands-on support of his entire family to help him through all of the challenges and triumphs he will have. I just wouldn't have made the same choice Sarah Palin did (and it's likely I won't be offered the choice anytime soon -- LOL!). But just my opinion, of course.

[KKR213]

Originally Posted by SKL

I didn't notice too many people saying Edwards should drop out when his wife was fighting an often fatal disease while raising two small children. Outside of gender and political bias, I don't see how folks can justify a different standard for Palin.

I think he was awful even thinking of running for President while his wife had a fatal disease but now we now more about his personality.

And if McCain/Palin get elected, then the attention on her daughter will not go away and may even get worse.

[gwenrenee007]

Originally Posted by SKL

I didn't notice too many people saying Edwards should drop out when his wife was fighting an often fatal disease while raising two small children. Outside of gender and political bias, I don't see how folks can justify a different standard for Palin.

I think that most of all it comes down to gender and people thinking mother's should be more involved (or SAHM) than men. Of course political bias does play a role too. I think if Palin were democrat - I as a democrat would react differently as would republicans, I don't think the ones on here would necessarily be singing her praise and I would probably be defending her.

[devildogwife]

I LOVE her. I too have a child who is medically fragile and for some reason, hearing about her son gave me a lot of hope. Plus, having a Native American son, I love knowing that her children and DH are Alaska natives.

[dutchmum]

As a person looking to the elections from the outside. I have no voting rights being a green card holder. It is funny to see the attacks, since in the Netherlands this is unheard of. And we have more then 2 parties to vote for. There is a party for every opinion or view.

As for Gov Palin having VP nomination, i don't know much about politics, values and so forth.
I don't think it is fair to judge her on her ability to manage a household and raise kids. Judge her on her job and her ability to govern. I do think that the country is right for a female perspective. Democrat or Republican.
I always find it funny that more conservative countries in this world have had female premiers and prime ministers, including Muslim countries but the US is not ready to change. Women who had to raise their kids while running a country and it wasn't a big deal for the people voting for them.
Granted how you raise your family does say something about your style of governing, but you can say the same of a man. It will show your values and how you are dealing with stressful situations within the family unit. The fact that they are dealing with the pregnancy daughter and the SN child says a lot about their family unit in total. I'm i agreeing with the solutions no, but that is a personal opinion and i would have handled it differently. But since i don't know the ins and outs I don't think it is fair to have a total opinion about this. All i have is what is being reported by the Media.
If you have issues you should raise the debate on whether or not abstinence by it self works (without the information on contraceptives), but not attack her family.
Maybe the US should look at other western countries where teenage pregnancy are not as high. And see what they are doiing to educate their kids and teenagers.
Okay it is becoming too political so i will stop.

[Leebert2]

I have absolutely no problem with working moms. I am a working mom. My mom was a working mom. She did an excellent job raising me and I plan to do the same with my daughters. That is not the reason why I am not impressed with her. I truly hope she does not become our vice president. Okay, stopping again before my big mouth gets me in trouble! Just thought I'd clarify that point. I am the last person who would discriminate against a working mother or imply that men have certain rights that women can't - so it was important for me to clarify.

[kacmom1]

I am very impressed by Palin and will absolutely vote for her. Being a strong supporter of stay at home moms, my first thought though, when I heard that she was running for VP, was...."how can she do that with 5 kids, one a newborn Downs baby, at home?" My husband said "relax....maybe her husband will be taking care of the kids!" He's right! They seem like a very smart, loving, and respected family. And what a great opportunity for those kids-to have all of the experiences that they'll have being the family of the VP of the US! A once in a lifetime opportunity!!!

[robandjulie]

Originally Posted by stephjoel99

No one is questioning Barack Obama - or Michelle Obama for that matter, a working woman - about their parenting choices.

(just picking the first one I saw addressing this comparison, not intentionally quoting anyone in particular)

There is a huge difference between parenting your typical 7 & 9 year olds and parenting a 4 month old SN child.

Assuming Michelle Obama chose to forgo her current roles and handle "only" FL roles or even if she also worked, she'd in theory have 6-7 hours of the school day. Unless they're homeschooling already the parenting choices here are pretty straightforward and typical--work during the school day and a bit past, then family time in the evening. They'd have a lot less time as a family than a typical family with elementary to MS aged kids, but the girls are old enough to understand and to have busy lives (school) of their own. I think that's why it's not brought up as much. It's not the same situation.

As for Palin, most people are not concerned about her 19, 17, 13 or even her 7 year old (not sure on ages, going from birth years) or her ability to be their mother and do her job; with the exception of the over-focus on the pregnancy which will resolve itself soon and blow over. It's the SN 4 mo that causes concerns about the timing here, I believe.

Based on Palin's husband's jobs as I've seen them listed (oil field operator and owns a fishing biz), I doubt he will be working them directly in DC and will likely act as primary caregiver to Trig and the other kids. If he's up for being a semi-single parent and the challenges of their SN child's care, then I don't see that as a voting point one way or the other.

I am the primary (only) wage earner in our home and DH is the primary caregiver. It works for us. I may only get to join them for dinner 3-4 nights of the week or sneak in at bedtime for a kiss sometimes, but DH and I are both very comfortable with our roles and it works for us. VP is far more stressful and time consuming with more time away, I'd imagine, but that's their choice. But I DO want to point out a difference in questioning how their family may handle this process while parenting a baby with SN and the the media's lack of focus on the two relatively older Obama children. To me, that question is not about him versus her but the issue of special needs--either way I find it irrelevant in my voting.

[nwparents]

She may be a perfectly fine mother, but like being a great war hero, that is irrelevant in my opinion. Don't hand me out to dry here, but I actually am a bit offended by her nomination - it seems as if McCain and/or his advisors felt any woman would do - experienced or not- as if women would just vote for her because she was herself a woman and a mother. Weird pick, in my opinion. Not my business how she handles childcare - just how she would handle the country.

[susy...patience]

Well, I just listened to Palin's speech so hear are my 2nd thoughts....

I like her.
As I said before, I'm no Republican so that doesn't mean I am going to vote for her, but I admire her guts in just taking on the race.

And she gave a good, feisty speech (even filled with references to being a mom -- like saying that she gave up perks of being governor to save money, like Governor's personal chef--although her kids still miss the chef).

In comparison to me, I would like to note that there are some (and some have told this to my face) who question me becoming an adoptive single mom at my age (49 with 17month old) with a demanding job and not living around family or other significant support. But you know what I am doing it (and surviving pretty good most days) despite the criticism. My experience makes me reluctant to criticize how another woman chooses to run her personal life.

[alreadylove2005]

I loved most of her speech.....I could have done without some of the "snipes" at the Democrats and the obvious sound-bite comments. But I wasn't bored, that's for sure. It's going to be an interesting race!

I am sorry to see Democrats and Republicans become SO polarized. I see many of my friends, automatically love any and all members of their own party and hate any and all members of the other party. Since when are things so black and white? Since when do we have to so vehemently dislike people because of their opinions?

I wish we could return to respecting other people as people and simply disagreeing with their opinions. I hope that I respect Obama AND McCain. And for the record I agree with some of the ideas of both of them. My final voting decision will depend on how much weight I place on the various issues. But I do believe that whoever wins, they are both men to be respected. Biden and Palin are both people to be respected. Just my humble opinion.....

[Waiting4Celeste]

I also LOVED her speech!
Anytime that I can actually laugh out loud at a candidate's speech - it gets a thumbs up in my book!!

I just keep thinking - what would I do if I was in her position??

If I was offered a job that was nearly the top level in my field? Would I give it up because I had young kids at home?

I don't think I would.

I gave up my career to be a SAHM, and honestly there are days that I seriously question my decision.

Not because I don't enjoy being a mother - I LOVE it! But there are times that I wonder what message I am sending to my kids about their dreams?

To give up their dreams if they choose to be parents?

(Not that this would EVER happen...) but how would I feel if McCain came to me and offered me the position of his running mate and I turned it down simply because I had kids? I think I'd kick myself later and I'd hate for my kids to grow up thinking that THEY were the reason I passed up such an opportunity. If my mother had that opportunity, I'd want her to take it!

But this is MY opinion. People ask us a lot why we travel so often without our kids and insinuate that once the kids come along, the marriage gets put on the back burner. That's not how we live. Our marriage comes first - always - no matter what. Our kids need to learn how to be in a marriage. Just like they need to see their parents pursuing their dreams so that they will, one day, believe they can pursue theirs too.

As for the new little baby, I would assume that she has a plan in place to make sure that he is well taken care of... whomever that might be. Her husband is also the parent of that baby - he should be just as responsible for the raising of that child as she is. I know that if I had a great job and could support our family - my DH would be a great Mr Mom!

Anyway.... politics aside, I am for allowing people to pursue their dreams and to use their talents and skills to make the world a better place - whether that be in their own home, or as the VP of our country.