[whereintheworld]

I generally, happily answer "they are now". I sort of sometimes have a "look that could kill", according to my DH, so most people don't probe further with me. We are at the point now, that after an interaction like that, I usually talk to the kids about what our options can be when people ask about adoption, and that we can always choose not to share information. But, I am sure in the future that my son or daughter will have a quick comeback, and I'll probably be fine with that.

[Aveasmom]

The only problem is if you say "yes they are", they will come back with a comment about the birthmom not knowing how to stop it from happening over and over. I have already heard this many times when people ask how many children she has. I thought I was going to have to kick some booty one night defending the birthmom. But I raised my voice and said "thank goodness she hasn't figured it out, because look what I am getting!" " I am the LUCKY ONE out of the deal".

[Dmitry'smom]

my children are eight years apart but look a lot alike so we get this question all the time. Most people stop once I say that of course they are. Every once and a while we get someone who really pushes it with the "but are they REAL brother and sister??" and I just say well I am their REAL mother and they are my children so that would make them REAL brother and sister. I must have said it kind of snotty because the person actually apologized.

Amber, Dmitry used the same line when someone kept pushing him about his "real" mom.

[fochtru]

I know that we all get tired of these questions, but I don't think that everyone who asks them is being rude. I think that not everyone knows the PC terms. I have two adopted sisters (adopted almost 40 years ago). My mom still calls Andrew's birth mom his 'natural mom'. She's not doing it to be rude, it's the term that was used when we adopted my sisters.

My guess is that people just don't know that "biological sisters" would be more appropriate than saying 'real sisters'. It's actually none of their business, but I think people who haven't been involved with adoption are just naturally curious. They are probably curious as to how you find AP's bio sister and have the chance to adopt her. That would be a wonderful story if that was the case. (Essie is a wonderful story all by herself, but you know what I mean)

I'm pretty sure I've said some things in my life and asked some questions that were considered rude but I didn't mean for them to be. I was just trying to show interest in the situation and was genuinely curious about the family in a 'wow, what an amazing, wonderful story' kind of way.

I guess my answer (if I wasn't in the mood to educate them) would be, "They are real and they are sisters."

[candkss]

This is the MOST ANNOYING ?????EVER and I get it at least once a DAY....so sad for NAT....HUGS

[SKL]

Ugh, this just happened to us today, but a different way. People always ask if my girls (age 19 and 22 mos) are twins, and I say no, just close in age. If they press, I say they are 3 months apart. Today that happened, and then the asker said (in front of the girls, of course), "they aren't sisters??" To which I answered, "they aren't biological sisters" and the girls were looking back and forth like, "whoa, all this time you've been telling us we're sisters!?" so I followed up clumsily about how they certainly are sisters. Not one of my more shining moments as a mom.

[crayolamom]

My response would be...Yes, of coursethey are sisters! Aren't they just adorable...are your children sisters? I would probably not say this, but I would think it.

[isabel41206]

say yes they are real sisters. they have the same parents (you and dh) live in the same house. yep that says real sis to me.